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3 Signs You're the Toxic Person in Your Workplace (and What to Do About It)
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Making everything about you
Everyone goes through tough times or phases. Perhaps you're going through a bad breakup or have insecurities about yourself and your talents.
When you're involved in a group discussion with your co-workers, try to listen more than talking. Recognize the desire to steer the conversation back to you. Instead, ask someone else a question that will add value to the discussion.
Being passive-aggressive
Passive aggressiveness involves giving backhanded compliments, ignoring a co-worker, or purposefully excluding someone.
Passive-aggressive behavior is a coping or defense mechanism. Toxic employees use this outlet when they feel threatened, jealous, or insecure.
Physical exercise can release anger. Fit in exercise before work. Also, take walks every few hours to get away from the computer screen.
Jealous of others' success
Jealousy is a common trait that can turn toxic at work. You might express jealousy upfront or through passive-aggressive behaviors.
At the heart of jealousy lies insecurity. To overcome this, stop comparing yourself with others. Instead, keep focused on your own goals. Obsessing about other people's achievements can distract you from your own successes.
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Influence is power
No matter who you are, where you work, or what your professional goals are, achieving more influence in the workplace is critical for success.
But gaining that influence, like learning...
Build Trust
Influence is most often and most easily carried through trust: only when a co-worker trusts you will he or she be open to your influence.
The easiest way to do that is to be honest, no matter what. State your opinions, disclose your apprehensions, and don't keep secrets.
Reliability Through Consistency
Inconsistency is the fastest way to ruin your reputation. Consistency, on the other hand, is slow but sure: if you execute your tasks effectively and on time, day after day, eventually people will come to rely on you.
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Maintain Physical Distance
The best way of avoiding workplace contagion by toxic workers is to minimize contact.
People are four times more likely to communicate regularly with individuals who are seated two met...
Slow the Rhythm
Slow the rhythm of your exchanges with toxic workers as much as possible. By doing so, you'll deny the abuser the positive reinforcement and pleasure they crave when they abuse others.
Reduce the frequency of communications. Limit meetings such that they are only scheduled on an as-needed basis. As well, when possible, minimize email communications and delay email response times.
Develop an Early Warning System
Oftentimes, an early warning system is best developed with the succor of a toxic worker's secretary or executive assistant.
Because these individuals are best suited to predict rash behavior and/or mood swings. If you're able to successfully enlist individuals in the know, they can be invaluable in terms of alerting you not only of an asshole's presence, but also of his/her daily levels of "asshole-ness."
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The Relationship Scorecard
This is when you and your partner continue to blame each other for past mistakes made in the relationship instead of solving the current problem.
Deal with issues individually unless they ...
Dropping “Hints”
It shows that you two are not comfortable communicating openly and clearly with one another.
State your feelings and desires openly. And make it clear that the other person is not necessarily responsible or obligated to them but that you’d love to have their support.
Holding the Relationship Hostage
For example, if someone feels like you’ve been cold to them, instead of saying, “I feel like you’re being cold sometimes,” they will say, “I can’t date someone who is cold to me."
It’s crucial for both people in a relationship to know that negative thoughts and feelings can be communicated safely to one another without it threatening the relationship itself.
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