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This is when it makes sense to compare yourself to others

https://www.fastcompany.com/90458435/how-social-comparisons-can-motivate-you-to-excel

fastcompany.com

This is when it makes sense to compare yourself to others
About a year ago, I joined a rowing gym that's much like spin-only you're pulling oars. The classes are punishing. One of the nice things, besides the loud music, is that I often sit next to someone around my age and engage in some friendly competition.

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Social Comparisons

A social comparison happens when we are measuring ourselves by the success or the failures of others. We all use social comparisons to motivate ourselves.

  • Upward comparisons make us dissatisfied, as we line up ourselves with someone better than us.
  • Downward comparisons make us feel better about our status, and sometimes feel pity for the other.

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Compete With Yourself

If you find the external upward social comparisons de-motivating, it is a good idea to shift your focus inwards, and compare your past with your present, while keep pushing yourself every week, month and year. Having a written record of your performance creates a tangible comparison chart to work with.

Downward comparisons help us find motivation when we are feeling low, as it gives perspective. They also provide us with an urge to help others in need, igniting our energies to mentor and support those in need.

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The shortcomings of always comparing yourself to others

Individuals have always had the tendency to compare themselves to others. However, this can only have negative effects on our life: it deprives you of joy, it makes you lose precious time that ...

Tips to overcome the need to compare yourself to others

While comparing yourself to others can cause serious harm to your life, there are some tips you can use in order to avoid this behaviour.

Among these tips, some of the most interesting refer to how to become aware of the negative effects this comparison has on your life, practise gratitude, learn to admire and learn from others or focus on yourself- so you can become a better version of yourself.

Checking the headlines

The news  can bring negativity: our impotence to do anything about most of what we hear can lead to a sense of hopelessness. It saps mental energy and focus.

Opting out of fo...

Toxic comparison

To break free from the temptation to compare, audit your social media feeds.

If you find yourself thinking about how your life matches up to a friend’s when you’re not on social media, try to shift your perspective. Think about their human traits, vulnerabilities, and things that you have in common. When you change your mindset, you can move from a place of jealousy to a place of empathy. 

2 types of comparisons

  • Downward comparison (comparing ourselves to those less fortunate): It activates the brain’s “lack” network, emphasizing our insecurity and focuses on safeguarding the status quo at the expense of risk and adventure.
  • Upward comparison (comparing ourselves to those we envy): it can excite feelings of envy and low self-esteem.

Both of these types of comparison can be bad for the brain

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You can generate Motivation

You can produce motivation at your own command if you understand how it works.

Motivation is not random. Like every other effect, it's caused by something. When you grasp this, y...

Power versus Force

Forcing yourself to work is like swimming against the current. You'll need a lot of force to get to your destination.

Getting yourself motivated to do the work is like swimming with the current. You'll make use of power that will energize and support you. You'll get to your destination in a completely different mood and perspective.

Generate the power of Motivation

The most likely reason you feel unmotivated is that you are in a lousy state of mind. It can be caused by various things, like:

  • Feeling stressed
  • Sleeping in
  • Excessive drinking
  • Hanging out with unmotivated and unambitious people
  • The lack of clear goals & priorities
  • Watching a lot of TV or Netflix or scrolling through social media
  • Eating bad foods that create energy crashes or a heavy feeling
  • Procrastinating

As an antidote, apply a few state change 'hacks' to turn your state of mind.