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Most people are bad at arguing. These 2 techniques will make you better.

https://www.vox.com/2016/11/23/13708996/argue-better-science

vox.com

Most people are bad at arguing. These 2 techniques will make you better.
Anyone who has argued with an opinionated relative or friend about immigration or gun control knows it is often impossible to sway someone with strong views. That's in part because our brains work hard to ensure the integrity of our worldview: We seek out information to confirm what we already know, and are dismissive or avoidant of facts that are hostile to our core beliefs.

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Difficult to convince

Difficult to convince

It can feel impossible to persuade someone with strong views. This is in part because we look for information to confirm what we already know and avoid or dismiss facts that are opposed to our core beliefs.

However, it is not impossible to sway someone. 

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What resonates with your opponent

We all tend to overrate the power of arguments we find convincing, and wrongly think the other side will be converted. It is pointless to argue a point that your opponents have already dismissed.

The answer is not to simply expose people to another point of view. Find out what resonates with them. Frame your message with buzzwords that reflect their values.

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Use moral framing

To try and sway the other side, use their morals against them. People have stable morals that influence their worldview. 

However, reframing in terms of values might not turn your opponent's view, but can soften his stance and get him to listen to counterarguments.

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Listen

Your ideological opponents want to feel like they've been heard. The key is to let the opposition do most of the talking.

People learn lessons better when they come to the conclusion themselves. Listen to people, get them to think about their own experience, and highlight your common humanity. Letting them talk opens the door to reducing prejudice and changing opinions.

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Cherish your life

Cherish your life

Everybody is aware, in a certain measure, of the different truths life provides us with. One of them, which is also the scariest, is related to the fact that eventually, we all die. 

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Work hard, live longer

One of the biggest truths you will ever come to realize is that hard work, ambition and targets give actual meaning to your life. 

Furthermore, once you have given a purpose to your work, you will most certainly see that motivation goes a long way into making someone's life more interesting to live.

There is a limit to happiness

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