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The phenomenon of winning or losing something in your mind before you win or lose it in reality is called "The Inner Game."
This is the subject of the book The Inner Game of Tennis (written in the 1970s by W. Timothy Gallwey). It's about overcoming the external obstacles we create that prevent us from succeeding. You don’t need to be interested in tennis or even know anything about it to benefit from this book.
When we are learning something new, we often internally talk to ourselves. Self 1 is the conscious self. Self 2 the subconscious. The two are always in dialogue.If both selves can communicate in harmony, everything goes well.
There is a time for instruction and putting in the effort. But trying too hard may produce negative results.
Instead, step back and take in less feedback. On a deeper level, we know what to do. We just need to overcome the habit of the mind getting in the way.
We are often encouraged to think positively, but this is not always the right approach.
We need to stop attaching judgments to our performance, positive or negative, and see things as they are. This action unlocks a process of natural development. As soon as you understand the effort and accept it as it is, a natural process of change begins.
We should pay attention to how we learn and if we're learning in the best possible way:
SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:
... so they don't overwhelm you and affect your judgment.
In order to change the way you feel about a situation, you must first change the way you think about it.
Increased fear of rejection: “I’m applying for my dream job. I’ll be devastated if they don’t hire me.”
Decreased fear of rejection: “I’m applying for three exciting positions. If one doesn’t pan out, there are two more I’m well qualified for.”
How we handle stressful situations can make the difference between being assertive versus reactive, and poised versus frazzled. When under pressure, the most important thing to keep in mind is to keep our cool.
Toxic shame is an emotion that most of us get to know throughout our lifetime: deep inside, we feel that we have failed ourselves or the others.
The actual issue, when...
Anybody who is obsessed with the idea of being perfect will most probably end up having a major frustration. To put it simply, making mistakes is just natural for us, humans.
On the other, even though feeling ashamed for what you have done is quite upsetting, not taking responsibility or pretending to be someone you are not is way worse.
When making a mistake, some individuals find it extremely difficult to admit and apologize. This often leads to misunderstandings and even more tense relationships.
On the contrary, self-confident people will freely admit whenever they have made a mistake or have been wrong about something, as self development is possible only by acknowledging our own weaknesses.