3 Signs You're the Toxic Person in Your Workplace (and What to Do About It) - Deepstash

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3 Signs You're the Toxic Person in Your Workplace (and What to Do About It)

https://www.inc.com/john-boitnott/3-signs-youre-toxic-person-in-your-workplace-and-what-to-do-about-it.html

inc.com

3 Signs You're the Toxic Person in Your Workplace (and What to Do About It)
Almost every workplace has at least one toxic employee. You know the type -- always negative, tends to bully others, distracts much of the team ... the " bad apple" that ruins the barrel. But what if someone were to tell you that you were that person?

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Making everything about you

Everyone goes through tough times or phases. Perhaps you're going through a bad breakup or have insecurities about yourself and your talents.

When you're involved in a group discussion with your co-workers, try to listen more than talking. Recognize the desire to steer the conversation back to you. Instead, ask someone else a question that will add value to the discussion.

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Being passive-aggressive

Passive aggressiveness involves giving backhanded compliments, ignoring a co-worker, or purposefully excluding someone.

Passive-aggressive behavior is a coping or defense mechanism. Toxic employees use this outlet when they feel threatened, jealous, or insecure.

Physical exercise can release anger. Fit in exercise before work. Also, take walks every few hours to get away from the computer screen.

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Jealous of others' success

Jealousy is a common trait that can turn toxic at work. You might express jealousy upfront or through passive-aggressive behaviors.

At the heart of jealousy lies insecurity. To overcome this, stop comparing yourself with others. Instead, keep focused on your own goals. Obsessing about other people's achievements can distract you from your own successes.

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You can change

If you are the toxic person in your workplace, you can rectify the situation before your toxic tendencies ruin your career. 

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Build Trust

Influence is most often and most easily carried through trust: only when a co-worker trusts you will he or she be open to your influence.

The easiest way to do that is to be honest, no matter what. State your opinions, disclose your apprehensions, and don't keep secrets. 

Reliability Through Consistency

Inconsistency is the fastest way to ruin your reputation. Consistency, on the other hand, is slow but sure: if you execute your tasks effectively and on time, day after day, eventually people will come to rely on you.

Maintain Physical Distance

The best way of avoiding workplace contagion by toxic workers is to minimize contact.

People are four times more likely to communicate regularly with individuals who are seated two met...

Slow the Rhythm

Slow the rhythm of your exchanges with toxic workers as much as possible. By doing so, you'll deny the abuser the positive reinforcement and pleasure they crave when they abuse others.

Reduce the frequency of communications. Limit meetings such that they are only scheduled on an as-needed basis. As well, when possible, minimize email communications and delay email response times.

Develop an Early Warning System

Oftentimes, an early warning system is best developed with the succor of a toxic worker's secretary or executive assistant. 

Because these individuals are best suited to predict rash behavior and/or mood swings. If you're able to successfully enlist individuals in the know, they can be invaluable in terms of alerting you not only of an asshole's presence, but also of his/her daily levels of "asshole-ness."

Dropping “Hints”

It shows that you two are not comfortable communicating openly and clearly with one another. 

State your feelings and desires openly. And make it clear that the other person is not ne...

Holding the Relationship Hostage

For example, if someone feels like you’ve been cold to them, instead of saying, “I feel like you’re being cold sometimes,” they will say, “I can’t date someone who is cold to me." 

It’s crucial for both people in a relationship to know that negative thoughts and feelings can be communicated safely to one another without it threatening the relationship itself. 

Blaming Your Partner

... for your own emotions. This is a subtle form of selfishness and a classic example of the poor maintenance of personal boundaries. Take responsibility for your own emotions and expect your partner to be responsible for theirs.