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4 Exercises to Help You Handle Anxiety, Fear, and Anger

https://www.inc.com/christina-desmarais/4-simple-ways-to-increase-your-emotional-intelligence.html

inc.com

4 Exercises to Help You Handle Anxiety, Fear, and Anger
How a person deals with other human beings is a big factor in whether or not he or she succeeds in business and life. It involves emotional intelligence (EI), or the ability to recognize and appropriately react to feelings in yourself and the people around you, particularly when it comes to handling stress and frustration.

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Emotional Intelligence (EI)

Emotional Intelligence (EI)

The ability to recognize and appropriately react to feelings in yourself and the people around you, particularly when it comes to handling stress and frustration.

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4 Ways to build your emotional intelligence

4 Ways to build your emotional intelligence
  • Study yourself. Pay attention to your reactions and behaviours to get a better understanding of your emotional responses.
  • Manage emotions during stressful situations by breathing correctly. Breathe deep and steady through the nose with a relaxed ribcage to lower stress in the body.
  • Channel your emotions. Transform negative energies into positive ones by redirecting them to fuel new opportunities.

  • Transmute your emotions. Try to transform negative feelings such as anger, hatred, pain, and jealousy into positive ones such as love, admiration, compassion and kindness.

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SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:

Anger and Aggression

  • Anger: An emotion felt when we believe we have been wronged.
  • Aggression: is an act of expression of the anger, by our words our actions. Aggressio...

Validation and Boundaries

  • We can try and validate the anger felt by an individual by making them know that their anger is maybe justified while putting firm but respectful boundaries on their aggression.
  • We then need to be clear about what type of aggression we are willing to tolerate, setting boundaries on the unacceptable.
  • We may have to put our foot down and be ready to leave the conversation or escalate the issue, without falling into the trap of guilt and emotion.
  • If possible, we need to restart the conversation when things have cooled down, and diffuse the issue in a calm way.

Avoiding Speculative Self-Talk

Unchecked self-talk can easily turn into self-delusion. The stories we create almost always make you look like the good guy and cannot be termed as objective.

  • The way to get out of this speculative self-delusion is to avoid any speculation about other people's anger, at least initially.
  • Make sure to note down the facts of the situation. This can make the story less according to your gut instinct, and more towards the objective reality.

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Develop Your Self-awareness

  • Learn to manage your own emotions. 
  • Practice noticing your feelings, thoughts, and behavior--your triggers. Document things as they com...

Be Assertive and Set Boundaries

An assertive person takes full responsibility for herself and her actions. 

  • Seek self-control, be fair and reasonable, take on the part of the problem that belongs to you, and keep the rest of the problem where it belongs--with the difficult person.
  • Set limits and stand up for yourself so others won't take advantage. 
  • Use "I" statements, not "you" statements (these tend to lead to attack and blame).

Listen

  • Give the difficult person a chance to finish without interrupting. 
  • Ask clarifying questions if confused, and use paraphrasing and mirroring to check the accuracy of hearing.
  • Acknowledge the other person's feelings. So, if the other person is angry, say, "You must be feeling very frustrated..."

Pause

Pausing gives you time to stop and think before you act. Doing so can prevent you from doing things you'll later regret.

If you feel your emotions getting out of control, take a pause. If pos...

Mind Your Tone

We tend to respond to people using the same tone they use to speak to us.

If you need to have an emotionally charged conversation, speak in a way that's calm and collected. And if a discussion begins to escalate, focus on softening your tone or lowering your voice; others are likely to mimic you.

Mute

Sharing your opinion when others are aggravated can be counterproductive. If things get emotional, and you can’t leave, you may need to stop talking and let them express their feelings.

Breathe deeply and remember that moods are temporary. And that their words at this point may be extreme or exaggerated; resist the urge to respond in kind. Often, once they let everything out, they'll calm down.