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The first step in forgiveness is to understand "why" someone acts the way they do. What are they trying to protect? What are they afraid of? What basic skills did they learn (or not learn) from their family of origin?
Understanding "why" breeds compassion and helps loosen the ties that bind us to blame.
Until we fully release our emotions, they continue to affect our present mindset.
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If you decide you are willing to forgive, find a good place and time to be alone with your thoughts.