Virginia Hodges's Key Ideas from Self-Compassion
by Dr. Kristin Neff

1. Self-Kindness: be gentle and understanding with ourselves
2. Common Humanity: feeling connected with others
3. Mindfulness: hold our experience in balanced awareness

• Emotional resilience
• Higher self compassion leads to less feelings of anxiety and depression
• "Mindfulness allows us to see that our negative thoughts and emotions are just that—thoughts and emotions—not necessarily reality. They are therefore given less weight—they are observed, but not necessarily believed."

"Research shows that people with higher levels of self-compassion are significantly less likely to suppress unwanted thoughts and emotions than those who lack self-compassion. They’re more willing to experience their difficult feelings and to acknowledge that their emotions are valid and important."

"The beauty of self-compassion is that instead of replacing negative feelings with positive ones, new positive emotions are generated by embracing the negative ones. The positive emotions of care and connectedness are felt alongside our painful feelings."

Research on motivation consistently found that self-confidence directly impacts our abilities to reach our goals.

Self-criticism can harm abilities to do our best. When we put ourselves down, we lose faith in ourselves.

Self compassion is more effective a motivator than criticism because it comes from love, not fear.