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How to Conquer Your Fears Once and for All
Decide if you should face your fear
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- Consider the pros and cons of not facing your fear.
- Write those down.
- Identify the pros and cons of tackling your fears head-on.
- Write down what you might achieve or how your life might be different.
The best way to conquer a fear is to face your fears head-on in a healthy manner that helps you move past the fear rather than in a way that traumatizes you.
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Key Ideas
Evaluate Risk Level
Just because something feels scary, doesn’t mean it’s actually risky. Educate yourself about the facts and the risks you actually face by doing the things that scare you.
Create an Action Plan
The key to facing your fears is to take one small step at a time. Going too fast or doing something too scary before you are ready can backfire.
Keep moving forward. A moderate amount of anxiety is good. Don’t wait to take a step forward until your anxiety disappears.
If you can’t actually do the thing that scares you to practice, you might use imagined exposure.
Seek Professional Help
- If you have a specific phobia that you are not able to conquer on your own.
- If your fears are debilitating, or you aren’t having much success facing them on your own.
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- Fear of being wrong. People with this fear are extremely focused on rules, ethics, standards, and “right vs wrong.”
- Fear of not being good enough. Those with this fear tend to be insecure, intensely focused on their image, and desperate to prove their worth.
- Fear of missing out. This drives leaders to constantly seek new opportunities and experiences and to pursue multiple interests at once.
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Admit your fear
In the first phase, take a close look at your history. Examine the choices you've made and the reasons behind those choices.
For instance, not putting effort into pursuing your own interests but instead, activities in which you can excel could point to the fear of not being good enough.
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There’s a big difference between being an introvert and being afraid of public speaking, meeting people and speaking up when necessary. Social anxiety is not introversion, it’s a fear you must face and overcome.
Thinking before speaking and acting
- Make sure that you speak up when you have something important to say.
- Take advantage of your ability to observe other people, the environment you’re in and the energy flow in the room.
- People will pay more attention to what you say when you do speak up.
- You probably have the ability to study things better and faster, so when you do say something make sure that it’s an eye-opener.
- People will trust you more and thus you’ll have access to more privileged information.
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