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The one phrase that can transform your effectiveness at work

Corporate Speak

Corporate Speak

Words matter in the office and many of our verbal habits are not suitable in a professional environment and end up undermining our credibility and perception.

What we say and not say ends up weakening or strengthening our work relationships, team effectiveness and our communication with clients and bosses.

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The one phrase that can transform your effectiveness at work

The one phrase that can transform your effectiveness at work

https://www.fastcompany.com/90519278/the-one-phrase-that-can-transform-your-effectiveness-at-work

fastcompany.com

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Key Ideas

Corporate Speak

Words matter in the office and many of our verbal habits are not suitable in a professional environment and end up undermining our credibility and perception.

What we say and not say ends up weakening or strengthening our work relationships, team effectiveness and our communication with clients and bosses.

"Tell Me"

  • A neutral, effective and powerful phrase that one can use in any professional setting politely, is ‘Tell Me’.
  • It is a doorway question and other people end up providing valuable information, including their needs, wants and views. This phrase, coupled with good listening skills is a magic bullet in any conversation.
  • The person who opens up to you is your friend and makes your work easier. The phrase ‘Tell Me’ opens up the other person promptly.

SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:

Challenges To Listening
  • We have many things screaming for our attention every minute of the day and we often trick ourselves into believing they’re more important than a conversation unfolding right in front o...
The Importance Of Proper Listening

With proper listening you’ll have a crystal clear understanding of the conversation and demonstrate to speakers that you’re invested in what they have to say.

Being a good listener is one of the most potent things you can do to increase your influence and likeability. It is also one of the top skills employers seek in potential and current employees, and it’s correlated with perceived ability to lead.

How To Be A Better Listener
  1. Push other activities from your mind, and be present in the discussion. This tells the other person that you’re ready for the conversation.
  2. Keep a neutral expression that simply says, “I’m listening.” We tend to physically react to what we hear and it disrupts our ability to listen and the other person’s ability to be heard. 
  3. Offer uninterrupted speaking time. Well-intended or not, interruptions makes effective communication impossible. 
  4. Repeat back succinctly and ask validating questions to make sure you heard the speaker correctly.
Managing Your Boss
Managing Your Boss

Managing one’s boss can be a challenge, and most people have problems and frustrations with their superiors.

Working optimally with your boss means trying to produce the best possible r...

Talk About Priorities

Try connecting with your manager on a regular basis, clearing the work goals and priorities of the coming weeks or months.

Ensure that this line of communication is open so that there is clarity on both sides.

Regular Touchpoints

Just like setting priorities, there has to be a regular touchpoint system established, for checking in and getting queries solved.

Maintaining regularity of the meeting is imperative, though there are bound to be cancellations due to other priorities of your boss. It helps to take this into account and pushing for the meeting nonetheless.

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The signs of burnout
  • You dread going to work in the morning.
  • You show up late or find reasons to leave early.
  • You feel bored or don’t want to engage with the work when you’re there.
  • You’re ...
Find friends outside of work

If your only friends are your friends at work, it'll be more challenging to avoid work on evenings and weekends. If you do have coworkers as close friends, consider setting some boundaries around work talk.

Try to avoid getting drawn into office drama, as it will increase the time you spend talking and thinking about work.

Speak up

Speak up when your workload is too much. Tell your boss if you are stretched too thin or when you regularly work too many hours. Talk about what you can reasonably get done in a week.

Also, don't say yes to everything. If you have a hard time saying no, don't respond immediately. Instead say, "Let me get back to you", or, "Let me think about that."

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Weak Words Used Often

Every word you use while working expresses something about your personal brand, your confidence, state of mind, authority and knowledge. The verbs that we put in sentences are key to our ima...

'Think'

We use "I think: often while at work, but it's a dysfunctional addition to a start of a sentence, that while ok to use occasionally in trivial situations, is to be avoided in meetings or one-on-ones. 

Try replacing it with "I'm confident".

'Need'

When we use "I need" at the start of a sentence it sounds like pleading rather than empowered. It makes us sound needy.

Swap "I need" with "Please" to sound polite and confident.

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5 Steps for Effective Crisis Negotiation
  • Prepare for crisis: Good crisis-management plans predict and set mechanisms to deal with and minimize the effects of disputes.
  • Establish ground...
Characteristics of Crisis Negotiation
  • High stakes, including communication towards conflict resolution.
  • Unpredictable.
  • Heightened negative emotions, often leading to conflict escalation.
  • Multiple parties and teams are involved.
A Zen Parable
There was a man riding on a horse. When a man walking on the road asks him where he is going, the rider replies, “Why are you asking me? You should ask the horse.”

The ho...

Emotional Intelligence

The ability to monitor one's own and others' feelings and emotions to discriminate among them and to use this information to guide one's thinking and actions. -Salovey and Mayer (1990)

Emotional Mastery

It manifests itself in the kind of statements we make about ourselves, in relation to our emotional skills and success.

Qualities such as confidence, awareness and optimism, come under the umbrella of emotional intelligence. 

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Negotiation

... is a key life skill, an inherently interpersonal activity that requires a good understanding of human psyche, and it is vital to your success.

Negotiator perform 2 cognitive tasks:
  1. Judgement: Evaluate the content of the available options for its fairness.
  2. Choice: Determine which available option is preferred.
Use a Red Herring

Instead of making one single offer, try offering 3 possible scenarios:

  1.  Something that works for you but can be very expensive for the other party. A win-lose.
  2.  The red herring. Something that is a lose-lose for both parties. An option through which no one wins.
  3. Something that is a middle ground and a win-win for both.
Social psychology shows when you present  more options (the red herring), the other party will rarely decline all the options.

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Crises Can Confuse Communication

Failing in communication can have a big impact during a crisis. Sometimes things that are transparent to one party may be interpreted differently by another. Therefore, choosing certain words ...

Talking vs Speaking

During a crisis, using the word "talk" to begin a conversation, "Can we talk about how you are?" often gets a negative response. The reason is that we place little value on "talk." Talk is cheap or meaningless. However, substituting the word with "speak", seems to have better results.

"Talk" is loaded with context that makes it fruitless in these scenarios, while the word "speak" is free from those associations.

Being Willing

The principles for a positive and constructive discussion are framing your conversation in positivity.

By framing conversations to focus on the positive, one can move a problem forward.

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The fear of getting out of your comfort zone
The fear of getting out of your comfort zone

We are all afraid of new experiences, especially of the ones that require us to leave the safety of our comfort zone.

The way we react whenever this occurs has a big influence on how w...

Managing your mindset

There are two types of mindset: fixed and growth.

The first one can be met at individuals who believe that both success and failure are based mainly on innate abilities, which cannot be changed throughout one's lifetime, while the second mindset describes a person who is aware of the changes and improvements that the personal actions can bring.

What shapes our mindsets

Our mindset is said to be shaped by previous experiences as well as by a reward-based learning system.

Getting the necessary motivation while facing new challenges with a positive mindset can truly change your experience.

one more idea

How you speak to yourself

It directly influences how you experience things in life.

Our words play an important part in shaping our existence, so if your internal self-talk is negative, your external exper...

Words and emotions

The words we attach to our experience become our experience. 

Words have a biochemical effect on the body. For example, if you use a word like “devastated,” you’re going to produce a very different biochemical effect than if you say, “I’m a bit disappointed.

Start with a small shift

Replace just one word that will transform the way you experience something “negative.” This is how you create a choice instead of a habitual reaction.

These small changes in your vocabulary give you the power to change your experiences in life by lowering the intensity of negative emotions to the point where they no longer control you.