How To Deal With Difficult People - Deepstash

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How To Deal With Difficult People

hackernoon.com

Defining difficult people

We are social creatures who desire validation. We feel good when others share our belief system. But we feel dejected when others do not value our inputs, crush our ideas, or ignore what we have to say.

These difficult people act in undesirable ways and give us permission to pass judgement...

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We view the world and the people in it from a specific paradigm.

How we relate to someone is driven by our personality, expectations, background, and experience. Why we find someone difficult is then a very personal affair.

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  • T - Tagging. We are quick to label others as needy, manipulative, fake, arrogant, but explain away our own selfish acts and believe we are better than others.
  • R - Righteous. When we find someone difficult, we start believing in t...

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“Never attribute to bad intentions that which is adequately explained by ignorance, incompetence, negligence, misunderstanding, laziness or other probable causes”

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When dealing with difficult people, the amygdala in the brain, responsible for processing emotions, perceives them as a threat. This triggers the fight-or-flight response.

We either try to fight the behavior or flee from the situation without solving the problem. The inter...

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  • Separate the person from the behavior. It will allow you to identify your own limits and find what aspect of a person's behavior troubles you. "I find you obnoxious" vs. "The idea you suggested does not consider..."
  • Widen your perspective....

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