Interdependence

Intimate relationships also tend to be highly interdependent, wherein each partner influences the other meaningfully, frequently, and vastly, in terms of topic and importance.

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Love & Family

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Knowledge

When forming deep, intimate relationships, we share a vast amount of personal information that we wouldn't necessarily feel comfortable sharing with others. 

We feel safe sharing our deepest dreams, desires, fears, past histories, traumas, and goals for the future. Generally, this is a reciprocal and gradual process.

While the display of care can differ from one person to the next (as a function of communication style or differing displays of affection, for instance), intimate partners tend to display genuine, selfless care for each other.

Trust

Trust is the confidence that we place in another human being to act in a way of honor and fairness that is of benefit to us, or at the very least, that our partner will not cause us purposeful harm.

Healthy intimate relationships involve partners who are mutually responsive to each other's needs. This means recognizing, understanding, and supporting each other, both in times of pain (e.g., losing a parent or a job) and gain (e.g., getting a promotion, announcing a pregnancy). 

After a certain point within a healthy intimate relationship, each partner recognizes a close connection and changes his or her view from "me" to "we." 

There is a mutual choice for wanting the relationship to continue indefinitely.

It allows for trust to continue to deepen, common knowledge to further be shared, mutuality to envelop, care to be shown, and continual effort be put into responsiveness and interdependence for both partners.

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Resolving Conflicts

Honest and authentic couples accept that there will be disagreement and know that, worked through successfully, it can add interest and intrigue to a relationship. They also know that unresolved repeated conflicts can threaten and ultimately damage relationships.

They focus on understanding why they disagreed and how to better handle it, instead of seeking to be right. 

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IDEAS

It's good to be honest about what you need or want from your partner after you open up.

Let them know that you do not need to be fixed. The purpose is to connect.

  • Know what you like and what matters to you
  • Don't be afraid to ask for what you want
  • Spend time with friends and family
  • Continue pursuing your personal goals
  • Be mindful of your values
  • Make time for hobbies and interests
  • Don't be afraid to say "no"
  • Don't keep yourself small or hidden to please others

Allowing your partner room and opportunity to do these same things will be the key to establishing a healthy, interdependent relationship.

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