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Interdependence Can Build a Lasting and Safe Relationship
The Interdependent Relationship
- Healthy boundaries
- Active listening
- Time for personal interests
- Clear communication
- Taking personal responsibility for behaviors
- Creating safety for each other to be vulnerable
- Engaging and responding to each other
- Healthy self-esteem
- Being open and approachable with each other
When partners feel cherished and valued, the relationship becomes a safe haven and a place where the couple can be interdependent.
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Key Ideas
Interdependence
Being dependent on another person can be unhealthy. Independence, taken to an extreme, can actually get in the way of us being able to connect emotionally with others in a meaningful way.
Interdependence suggests that partners recognize and value the importance of the emotional bond they share while maintaining a solid sense of self within the relationship dynamic.
Codependency
A codependent person tends to rely heavily on others for their sense of self and well-being. There is an enmeshed sense of responsibility to another person to meet their needs and/or for their partner to meet all of their needs to feel okay about who they are.
Traits of a codependent relationship
- Poor/no boundaries
- People-pleasing behaviors
- Reactivity
- Unhealthy, ineffective communication
- Manipulation
- Difficulty with emotional intimacy
- Controlling behaviors
- Blaming each other
- Low self-esteem of one or both partners
- No personal interests or goals outside the relationship
The Interdependent Relationship
- Healthy boundaries
- Active listening
- Time for personal interests
- Clear communication
- Taking personal responsibility for behaviors
- Creating safety for each other to be vulnerable
- Engaging and responding to each other
- Healthy self-esteem
- Being open and approachable with each other
When partners feel cherished and valued, the relationship becomes a safe haven and a place where the couple can be interdependent.
Build an Interdependent Relationship
- Know what you like and what matters to you
- Don't be afraid to ask for what you want
- Spend time with friends and family
- Continue pursuing your personal goals
- Be mindful of your values
- Make time for hobbies and interests
- Don't be afraid to say "no"
- Don't keep yourself small or hidden to please others
Allowing your partner room and opportunity to do these same things will be the key to establishing a healthy, interdependent relationship.
SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:
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Key Ideas
Codependent vs Interdependent
Codependency in relationships means being overly preoccupied with your partner to the point of losing your own sense of who you are and what you need.
Partners in an interdependent or s...
Keep Working On Yourself
The key to making your relationship more interdependent is to take stock of your life. Find purpose and meaning outside of your relationship.
Not only will it make you happier and better as a person, but it may also improve intimacy and passion in your relationship.
Have Regular "Friend Dates"
It’s healthy to have regular time with your friends without your partner. A little time apart also creates mystique and plays into that tried but true adage that absence makes the heart grow fonder.
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Key Ideas
Knowledge
When forming deep, intimate relationships, we share a vast amount of personal information that we wouldn't necessarily feel comfortable sharing with others.
We feel safe sharing ou...
Interdependence
Intimate relationships also tend to be highly interdependent, wherein each partner influences the other meaningfully, frequently, and vastly, in terms of topic and importance.
Care
While the display of care can differ from one person to the next (as a function of communication style or differing displays of affection, for instance), intimate partners tend to display genuine, selfless care for each other.
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7
Key Ideas
Getting To The Root Of Your Reluctance
If you find it difficult to share your past experiences, ask yourself why you are reluctant to open up. Getting to the root of the reluctance is key.
Work Out Your Feelings First
Before you talk to your partner about something difficult, find the right words to express it first. Until you can verbalize it, it remains unknown to you and to your partner.
If you do not feel safe enough to talk through these issues, consider journaling, or talking with a counsellor until you are clear about how you are feeling.
Open Up In Small Steps
When you decide to open up, start by taking small steps to test the waters first.
The more you practice and see that you can do it, the easier it will get for you to open up.
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