Happy people look after their relationships

• They spend money on others. One reason is that it creates social connections.
• They celebrate other people's success through "active and constructive" responding.
• They treat everyone with respect and kindness. Kindness, like happiness, is contagious.
• They're proactive about relationships. They work on maintaining their relationships.
• They express gratitude. It improves mood and energy and decreases anxiety.
• They engage in deep, meaningful conversations.

• They're optimistic. Bad things happen to all of us. Happy people don't complain, whine or let pessimism become a self-fulling prophecy.
• They view problems as challenges. They focus on solutions to the problem and reflect on what they're grateful for.

National surveys find that when someone claims to have 5 or more friends with whom they can discuss important problems, they are 60 percent more likely to say that they are ‘very happy’.
Excerpt from the book Finding Flow.

True friends really are worth their weight in gold. Check in regularly with close friends (around every two weeks).

Self-esteem is good for confidence, but self-esteem that is bound to external success can be quite fickle. 

Think of yourself less and avoid the trap of tying your self-worth to external signals.

Time spent making friends has a higher happiness Return on Investment than time spent making money.

Also, introduce friends to friends. Friends becoming happy increases your chance of happiness by 45%. Keeping the network happy protects you against unhappiness.

A few studies looked at the genetic similarity between friends and found that on a very deep level you resemble your friends genetically. 

What this means is that, basically, your friends are kin that you choose.

In order to be happy, you must first train your brain to perceive the good that happens to you.

One way to do this is by writing down three good experiences you live on a daily basis: appreciation comes from within, just like happiness.

While comparing yourself to others might not be extremely helpful, comparing yourself to people who are in a less good position than you might actually lead to you feeling better.

So, if you really feel this need, try not comparing yourself but to the ones in an inferior position.

Meditation improves your quality of life and boosts your immune system.

Research showed that meditation decreases anger and improves sleep, even among prison inmates.

People with strong faith release control of their struggles and worries to a higher power, which helps to relieve anxiety and stress.

Religious groups also offer a strong source of community and friendships, which is critical for health and happiness.

• They surround themselves with other happy people.
• They cultivate resilience.
• They appreciate simple pleasures.
• They devote some of their time to giving.
• They get immersed in activities that bring joy.
• They nix the small talk for deeper conversations. 
• They make a point to listen. 
• They look on the bright side.
• They make exercise a priority.
• They listen to good music.
• They spend time in nature.
• They laugh a lot.

Once you realize that happiness is predominantly an internal process, you will gradually understand that happiness is also a choice, and you will be able to transcend the limits of what it is that makes you happy.

Beliefs about events do. Bad feelings are caused by irrational beliefs, so if you’re feeling negative emotions, focus on the belief you hold about what happens. 

For stoics there is no good or bad, there’s only perception. And you control perception. 

Ignore the rest. We worry about things that we have no control over. But worrying never fixed anything. 

The stoics are saying that if you focus your energy on what you can change, you’re going to be a lot more productive and effective. 

Happiness seekers have to go beyond the notions of good or bad and learn to accept things as they are.

A mature approach to happiness is to focus less on the circumstances that make people happy, and more on how people can achieve happiness in uncertain and insecure conditions too.

Regardless of our external circumstances, we live in a constant state of mild-but-not-fully-satisfying happiness. Things are pretty much always fine. But they could also always be better. And that's why most of us live most of our lives constantly chasing our imagined "better".

It's the constant chasing of pleasure. 

People who are constantly striving for a “better life” end up expending a ton of effort only to end up in the same place.