Conflict Avoidance Doesn’t Do You Any Favors

Some form of conflict is a normal part of our personal and professional lives. While it’s OK to never be completely comfortable with confrontation, being able to resolve issues effectively means accepting it as a healthy part of communicating with others.

Disagreeing provides deeper understanding and makes it easier to connect with our friends, partners, and co-workers.

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Why Avoiding Conflict Is the Wrong Move

healthline.com

What Conflict Avoidance Is

Conflict avoidance is a type of people-pleasing behavior that typically arises from a deep rooted fear of upsetting others.

Many of these tendencies can be traced back to growing up in an environment that was dismissive or hypercritical:

  • enduring uncomfortable situations instead of expressing issues openly
  • denying an issue exists by ignoring it
  • fear of disappointing others
  • deliberately sidestepping conversations
  • silently resenting unresolved issues.

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Strategies for Overcoming Conflict Avoidance
  • Reframe confrontation - Conflict resolution is not about "fighting". It's about standing up for yourself and communicating when you feel frustrated.
  • Make a plan - Rehearse concise points you’d like to get across so you’ll feel confident when addressing them.
  • Recognize and manage your feelings - Instead of trying to sedate emotions try looking at them through the lens of self-compassion.
  • Resolve issues in real-time rather than endlessly ruminate and allow conflicts to fester in your head.

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