In order for a relationship where both people feel seen, it must develop vulnerability.
As we spend more consistent time together, we are also incrementally revealing and sharing more of who we are with each other. The more we let someone see us (always increasing our positivity with responses such as affirmation, acceptance, and empathy) then the more loved we’ll feel for who we are.
MORE IDEAS FROM THE ARTICLE
A friendship is a mutual relationship between two people that is satisfying, safe, and where both people feel seen.
Positive feelings are paramount to our friendships because these are the relationships we are entering by choice. We all want our friendships to add more joy, peace, and support to our lives.
Consistency is the action of repeating our time together which in turn develops our trust as we begin to create and modify expectations of each other. It’s what builds a shared history and increases our commitment and feeling of support in each other.
If our friendships are going to last a long time, we will have to accept that change will happen, and it won't always be comfortable.
If a friendship is feeling weird, use the concept called the "friendship triangle." The triangle base is positivity, and the two sides are consistency and vulnerability. Look at your friendship through this triangle to see what's off-balance.
To be best friends, you are committed to always be on standby. It's not that hard to be there for someone when you can physically be there, but when you're separated by state or time zone, you have to figure out a new way to be close.
Friendships are built on mutuality and reciprocity — be there for her, so that she will be there for you.
If you can’t be straight with her or feel the need to hide your actions or tell untruths, the relationship is being built on shifting sand and won’t be able to withstand any real challenges.