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How To Stop Caring About What People Think & Do - Darius Foroux

Mission = Value + Vision

Mission = Value + Vision

Discovering your core values, and having a vision is key to finding your mission.
You have to know where you want to go (Vision) and create a road map that takes you there (Values). Having these foundational pillars in your life makes us less susceptible to what others think and do.

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How To Stop Caring About What People Think & Do - Darius Foroux

How To Stop Caring About What People Think & Do - Darius Foroux

https://dariusforoux.com/stop-caring/

dariusforoux.com

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Key Ideas

Belongingness

Humans have an inbuilt drive to belong and be accepted. This makes us care about what others think of us.

  • In the pre-historic times, human beings couldn't survive if they were not part of a group. This makes belongingness part of our genes, which shaped our natural selection.
  • In the modern age, as we get more social and mobile, it is no longer necessary to be part of a group, as it is not crucial to be accepted by everyone. It helps to know how to care less about what other people think or do.

Staying Clear of Imaginary Groups

Out of novelty and boredom, we started being part of 'imaginary' groups just because it is cool to do so. There are groups in social media, or in clubs/bars, in which people join due to desire to be accepted.

If we have our friends, family, a career and a few hobbies, we don't need to attach our identity to a group.

Mission = Value + Vision

Discovering your core values, and having a vision is key to finding your mission.
You have to know where you want to go (Vision) and create a road map that takes you there (Values). Having these foundational pillars in your life makes us less susceptible to what others think and do.

It's Ok To Disappoint Others

It's ok to disappoint others, instead of falling in the trap of doing obligatory and unnecessary work, as many kind and thoughtful people end up doing. It is ok to say NO to others, as the most important task you have is to live up to your core values and your mission.

If people are disappointed with you, it is a revelation that they are selfish, and are not concerned with the wellbeing of others.

Create Your Own Group

Create your own closely-knit group of true and authentic people in your family and close friends.

You need to stop bothering about or getting influenced by other people and realize that you don't need to be part of other groups.

EXPLORE MORE AROUND THESE TOPICS:

SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:

Extrapolating our thoughts

A few examples of how we extrapolate our exceptions all the time:

  • “House prices will probably keep increasing.”
  • “That person will never change.”
  • “My busi...
We’re fast thinkers

But that doesn’t mean we should follow through on every single thought that pops into our mind.

Every time you start thinking about future events or start making mental movies, keep count on a post-it note or a small piece of paper. Be aware of your thoughts. But don’t follow through.

Ryan Holiday
Ryan Holiday
“It takes skill and discipline to bat away the pests of bad perceptions, to separate reliable signals from deceptive ones, to filter out prejudice, expectation, and fear.”

one more idea

Leadership is about ownership

The most fundamental and important truth at the heart of Extreme Ownership: there are no bad teams, only bad leaders.” - Jocko Willink and Leif Babin, Extreme Ownership

Yo...

How to set the right example
  • Expect from others what you expect from yourself. Never ask for something you're not doing.
  • When things go wrong, try to stay calm. Life is nothing but a series of solved problems. 
  • When you screw up, admit it. There’s no place for your ego.
  • Be clear about your values and rules. People must take you seriously.
  • Respect others and don’t try to change them. It’s impossible to change people. You can only change yourself. 
Epictetus

“Wealth consists not in having great possessions, but in having few wants.”

Epictetus
Rules for de-cluttering life
  • Don't buy the stuff you can't afford.
  • Live below your means
  • Get rid of things when they take up the space you need. Donate or recycle them.