Villains and heroes actually have the exact same backstory. The villain story and the backstory of the hero are pain. So the difference between the villain and the hero is one thing: it's how they respond to pain. The villain says: “the world hurt me; I'm gonna hurt it back”. And the hero says: “the world hurt me; I'm not gonna let this happen to anyone else”.It's just literally how you decide to react to pain that causes you to be the villain or the hero.

Speaker: Donald Miller on The School of Greatness Podcast with Lewis Howes

Enjoy the full episode here: https://youtu.be/4JPnQjSA1OE

Understand yourself and those around you.

psychology

Psychology

personaldevelopment

Personal Development

mindfulness

Mindfulness

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Motivation & Inspiration

mentalhealth

Mental Health

Inspiring people to transform themselves through motivational content. 



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TikTok: @TheMentorHouse





The Mentor House

Are you a villain or a hero?

The Difference Between The Villain And The Hero Is One Thing

A simple question, with a seemingly simple answer. But, if we know from our years of existence, it is that the simplest of questions often have the most complex answers. So, again...are you your thoughts?

Are you your thoughts?

Well...stay with me. I am not going philoshopical here. We are just trying to look at the facts, and decipher the truth. A rather scientific approach at the divine manifestation, that is our mind.

Yes...And...No

This is the most obvious and widely accepted answer. And it is not hard to see why. People's behaviour and personality are based on their thoughts. The way they think is the way they behave. And thus, most often than not, we are our thoughts, or as perceived by others.

This is the complex part. Our actions are surely derived from our thoughts. But, weirdly we also have an eagle's eye vision of our own actions. We feel regret, feel wrong, or right about the way we think or behave.

And..NO

If you really think about it, and truly try to understand how you work. What you will realize is, that you have the power to disconnect from your thoughts and look at yourself as an observer. You aren't your thoughts. Your thoughts are but a part of you.

The two voices

Let me try and break it down further for you. Are you your teeth? Probably not! Teeth are a part of who you are, but they hardly impact your day to day life. Until, they start aching, or if there's an issue with them. You truly understand the power of your teeth once you feel its pain. In the same vein, a broken brain that spews dillusional thoughts of self-hate, work in the same way as a broken tooth. You can't live a happy life with an aching tooth, you can't live a fulfilling life with a broken mind.

The Broken tooth

Meditation is the way to finding your true self. When you see yourself as a third person, are able to understand every aspect of who you truly are, and then let go of the damaged and broken thoughts. That's the way to salvation and leading a healthy happy life. Don't let the aching tooth ache, treat it, it's possible. Just seek the right guidance, that's all!

Meditate

Recently, I have been on the path of self-discovery. I am learning things about myself, that sound so basic, but when truly understood and integrated can have a life-changing impact. This was something that truly blew me away!

meditation

Meditation

Are You Defined by Your Thoughts? Regain Control NOW!

Trust is built on authenticity.
People appreciate and gravitate toward those who are genuine.
Show up as your true self - people can spot a fake from a mile away.

1. Be Genuine and Authentic

Try to understand and share the feelings of others.
Empathy creates an emotional connection, which is a cornerstone of successful relationships.

2. Show Empathy

The act of listening shows that you value others' opinions and experiences.
Make them feel heard and understood. It's one of the simplest yet most powerful ways to make someone feel important.

3. Be a Good Listener

Go out of your way to be helpful.
This demonstrates your care and concern for others, making them feel valued and appreciated.
Helping others also fosters positive relationships.

4. Offer Help

Reliability is a key trait of a respected person.
Keep your promises and commitments.
It not only shows that you're trustworthy but also dependable.

5. Be Reliable

Kindness is contagious and leaves a lasting impression.
Even small acts of kindness can make a big impact on others' lives.

6. Practice Kindness

Remember, humility is a virtue.
Recognize that we all have strengths and weaknesses.
No one is superior or inferior - humility is respected and appreciated by all.

7. Stay Humble

Gratitude goes a long way. Everyone wants to feel appreciated.
Recognize their contributions and efforts. A simple thank you can make someone's day.

8. Show Appreciation

Clear, direct, and open communication helps to avoid misunderstandings.
It also builds trust and promotes understanding.

9. Communicate Effectively

Everyone deserves respect, regardless of their beliefs, experiences, or perspectives.
Respecting others fosters a positive and inclusive environment.

10. Respect Others

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Business

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Books

leadershipandmanagement

Leadership & Management

How to Win Anyone in Life

A Summary of the video published by Lana Blakely on YouTubeIntroductionIn a world brimming with distractions and endless to-do lists, achieving true productivity can often feel like an elusive goal. We often find ourselves lacking the motivation and discipline required to get things done. Consuming content about productivity, as appealing as it may be, doesn't necessarily equate to being genuinely productive. This article aims to provide a practical and straightforward approach to mastering productivity in three key parts: the day before, the day of, and the night of.

Mastering Productivity: A Three-Part Guide

<ol><li>Feeling Good</li><li>Feeling Ready</li></ol>

A. The Day Before: Preparing for Success

The foundation of a productive day begins the night before. It's essential to go to bed feeling good, as this sets the tone for the day ahead. Feeling good at night increases the likelihood of waking up positive.Focus on basic self-care aspects:<ol><li>Exercise: Regular physical activity boosts both mental and physical well-being, helping you sleep better and feel confident.</li><li>Diet: Eating healthily provides your body with the necessary nutrients to maintain energy and focus.</li><li>Hygiene: Simple acts like a hot shower and a night time skincare routine can have impact on how you feel when you wake up.</li></ol>

1. Feeling Good

The second aspect of preparing for a productive day involves spending 10-15 minutes the night before to set the stage. Start by creating a "Target List" to define your objectives for the upcoming day. Once you have your target list, plan your environment accordingly to simplify tasks for the following day.

2. Feeling Ready

<ol><li> Avoid Overloading with Simple Tasks: Don't clutter your list with small, low-energy tasks just to boost your productivity score. Focus on what truly matters.</li><li>Target List as a Tool, Not a Productivity Achievement: Understand that creating a target list is not equivalent to productive work. It's a tool to help you become more productive, not a substitute for actual productivity.</li></ol>

Two essential considerations when crafting TARGET LIST

<ol><li>Ensure you have all necessary equipment charged and ready.</li><li>Set out workout clothes and other essentials.</li><li>Organize your workspace to minimize morning stress.</li></ol>

Plan The Environment To Simplify Your Tasks

By preparing in advance, you save valuable time and energy and reduce the chances of morning frustration.

On the actual day, you'll face common productivity hurdles. Recognizing and addressing these issues is crucial to staying on track.<ol><li>Clear objectives</li><li>Over thinking</li><li>Distractions</li></ol>

B. The Day Of: Overcoming Common Productivity Challenges

Unclear objectives often lead to unproductivity. Defining the purpose of your tasks is key to maintaining focus and taking meaningful action. When you're unsure about the real purpose of a project or task, it becomes challenging to make progress.

1. Clear Objectives

Overthinking can cripple productivity by creating indecision and self-doubt. Accept that there's no perfect decision, and new information will constantly alter your perspective. To break the cycle of overthinking, sometimes it's best to just start or stop, depending on your situation.

2. Over Thinking

Unproductive moments often result from distractions. An unclear objective and overthinking can lead to seeking refuge in diversions like social media. Identify your primary distractions and develop strategies to handle them. The Pomodoro Technique, which involves 25-minute focused work intervals followed by 5-minute breaks, can help maintain concentration and reduce distractions.

3. Distractions

The final part of mastering productivity is reflecting on your day. To make tomorrow better, you must understand today. Be brutally honest with yourself during this reflection. Ask questions like:●	 How was your day?●	 What contributed to your level of productivity?●	 What distractions hindered your progress?Taking an honest inventory of your day allows you to pinpoint areas for improvement. The truth, even if it feels uncomfortable, is the first step toward growth.

C. The Night Of: Reflecting and Improving

roductivity need not be an elusive concept. By following this three-part guide, you can enhance your productivity and achieve your goals more efficiently. Remember that simplicity can be incredibly effective, and mastering productivity is within your reach.

Conclusion

In this video, I share a few methods that I use for productivity.

This is where I get all my music and sound effects — https://geni.us/lanablakelymusic (get a 30 day free trial)

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Business mail —hello@lanablakely.com 

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What camera, lens and mic I use — https://www.lanablakely.com/filmmaking 

Link article: https://medium.com/personal-growth-lab/dont-fall-into-the-trap-of-productive-procrastination-cd8c9707c956 

#productivity #motivation #discipline
procrastination, stop procrastinating, how to stop procrastinating

productivity

Productivity

career

Career

education

Learning & Education

In this video, I share a few methods that I use for productivity.

This is where I get all my music and sound effects — https://geni.us/lanablakelymusic (get a 30 day free trial)

Sign up to my newsletter here — https://www.lanablakely.com

The book I recommend: https://geni.us/zii0 (affiliate link)

For access to more videos, blog posts and the book club, go here —https://www.patreon.com/lanablakely 

My Instagram — http://www.instagram.com/lanablakely 

My Facebook page — http://www.facebook.com/lanablakelys 

My Twitter — http://www.twitter.com/lanablakelys 

Our Reddit community — https://www.reddit.com/r/Lana_Blakely 

Business mail —hello@lanablakely.com 

My website — https://www.lanablakely.com

Books I recommend — https://www.lanablakely.com/bookclub

What camera, lens and mic I use — https://www.lanablakely.com/filmmaking 

Link article: https://medium.com/personal-growth-lab/dont-fall-into-the-trap-of-productive-procrastination-cd8c9707c956 

#productivity #motivation #discipline
procrastination, stop procrastinating, how to stop procrastinating

This is my open journal. 

Business email ⟶  lanablakely@sixteenth.co  


Lana Blakely

A Video For Lazy and Unmotivated People

Motivation for the Lazy and Unmotivated

Anger is a natural emotion. Like every emotion, it has its place. But when anger controls us instead of us controlling it, it can harm relationships, health, and our state of mind.
Here are 8 ways we can manage this fiery emotion:
<ol>
<li>Understand the Roots</li>
<li>Pause & Reflect</li>
<li>Communication is Key</li>
<li>Avoid Triggers</li>
<li>Listen Actively</li>
<li>Prioritize Self-care</li>
<li>Exercise & Techniques</li>
<li>Journaling</li>
</ol>

Emotion:

Anger often masks other emotions like hurt, frustration, or fear. Recognizing the true root cause helps in addressing the actual issue rather than lashing out. Ask yourself, "Why am I REALLY angry?

1. Understand the Roots:

Before reacting, take a deep breath.Give yourself a moment to think. This tiny gap allows your logical brain to catch up with your emotional brain, potentially preventing an outburst or regrettable action.

2. Pause & Reflect:

Instead of exploding, communicate. Express your feelings without attacking. Start with "I feel" rather than "You always". It's about how you're feeling, not about blaming others.

3. Communication is Key:

Know your triggers. Recognize what sets you off. If certain topics, people, or situations consistently make you angry, be proactive. Either avoid them or prepare mentally beforehand.

4. Avoid Triggers:

Sometimes we get angry because we feel misunderstood or unheard. Make an effort to listen to others. This fosters understanding and reduces the chances of miscommunication leading to anger.

5. Listen Actively:

Can't stress this enough. Lack of sleep, high stress, and poor diet can heighten our irritability. Prioritizing self-care can stabilize our mood, making us less prone to anger outbursts.

6. Prioritize Self-care:

Techniques like meditation, deep breathing exercises, and visualization can be invaluable. They help calm the mind and give us tools to cope when anger begins to boil.

7. Exercise & Techniques:

Writing down your feelings can be therapeutic. It offers a safe outlet for your anger and can help you understand patterns or recurring issues. Over time, this insight can guide your reactions.

8. Journaling:

Remember, it's a continuous journey. Just as anger didn't develop overnight, controlling it will require consistent effort. Every day, make a conscious choice to respond, not react.

Remember:

loveandrelationships

Love & Relationships

If You Want To Control Your Anger, Read This:

Thoughts are like dogs. Your pet likes it when you give it what it wants; it's like you're listening to it. After training, they become organized, attentive, and they listen to you.
When you get a thought, hear it, nurture it, tell the thought what you want, and let it pass. There will be more space left in your mind to do more productive tasks throughout the day

I Love Dogs And Thoughts

philosophy

Philosophy

What to do with negative thoughts?

Project management is a diverse discipline that can be found in any industry at any level. There is a broad demand for skills in the process of initiating, planning, executing, controlling and closing the work of a team to achieve the desired outcome.As a result, with a Graduate Diploma in Project Management, you could find yourself communicating with people from multiple backgrounds in a wide range of specialisations.So, here’s a guide to ten of the most important terms that all project management professionals should understand.

Lead like a pro!

As defined by the Project Management Body of Knowledge, the <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Project_plan">project plan </a>is, ‘a formal, approved document used to guide both project execution and project control.’ It’s one of the most important documents in project management which is prepared by and relied on by the project manager.<ul><li>why the project is being undertaken</li><li>what work the project involves</li><li>who will perform the work; </li><li>and includes a timeline of when work will be completed.</li></ul>Along the timeline are milestones, which are dates where specified work must be completed and where progress, budgets and resources can all be measured.

Project Plan

<a href="https://www.cio.com/article/3156998/agile-project-management-a-beginners-guide.html">Agile is a form of project management </a>that identifies priorities in the project and works on them in sessions called sprints. The team focuses their attention on each sprint, then reviews their work with the client to identify issues or opportunities before starting the next sprint. Agile is popular in software development as the client interaction often highlights new priorities and allows work in previous sprints to be revisited.Scrum is a form of agile which is often misunderstood as the only way of being agile.

Agile

<a href="https://www.lucidchart.com/blog/waterfall-project-management-methodology">Waterfall is another, more traditional form of project management </a>that is popular outside of software development, in industries such as manufacturing and construction. With the waterfall methodology, the client is consulted during the planning stage to break the project into sequential phases.The phases in waterfall are staggered, where the end of each phase is marked with a milestone, and the next phase does not start until the previous phase was completed.Unlike agile, the waterfall method doesn’t allow previous phases to be revisited.

Waterfall (Traditional)

If the project plan is one of the most important documents in project management, then the scope statement is one of the most important parts of the project plan. <a href="https://www.wrike.com/project-management-guide/faq/what-is-scope-in-project-management/">A scope statement outlines the common understanding among stakeholders </a>of what work will go into the project and what outcomes will define its success.Sometimes the client, or other stakeholders, will ask the project manager to undertake work that isn’t part of the scope statement or is out of scope. If the project manager agrees, they risk scope creep, which can blow out budgets and timelines.

Scope

A <a href="https://www.gantt.com/">Gantt chart </a>is a visual representation of the individual tasks in a project. It’s a bar chart that would form part of your project plan with a calendar running along the top (x-axis) and the list of tasks running down the side (y-axis). Each task is represented as a bar along with the dates on which it is scheduled to occur. Related tasks can be linked to show their relationship.

Gantt Chart

<a href="https://www.teamgantt.com/blog/top-10-project-management-terms-and-what-they-mean">A risk is an event that may or may not occur </a>, but if it does, it will impact negatively on the project. Project managers prepare for risks with a risk assessment. First, they have to assess the likelihood of the risk, then decide what precautions to take. If the risk is very unlikely, they may take no precautions, or if it’s more likely, they may prepare a contingency plan.For more significant risks, there may be a section of the budget allocated to compensate, or even special equipment purchased to mitigate that risk.

Risk

While a risk is something that hasn’t happened yet, an issue is something that has happened – whether it was a risk or not. An issue is basically a problem that must be resolved.It can be as simple as resources not arriving on time, or something so complex that the entire project grinds to a halt. For example, an $85 million hotel project in the United States recently experienced the worst kind of issue when the construction collapsed, killing two workers.<a href="https://www.cbsnews.com/news/hard-rock-cafe-hotel-collapse-new-orleans-video-purports-to-show-concerns-days-before/">It appears that this issue may have been preceded by risks </a>that could have been addressed.

Issue(s)

Generally prepared weekly or daily, a <a href="https://www.teamgantt.com/project-status-report-template">status report </a>is a standardised update on the project that is distributed to stakeholders. It describes the project’s current situation, highlights any risks or issues and reviews milestones. Status reports use consistent measurements, terms, layout and distribution to make it easy for all stakeholders to access and understand. All of these factors are usually decided upon in the planning stage of the project.

Status Report

<a href="https://www.thebalancecareers.com/project-management-terms-2779537">The sponsor is effectively the head of the project</a> . They may be the owner or general manager of the organisation who has requested the project. Or they may be a representative of a large organisation or government for whom the project is being undertaken.The project manager reports to the sponsor who has the capacity to make executive decisions, approve budgets and agree on the final specifications.

Sponsor

Outside of project management, change management is concerned with assisting employees with a change in strategy or a change in culture. <a href="https://www.projectmanager.com/training/what-is-change-management">In project management, the focus of change management is quite different </a>. It’s about managing changes to the project plan with relation to the scope, the budget or the timeline.These changes may be prompted by risks, issues or requests from the sponsor. Of course, you’ll put your heart and soul into preparing an effective project plan, but it’s wise to remember that one of the constants in life is change.

Change Management (Change Control Board)

Wanna be a certified PMP Project Manager? Follow me for curated information pertaining to the PMP certification.

Project management is a diverse discipline that can be found in any industry at any level. We explore ten of the most important terms that all project management professionals should understand.

marketingandsales

Marketing & Sales

problemsolving

Problem Solving

How to speak like a project manager

TRULY EFFECTIVE PROJECT MANAGERS are not easy to find. Although many people have the potential to become successful project managers, a person must first understand the duties of a project manager before he or she can be sufficiently effective in that role.The project manager has the single most important position on a project and has the overall responsibility for its success. This position comes with a tremendous responsibility, accountability, ownership and authority.So what are these critical roles?

Roles of a Project Manager (PMP / PMI Prep)

Performs Project Tracking. The No. 1 reason for tracking a project is to discover potential problems before they occur. The project manager applies this proactive approach in routinely tracking the project members’ progress against their project commitments.Adopts Project Management Best Practices. The project manager, not management, is responsible for defining, teaching, and enforcing the use of good project management practices.

The Critical ones (1)

Manages to Project Priorities; Performs Risk Management. The project manager understands that the No. 1 problem on all projects is that the most important problems are not being worked to a swift closure; therefore, most of the project manager's time each day is dedicated to addressing the project's top three-to-five priorities.Communicates Project Status Upward and to the Client. No significant project status leaves the boundaries of the project without project manager approval.

The Critical ones (2)

Drives Decision-Making to Lowest Level Possible. The project manager drives ownership of decisions to the level where the accountability of the decision must lie. A key result is that project members, with proper training and coaching, will almost always rise to the expectations placed on them.Promotes Client Involvement. The project manager recognizes that project success is directly related to satisfying the client; therefore, client involvement is essential to ensure that the right product is built.

The Critical ones (3)

Encourages and Supports Escalations. The project manager establishes a project culture where escalations to resolve “stagnant” problems are viewed as good business and not viewed as being personal.Enforces Effective Change Control. The project manager ensures that scope creep, communications, and quality are carefully managed.Mentors Project Members. The project manager is a teacher and a helper.Promotes Good Working Relationships. The project manager serves as a role model in promoting good working relationships across a project.

The Critical ones (4)

Makes Things Happen. You don't have to be the smartest, most knowledgeable person on the project to be the project manager. You do, however, have to have the knowledge, skills and experience to be able to recognize when problems surface or potential problems are looming. You must be able to articulate those problems, bring the right people together to solve those problems and know when the problem has been properly addressed and closed—all this with the proper sense of urgency that the problem requires.

The Critical ones (5)

Neal Whitten, PMP, president of The Neal Whitten Group (<a href="http://www.nealwhittengroup.com/">www.nealwhittengroup.com﻿</a>), is a speaker, trainer, consultant and author. His books include Becoming an Indispensable Employee in a Disposable World. Comments on this column should be directed to <a href="mailto:editorial@pmi.org">editorial@pmi.org</a>.

Important Roles of a Project Manager

Stand tall with your shoulders back and head held high. This simple adjustment instantly conveys confidence and authority. Avoid slouching or hunching over, as it gives off an air of insecurity.

1. Posture speaks volumes:

Maintaining steady eye contact demonstrates: • Engagement• Attentiveness• Sincerity It shows that you are present and genuinely interested in the conversation.

2. Eye contact is a game-changer:

When meeting someone, extend your hand with a confident grip. A limp handshake can be perceived as weak or disinterested. Aim for a firm handshake that conveys professionalism and confidence.

3. A firm handshake makes a lasting impression:

A genuine smile has the power to light up a room. It conveys: • Warmth• Positivity• Approachability Smiling not only influences how others perceive you but also boosts your own mood and confidence.

4. Smile from within:

People naturally gravitate towards those who mimic their body language subtly. Mirroring gestures, such as leaning in when they do or adopting a similar stance, fosters a sense of connection and understanding.

5. Mirroring builds rapport:

Crossing your arms or legs can create a barrier between you and others, signalling defensiveness or disinterest. Instead, adopt open gestures, such as keeping your arms relaxed, or using expansive hand movements while speaking.

6. Use open gestures to invite connection:

The way you speak can significantly impact how your message is received. Maintain a confident and assertive tone, while also being mindful of being respectful and attentive to others.

7. Pay attention to your voice and tone:

Nervous habits like: • Tapping your foot• Playing with your hair• Excessive fidgeting , can undermine your presence Be aware of these habits and consciously work on minimizing them Embrace stillness and composure to project confidence and focus

8. Control the fidgeting: 

Sometimes, the most impactful moments are created in the absence of words. Embrace moments of silence to convey: • Thoughtfulness• Attentiveness• Composure It allows you to respond effectively, leaving a powerful impression on others.

9. Master the power of silence: 

9 WAYS TO MASTER THE POWER OF BODY LANGUAGE & SOCIAL GROUP

What situations come into your mind when you think about discomfort?<ul><li>You would like to contact someone, but don't because you haven't for a long time.</li><li>You would like to share your constructive criticism at work, but don't want to feel rejected.</li><li>Or you would like to be able to pet a dog to start a little talk with the owner, but don't feel certain.</li></ul>That are just some examples for more introverted people like myself, but everyone has their own comfort- and discomfort zones.

Do you have Zone Control?

Discomfort can be caused by a mixture of emotions like<ul><li>Uncertainty - How will someone react to my action?</li><li>Worries - What will someone think about me after taking this action?</li><li>Fear - Will I be rejected, because of taking this action?</li></ul>All subforms of anxiety and shame.

How do you act on your Discomfort?

Anxiety and shame cause a stress response in our bodies. The extent and that's why also the consequences of this stress response depends on our perception.<ul><li>An extrovert might not perceive the earlier mentioned example-situations as stress</li><li>While an introvert might even avoid social situations (fight or flight) in the first place</li></ul>

The consequences of Stress

Do one thing everyday, that scares you. – Eleanor Roosevelt

A quote that can change your Perception*

*in longterm with habitual practice.When we collect more experience with our age, some realise that changing our view, values, habits etc. wasn't and won't ever come easy, but gets harder with age tendentionally.

Children feel less discomfort of taking action, because in their early life stage they are less capable of thinking about the possible scary or emberassing consequences of their actions (less anxiety & shame). Their few life experiences make them less able to anticipate. Instead they focus more on the present than the future.

Why change is easier for Children? 

<ul><li>Introverts think more likely about the consequences, the reactio, of their actions (future focus)</li><li>Extroverts think more likely about the action itself (present focus) or are more stoic about their thoughts focusing possible future outcomes</li><li>Those extroverts who notice a stress response, but react calmly, are more likely to have learned it intentionally with self-awareness.</li></ul>

What's the difference between Introverts and Extroverts?

This article adresses a possible approach of getting more life-control about discomfort causing situations. It covers the importance of perception as a key for change and integrates common concepts like the "5 second rule", self-awareness, habitualization, "Kaizen" and self-reflection, while contrasting an introverted mindset with an extroverted one.

Mastering Discomfort: Your Journey to Self-Improvement

Find  Self Improvement Tips - Curated from popular Books like Atomic Habits, 48 Rules of Power, Deep Work, Rich Dad Poor Dad and way more!