There is a false understanding that a happy life means you are happy all the time. However, a part of a happy life is learning to embrace painful emotions.

Pursuing happiness

When you put pressure on a system, it grows stronger. For example, our muscular system. When we go to the gym and lift weights, we put pressure on our muscles and it grows stronger.  This is known as antifragility. On a psychological level, it is called post-traumatic growth, or PTG. Where post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is about breaking down, PTG is about growing stronger because of pressure or stress.

Antifragility

We know that happiness is a good thing, but we also know from research that people who pursue happiness directly end up unhappy and are more likely to experience depression.
The way to find happiness is to pursue it indirectly. Using the SPIRE model can trigger the antifragile system.
SPIRE stands for:
<ul>
<li>Spiritual wellbeing</li>
<li>Physical wellbeing</li>
<li>Intellectual wellbeing</li>
<li>Relational wellbeing</li>
<li>Emotional wellbeing.</li>
</ul>

The science of happiness

<ul><li>Spirituality is about finding a sense of meaning in life. When you wake up with a purpose, you're more likely to overcome difficulties.</li><li>Physical wellbeing. Stress can be seen as a silent killer. However, the real problem is lacking recovery. Almost 50% of employees don't use up their vacation time.</li><li>Intellectual wellbeing. People who are curious and deeply engaged with material live longer. It can be text, a work of art, nature.</li><li>Relational wellbeing has to do with spending quality time with people we care about.</li><li>Emotional wellbeing can be summed up as showing gratitude.</li></ul>

The SPIRE model

Don’t chase happiness. Become antifragile, with Tal Ben-Shahar Subscribe to Big Think on YouTube ►► https://www.youtube.com/c/bigthink Up next ►► The science of happiness, motivation, and meaning | Dan Ariely https://youtu.be/6yQiBT_W2VA Antifragility is the idea of putting pressure on a system, or human, the system or human actually grows bigger and stronger. Antifragile systems are all around us. One example of this is our muscular system. We go to the gym to lift weights. By doing so we are putting pressure on our system to help it grow stronger. The human body is an antifragile system. From a psychological perspective, antifragility comes in the form of PTG, or post-traumatic growth. After we experience a stressful event, we learn and grow to become more resilient. To learn even more from the world's biggest thinkers, get Big Think+ for your business: https://bigthink.com/plus/ Read the video transcript: https://bigthink.com/videos/happiness/ ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- About Tal Ben-Shahar: Dr. Tal Ben-Shahar is an internationally renowned teacher and author in the fields of happiness and leadership. After graduating from Harvard with a BA in Philosophy and Psychology and a PhD in Organizational Behavior, Tal taught two of the most popular courses in Harvard’s history: Positive Psychology and The Psychology of Leadership. He then taught Happiness Studies at Columbia University. A prolific writer, Tal's books have appeared on best-sellers lists around the world and have been translated into more than 30 languages. Tal Ben-Shahar consults and lectures to executives in multinational corporations, educational institutions, and the general public. Topics include leadership, education, ethics, happiness, self-esteem, resilience, goal setting and mindfulness. Dr. Tal Ben-Shahar is also the co-founder of the Happiness Studies Academy. Learn more here: https://www.happinessstudies.academy/ Tal is an avid sportsman and a certified yoga instructor whose work bridges Eastern and Western traditions, ancient wisdom and modern technology, science and art. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Read more of our stories on happiness: Epicurus and the atheist’s guide to happiness ►►https://bigthink.com/thinking/epicureanism-greek-philosophy-atheists-happiness/ The meaning of happiness, according to a baker in ancient Pompeii ►► https://bigthink.com/the-past/ancient-rome-happiness/ How to avoid “toxic positivity” and take the less direct route to happiness ►► https://bigthink.com/neuropsych/avoid-toxic-positivity/ ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- About Big Think | Smarter Faster™ ► Big Think The leading source of expert-driven, educational content. With thousands of videos, featuring experts ranging from Bill Clinton to Bill Nye, Big Think helps you get smarter, faster by exploring the big ideas and core skills that define knowledge in the 21st century. ► Big Think+ Make your business smarter, faster: https://bigthink.com/plus/ ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Want more Big Think? ► Daily editorial features: https://bigthink.com/popular/ ► Get the best of Big Think right to your inbox: https://bigthink.com/st/newsletter ► Facebook: https://bigth.ink/facebook ► Instagram: https://bigth.ink/Instagram ► Twitter: https://bigth.ink/twitter

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Don’t chase happiness. Become antifragile, with Tal Ben-Shahar
Subscribe to Big Think on YouTube ►► https://www.youtube.com/c/bigthink
Up next ►► The science of happiness, motivation, and meaning | Dan Ariely https://youtu.be/6yQiBT_W2VA 

Antifragility is the idea of putting pressure on a system, or human, the system or human actually grows bigger and stronger. 

Antifragile systems are all around us. One example of this is our muscular system. We go to the gym to lift weights. By doing so we are putting pressure on our system to help it grow stronger. The human body is an antifragile system. 

From a psychological perspective, antifragility comes in the form of PTG, or post-traumatic growth. After we experience a stressful event, we learn and grow to become more resilient. 

To learn even more from the world's biggest thinkers, get Big Think+ for your business: https://bigthink.com/plus/ 

Read the video transcript: https://bigthink.com/videos/happiness/

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

About Tal Ben-Shahar:
Dr. Tal Ben-Shahar is an internationally renowned teacher and author in the fields of happiness and leadership. After graduating from Harvard with a BA in Philosophy and Psychology and a PhD in Organizational Behavior, Tal taught two of the most popular courses in Harvard’s history: Positive Psychology and The Psychology of Leadership. He then taught Happiness Studies at Columbia University. A prolific writer, Tal's books have appeared on best-sellers lists around the world and have been translated into more than 30 languages.

Tal Ben-Shahar consults and lectures to executives in multinational corporations, educational institutions, and the general public. Topics include leadership, education, ethics, happiness, self-esteem, resilience, goal setting and mindfulness. Dr. Tal Ben-Shahar is also the co-founder of the Happiness Studies Academy. Learn more here: https://www.happinessstudies.academy/

Tal is an avid sportsman and a certified yoga instructor whose work bridges Eastern and Western traditions, ancient wisdom and modern technology, science and art.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

Read more of our stories on happiness: 
Epicurus and the atheist’s guide to happiness
►►https://bigthink.com/thinking/epicureanism-greek-philosophy-atheists-happiness/ 
The meaning of happiness, according to a baker in ancient Pompeii
►► https://bigthink.com/the-past/ancient-rome-happiness/ 
How to avoid “toxic positivity” and take the less direct route to happiness
 ►► https://bigthink.com/neuropsych/avoid-toxic-positivity/ 

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

About Big Think | Smarter Faster™
► Big Think 
The leading source of expert-driven, educational content. With thousands of videos, featuring experts ranging from Bill Clinton to Bill Nye, Big Think helps you get smarter, faster by exploring the big ideas and core skills that define knowledge in the 21st century. 
► Big Think+
Make your business smarter, faster: https://bigthink.com/plus/

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Don’t chase happiness. Become antifragile | Tal Ben-Shahar | Big Think

Learning is not as easy as owning a device, internet connection and a page full of articles and videos. Without a proper strategy, you may know isolated facts about everything, but it won't positively contribute to your future development. Understanding the seven mental models for learning can help to gain knowledge coherently.

Understanding mental models

We think we know much more than we really do. Warren Buffett and Charlie Munger developed the Circle of Competence. This mental model helps define what you know and what your limitations are. It enables you to avoid making decisions about subjects you don't fully understand.

Circle of Competence

The purpose of the thought experiment is to delve deeper into a given field to improve your knowledge, uncover what you don't know, and strengthen your understanding of the world. For example, a madman has tied 5 innocent people to a trolley track. An empty trolley car is fastly approaching the people. You can pull a lever and divert the trolley to another track, but there is 1 person tied to the other track. What would you do? The idea is to uncover what you actively think about the situation.

Thought experiment

This mental model explains that when we have two explanations for the same thing, we should prefer the simpler explanation. For example, when you're learning how to operate a complicated machine or reading a book in a field where you are a beginner, find the simpler explanation to absorb the material and start executing quickly.

Occam’s Razor

The availability heuristic states that we make decisions and form conclusions based on the most recent information we gathered. For example, if everybody starts investing in an "innovative" fund, you might do it yourself because of everything you've recently heard. But you may fail to ask critical questions and make proper calculations. This is also important as it shows that what you see is not everything that is available. The best-selling books are the most available, but there are also others that might be better and can teach us more.

Availability heuristic

Hindsight bias is when we see past events as being predictable. But that is because we now know what happened. When you give feedback to a person about something he did, you know the facts. That means how you frame your criticism can be distorted. You might have done the same thing if you were in his position at the time. When you create a change in your organisation that has a positive outcome, you may say you knew it all along. But in the long run, we start to think our predictions are perfect, and we may think we don't need to learn more.

Hindsight bias

Common knowledge tries to describe the things everyone knows. For example, knowledge about money, that our planet circles around the sun, that 1 + 1 = 2. However, common knowledge won't get you far in life. When you want to succeed in life, you want to stand out because you compete against thousands of others. Outlining the common knowledge in your field and learning extra things will help you to seem unique and desirable.

Common knowledge

The Feynman learning technique is not a mental model but a way to approach a subject to learn it faster and better. <ul><li>Pretend you're teaching a concept to a child. Write down in simple terms everything you know about the subject.</li><li>Identify the gaps. Go over what you've written down and see how you can improve it. What's missing or unclear.</li><li>Organise and simplify. Create a better way to explain the concept.</li><li>Transmit. Communicate your idea to someone to get feedback.</li></ul>

The Feynman learning technique

The mental models for learning are your weapons to help you understand more than the basics.

What better way to learn than to learn about learning? These mental models for learning will help you stay curious and progressing.

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Habits

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Learning & Education

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Problem Solving

7 Mental Models for Learning To Understand More Than The bare Minimum

Self-Confidence means trusting in your own judgement, capacities and abilities. It's about valuing yourself and feeling worthy, regardless of any imperfections or what others may believe about you.self confidence is a vital in almost every aspect of our lives, yet many people struggle to find it. people who lack self-confidence are less likely to achieve the success that could give them more confidenceHere are some ways to build your confidence

What Is Self-Confidence 

To develop and improve your self-esteem, aim to develop good habits and break bad ones. Regular exercise and a healthy diet can dramatically improve your physical and mental health. Working on your personal branding  can also help.

1.Build Confident Habits

Your self confidence will increase when you are able to say "i can do this. you"ll have identified things that you're good at,.

2.Review Past Achievements 

Setting and achieving goals and seeing how far you've come are key ways to develop self confidence.When you've identified the major goals you want to achieve, clarify the first step you need to take. Make sure that they are small steps, taking no longer than an hour to do. This will get the ball rolling and improve your confidence through  the achievement of appropriate goals.

Set Confidence-Boosting Goals

Developing the skills for a fabulous career isn’t just a nice idea. It’s the best possible path to success. Mind Tools is a comprehensive toolkit, jam-packed with all the learning resources you need to forge a prosperous career, and achieve that all-important work–life balance.

How to Build Self-Confidence

Being late can send a stressful ripple through an entire day — both yours and someone else's — and no matter what kind of Lateness Olympic events you're competing in, we have some news for you: Striving to be on time is the only real way to stop being late. (Unfortunately, nobody will give you a medal for this!)

Always Late!

Think of being on time as a way of showing respect.We are interacting with not only others, but also ourselves. Being on time shows respect for the person you're meeting with and it means you're showing up for yourself.

Being On Time Is Important

If you're chronically late, one thing you can do to help yourself be more punctual is to plan ahead. Set yourself up for success by doing everything you can to ease that transition. So pick out your outfit, pack your bag, look up directions, find your good shoes and get your travel mug ready all before you need to leave.

Planning Ahead

Another tip is to work backward from when you need to be somewhere to give yourself time for the transition. How much travel time it'll take to get to the place from the moment you leave your home or place of work?There's a lot of steps that people just don't consider. So if you need to fight traffic or buy a metro card, or pick up flowers or print something, leave time for that stuff.

Working Backwards

Arriving somewhere early can make us super-anxious. Sitting with this anxiety is actually quite okay. For folks who are consistently late, try to shift your relationship with time so that the 10 or 15 minutes before the start of the meeting/dinner/appointment can be a time to gather your thoughts.

Arriving Early

What could be the downside of sitting and collecting your thoughts for 10 minutes?Try to tell yourself that you will in fact find something to do with your hands and that those 10 minutes that you're waiting aren't actually an entire hour, no matter how much it feels like it is. Think of it as a moment to catch your breath and give yourself a second to get settled.

How To Handle Your Emotions If You Are Early

Everyone is late sometimes. Some people even invent Olympic events for all the ways that they are able to be late. Advice for folks who look at their watch and know the chances are good that they're going for gold: Let folks know as soon as you can. If you know you're going to be late to something, the very best thing you can do is communicate right away. It's not, thinking about it and then calling or texting 30 minutes later. It means right at that moment.

No Excuses!

People are late for lots of reasons — being overly optimistic, not accurately gauging how much time it takes to actually get somewhere, even being afraid of being early. Time management coach Rashelle Isip shares some tactics that can help you embrace punctuality and avoid that awkward apology for being tardy ... again.

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Productivity

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Time Management

5 tips to help you stop being so late (or at least make you more honest about it) : Life Kit

There's endless pressure from all sides: our culture, the media, your loved ones all purport the need to chase an extraordinary standard in every aspect of life.
We're urged to travel the world, while simultaneously working our way to professional success – all to get married to the perfect partner, buy a home and raise kids.

The Race

A picture-perfect adulthood isn't realistic. The goal posts will keep moving and we're never without the next best thing we should be doing on the path to growing into our next best selves.
It's a challenge not to feel as though finding yourself has been turned into a competitive sport. When the pursuit of extraordinary is the status quo, that's a game set up for many to lose. The solution is to turn away from constant comparison and instead focus on finding fulfillment and identity on your own terms.

Finding Fulfilment In Your Own Terms

What we might find is that the big questions: 'What matters to me? Who am I going to be in the world?' – have ordinary answers. Maybe it's embracing the pursuit of those answers that leads us to growth and shows us who we can grow into.
To rework your perception of the perfect life, it's important to understand and acknowledge the privilege of being able to pick and choose your plans for the future in the first place. Leaving your job to "follow your dreams" or moving to a new state aren't opportunities available for everyone.

Know Thyself

An ordinary life isn't something to be ashamed of. Constant comparison is ruining our health and making us live in chronic anxiety.
We're all impacted in both big and small ways by our own social context, so the road and the finish line will look different for everyone. But embracing your personal ordinariness doesn't mean you have to think small.

Embracing Ordinariness

The problem with finding your passion, or your dream job is that this kind of insidious mentality can actually keep us from critiquing the labor structure that we're existing in.
Our passion and dream job can actually prevent us from pushing for better work-life balance or policies that would improve our work life and our overall health and wellbeing, and critiquing the larger systems of labor that keep us working.

Finding Your Passion: The Myth of a Dream Job

One of those reasons is the common trope that moving to a new city to start over will jumpstart an extraordinary life.
This notion can be incredibly disenfranchising for people who don't have the bandwidth or resources to move to a place to see what happens. When you're feeling unsettled or alone, establish routines that give you a sense of stability and keep open lines of communication with your loved ones.

The Perfect Next Place

A partnership may enrich your life, but If romance doesn't fit right now, nothing is wrong with you, and you have a choice either way.
No matter where your relationships fall between those two poles, it's important to remember that this time of your life is formative. Each relationship can teach us how to love someone, how to be intimate with someone, what we want out of a partner. Or, on the more negative side, can teach us about what we don't want, or the danger of not exercising our own agency with a partner.

Choosing Yourself In Love

We're going to find ways to embrace our most ordinary selves. That can be as simple as logging off your computer 15 minutes early, calling a friend even if you still have items on your to-do list or being kind to yourself when you fall short of your own expectations.
Being able to renegotiate what matters to you, solve problems, and learn to trust yourself are ordinary things with remarkable power.

The Power of Everyday Ordinary Life

Live an ordinary life to be extraordinary.

For those in emerging adulthood, there's endless pressure from all sides to chase an extraordinary standard in every aspect of life. But writer Rainesford Stauffer says the so-called milestones are more unrealistic than ever. Now's the time for creativity and carving your own path — and she's got some tips from her book, An Ordinary Age, to get you started.

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Career

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Love & Relationships

'Extraordinary' is overrated. Here's how to embrace the power of an ordinary life : Life Kit

Art isn’t a knock-knock joke, and squinting at an exhibit isn’t going to elicit a punch line. Everyone — artists and viewers alike — will have a unique experience. As in the rest of life, there will be times when you can’t relate to the artist, or even understand where they're coming from. Accept that, and move on. Don’t write off art, an entire genre, or even a particular work just because it doesn’t agree with you at the moment. As you go through life, your tastes will change.

1. Stop Trying to “Get It.”

The best way to see art is to see it alone. Don’t be swayed by your peers or even your teachers. Remember that your unique experiences leading up to the moment you encounter a work of art will shape your appreciation of it, as will all the experiences that follow. Like what you like, even if you're not sure why, or can't put the reason to words.

2. Don't Be Afraid To Like Something.

Anything within the context of art is art. It might make you roll your eyes to think about a highly paid artist flinging paint at a canvas like a toddler. But much as John Cage taught us the difference between noise and sound, seeing art that you disagree with can challenge your notions, or help you suss out your beliefs.

3. Consider More Things As Art.

Creativity is one of the many benefits of human intelligence. Our ability to make art and think critically about it separate us from dolphins and monkeys. I don’t care what you majored in, or how your figure drawings (or stick figures) always come out. Every human being has artistic ability. Trust in this.

4. Trust Your Instincts.

Once you’re comfortable with allowing yourself to feel something about art, take it to the next level. Try to go beyond considering whether art is cool or offensive, and find a personal connection to the work. Even if you're relating art to something as simple what you ate for breakfast, it’s a step in the right direction.

5. Make a Connection. 

Assuming you have the aforementioned human intelligence, then you also have artistic ability. Anything that you consider to be art will be. Walk backward through a crosswalk. Take a photo. Instagram it. Experiment. Cook an amazing meal (bonus points if you don’t look at a recipe). I guarantee you’ll feel better about art after exercising your right to create.

6. Make Your Own Art.

Most of us think that understanding art is too difficult ... But it's not that difficult.... So here are some ways by which we can understand art in a better way.... 

Human beings have been making and benefiting from art for longer than our recorded history. While contemporary art might seem exclusive or confusing, all viewers have to do is meet the artist halfway. Here are six easy steps to help you appreciate…

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Fashion & Beauty

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Creativity

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Society, Arts & Culture

How to Understand Art in 6 Easy Steps

"Success is often achieved by those who don't know that failure is inevitable." --

"It's not knowing what to do, it's doing what you know." --

"Focus on being productive instead of busy." --

"The key is not to prioritize what's on your schedule, but to schedule your priorities." --

"Ordinary people think merely of spending time, great people think of using it." --

"The best way out is always through." --

Hello beautiful people i am sharing some quotes maybe helpful for you as per your situation please try and let me know if you get that

Gain some inspiration for the new year with these motivational quotes.

100 Powerful Quotes That Will Boost Your Productivity

" I will [behaviour] at[time] in [ location]. "

<ul><li>start small</li><li>start easy</li><li>start now</li></ul>

optimize for the start line, not the finish line

" well begun is half done "

Waste no more time arguing what a good man should be. Be one!If it ain't right don't do it, If it ain't true don't say it.You could leave life right now. Let that determine what you do and say and think.Just that you do the right thing. The rest doesn't matter.Love everything that happens, no matter good or bad.The obstacle is the way.

Stoicism

I want a good start, a good energy, a good trust, a good company, a good question.

How to start doing?

Productivity Hack

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Entrepreneurship

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Startups

How I Used The Pandemic To Finally Put an End To My Procrastination (And How You Can Do The Same in 2022) - Virtue Map

When you use your <a href="https://audiobookmc.blogspot.com/2022/02/8-benefits-of-writing-journal.html">journal</a> to write down your goals, you can keep better track of your intentions. <a href="https://audiobookmc.blogspot.com/2022/01/8-tips-to-avoid-procrastination.html">This will help you stay accountable and serve as a reminder of what you need to do to accomplish them</a>. Be sure to get specific.

1. Achieve goals:

If you make <a href="https://audiobookmc.blogspot.com/2022/02/8-benefits-of-writing-journal.html">journaling</a> a regular habit, you can see how much progress or growth you’ve made by revisiting previous entries.

2. Track progress and growth:

Seeing your progress can also give you a serious <a href="https://audiobookmc.blogspot.com/2021/07/how-to-be-more-confident.html">confidence</a> boost. You can feel proud looking back at the challenges you faced and seeing how far you’ve come.

3. Gain self-confidence:

Writing, like anything, improves with practice. When you <a href="https://audiobookmc.blogspot.com/2022/02/8-benefits-of-writing-journal.html">journal</a> every day, you’re practicing the art of writing. And if you use a journal to express your thoughts and ideas, it’ll help improve your overall communication skills.

4. Improve writing and communication skills:

Sometimes negative thoughts and emotions can run on a loop in our heads. This can be stressful when you’re dealing with a challenging situation — it can even make your present situation feel worse. But if you stop and put your emotions down on paper, it can help you release negative thoughts from your mind. As you write, you may even come up with a solution you hadn’t thought of before.

5. Reduce stress and anxiety:

Leonardo da Vinci drew some incredible invention ideas in his <a href="https://audiobookmc.blogspot.com/2022/02/8-benefits-of-writing-journal.html">journals</a>. Like him, you can also use your journaling time to brainstorm or let your imagination run wild. The inspiration that may pop up while you’re writing or sketching might even surprise you.

6. Find inspiration:

The <a href="https://audiobookmc.blogspot.com/2022/02/8-benefits-of-writing-journal.html">Journal</a> of Experimental Psychology published research that shows how writing your thoughts down can reduce intrusive thoughts about negative events and improve working memory.* Even the simple act of writing something down lets your brain know you want to remember it. That’s why note-taking is such an effective practice when learning something new.

7. Strengthen memory:

Writing a <a href="https://audiobookmc.blogspot.com/2022/02/8-benefits-of-writing-journal.html">journal</a> is a great way to unleash your creativity. Everyone has the potential to be creative, just that most of us haven't discovered it yet. Your <a href="https://audiobookmc.blogspot.com/2022/02/8-benefits-of-writing-journal.html">journal</a> is the best place to start exploring your inner creativity. Write down anything that comes to your mind. Let your imaginations run wild and record it in Journey.

8. Inspire creativity:

Because I have gone through this & started writing journaling in the last 2 months I have seen effective results from it so I wanted to share the information with all & try to add value to them...

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Mindfulness

8 Benefits of Writing Journal

Find  Self Improvement Tips - Curated from popular Books like Atomic Habits, 48 Rules of Power, Deep Work, Rich Dad Poor Dad and way more!