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These 5 Speaking Habits Make People Want To Collaborate With You
Nix The Negatives
Negative like “I can’t” or “I won’t” distance you from teammates and give the impression that you’re in opposition to someone or something.
Try to propose an alternative or at least soften your phrasing.
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Limit First-Person Pronouns
When you’re trying to sound collaborative and inclusive, you need to keep “I,” “me,” and “mine” to a minimum.
Emphasize the team with statements like “we did this” or “our team achieved that.”
Nix The Negatives
Negative like “I can’t” or “I won’t” distance you from teammates and give the impression that you’re in opposition to someone or something.
Try to propose an alternative or at least soften your phrasing.
Mention A Shared Goal
Speak in terms of common objectives.
People who are good at making others want to work with them tend to continuously reemphasize the goals and outcomes they share with their team.
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Ground Yourself In Reality
Brainstorming lets you speculate without restriction, but your ideas must be checked against reality. Be realistic about what options are actionable, and then take the next steps.
...Identify First Steps
Big tasks tend to lead to procrastination if we don’t immediately choose the first steps. Study past similar tasks, the necessity for it and how to achieve it.
Having a time and a place when you know you’ll need to present your ideas to an audience is a good way to force you to structure your approach.
Choose Specific Goals
Breaking your big picture into specific doable goals will make it much more actionable. Especially if they come with a finite timeline.
Big questions are worth asking but they should be framed in a way that doesn’t feel burdensome or insurmountable.
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The shared context
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Working from home misconceptions
Working from home does not mean you are a remote worker. For a lot of people “working from home” is synonymous with not really working, but instead sitting at home in comfy clothes and doing anything but working. Because no one is really watching you.
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- Assume remote, even if you have only 1 person that is not coming to the office. So make sure to share all the information from meetings in a written format.
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1:1 meetings
1:1 meetings matter. It is important to nurture that essential employee-manager relationship. But it still not easy to get right.
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1:1 category
The goal of an effective 1:1 is not an update from your direct report or for you to lay down some instructions. It's a conversation. It's a chance to hear about your direct reports' ideas for your product, their career goals, and possibly their opinion of their performance.
Keep a list of three potential topics ready for discussion. When they say they have nothing to discuss, you can jumpstart the conversation with one of your items.
Manager's best tool
Your most precious resource is your own time and energy. When you spend it on your team, it helps build healthy relationships.
Your job as a manager isn't to give advice or 'save the day.'' It's to empower your reports to find the answer themselves. If you want to understand what's going on, ask. Let her lead the conversation while you listen and probe.
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