Celeste Headlee: 10 ways to have a better conversation | TED - Deepstash
Celeste Headlee: 10 ways to have a better conversation | TED

Celeste Headlee: 10 ways to have a better conversation | TED

Curated from: TED

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CELESTE HEADLEE

There is no reason to show that you are paying attention when you are in fact... paying attention.

CELESTE HEADLEE

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1. Do Not Multitask

1. Do Not Multitask

Not just put down your phone, your car keys, or whatever that is in your hand.

But also be present, be in that moment. Be completely involved in the conversation.

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2. Dont Pontificate

You need to enter every conversation assuming that you have something to learn.

Always assume the other person knows something you don't. So try to listen and learn.

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CELESTE HEADLEE

If you want to state your opinion, without any opportunity for response, argument, pushback, or growth. Write a blog.

CELESTE HEADLEE

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BUDDHA

If your mouth is open, you are not learning.

BUDDHA

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3. Use Open Ended Questions

3. Use Open Ended Questions

Start your questions with who, what, when, where, why, or how.

Instead of asking "Was it scary?", ask "How did you feel?" or "How was it like?"

Let them describe it. They are the ones who know.

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4. Go With The Flow

In the middle of a conversation if you just remembered some exciting past event you want to share or you got a cool question you want to ask, let it be. Let them come, let them go.

First, be present and listen to the speaker. Then you may talk about whatever you recalled.

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5. If You Don't Know Something, Accept It

5. If You Don't Know Something, Accept It

It's okay to not know everything in the world. If you don't know something, say you don't know. Err on the side of caution.

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6. Don't Equate Your Experiences With Theirs

Every experience is unique and individual. Do not try to equate them with your experiences.

Try to listen to others instead of making the conversation about you.

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CELESTE HEADLEE

Conversations are not promotional activities. You don't have to show how smart, how cool, or how brave you are.

CELESTE HEADLEE

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7. Try Not To Repeat Yourself

Speak with clarity and intent. Do not go over the same things over and over.

This happens especially when you are talking about yourself or when you are trying to make a point, without even realizing it.

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8. Dont Fixate Too Much On The Details

8. Dont Fixate Too Much On The Details

People don't care about the exact date, the exact place, or the names that much. They care about you, they care about what you're like, what you have in common.

So forget the details. Leave them out.

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9. Listen

Try to understand what the person has to say. Be interested in others.

Listening takes effort and energy. But if you can't do that, you are just two people shouting barely related sentences in the same place.

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STEPHEN COVEY

Most of us don't listen with the intent to understand, we listen with the intent to reply.

STEPHEN COVEY

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10. Be Brief

Keep it short. Keep it simple. Cover all the main details. Talk with purpose, intent, and clarity.

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HER SISTER

A good conversation is like a miniskirt, short enough to retain interest but long enough to cover the subject.

HER SISTER

181

2.55K reads

IDEAS CURATED BY

rohitpatnaik

I read books and provide quick dense insightful points of the book. I also omit some points of a book if they are repetitive and are found in various other books. Hope you find it helpful. Cheers! Reach out to me on discord @rohitpatnaik

CURATOR'S NOTE

Do check out the full video.

Rohit Patnaik's ideas are part of this journey:

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