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The self of self-help books is adrift from social and economic facts | Psyche Ideas

https://psyche.co/ideas/the-self-of-self-help-books-is-adrift-from-social-and-economic-facts

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The self of self-help books is adrift from social and economic facts | Psyche Ideas
Self-help books are a broken parachute: to win friends and influence people, take advice from a social scientist instead

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Ontology

Ontology

This is a branch of philosophy that deals with the questions of being and identity.

Ontological psychologists and social scientists start with examining our self in social, political, economical, cultural and psychological terms, knowing the base value, before any self-help advice can be dispensed out by them.

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Self-help vs Social science

Self-help literature, like information, exists as raw, uncurated, unexamined information, while social science is like knowledge, beginning with the aggregated data and the processes of thinking, developed and updated over time.

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Myopic points of view

Many best seller self-help books like the much-celebrated How To Win Friends And Influence People by Dale Carnegie, written way back in 1936 provide a personal view of influencing and persuading others, which has later been proved to be ineffective.
This is because many of these books are detached from various social and economical facts, offering a myopic view of the world.

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The appeal of self-help

The packaging and tone of a self-help book help a lot towards its appeal to the general public, giving them a sense of personal control and a sense of excitement, making them take action.

The real value of the self-help book may be to energize the reader to take action, and not simply following the instructions of the book to the tee.

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SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:

Dale Carnegie’s advice to make people like you

  1. Become genuinely interested in other people.
  2. Smile.
  3. Remember names. 
  4. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
  5. Talk in terms of the ot...

Actively showing interest in other people

When people speak, the best responses are both active and constructiveengaged, enthusiastic, curious and has supportive nonverbal action. Ask questions. Be excited. Ask for details. Smile. Touch. Laugh.

It's a powerful technique - it makes you more liked and people more receptive to your requests.

Smiling does make you more attractive

And by smiling we influence others to smile. People judge things more positively while smiling, so our own smile can set off a chain reaction causing more positive encounters.

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Dale Carnegie

He is one of the most influential authors in the self-improvement industry, and the creator of the book  "How to Stop Worrying and Start Living", which deals with tactics for ...

"What's the worst that can happen?"

When worries overwhelm you:

  1. Ask yourself what's the worst that could possibly happen. 
  2. Prepare to accept the worst.
  3. Figure out how to improve upon the worst, should it come to pass.

Gathering facts objectively

  • You can pretend that you're gathering this data for someone else, so you're distancing yourself emotionally  from the process.
  • You can pretend that you're a lawyer who is preparing to argue the other side of the issue — so you gather all the facts against yourself. Write down the facts on both sides of the case and you'll generally get a clearer picture of the truth.

Reading Fiction

Reading Fiction
  • What may sound a bit counterintuitive, is that reading fiction can provide us with self-improvement benefits, even though the stuff we read would just be a figment of someon...

Developing Empathy Through Fiction

Imagining stories activates the particular regions inside our minds that facilitate better understanding of others and seeing our surroundings with a new perspective, equivalent to putting oneself in someone else's shoes.

When we read about a situation and how someone else is feeling, we create the feeling inside our minds.

Reading As A Form Of Meditation

With just six minutes of silent reading, a person can lower their heart rate and ease the tension in their muscles by about 68 percent.

Reading puts our mind in a low gear, resting its cognitive ‘chips’ and disengaging it from active duty for a while. Reading puts our mind into a light trance, a form of meditation, and has similar benefits like relaxation and a peaceful, calm feeling.