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How to Win Friends and Influence People: The Best Summary

https://fs.blog/2012/07/how-to-win-friends-and-influence-people/

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How to Win Friends and Influence People: The Best Summary
A brief, no fluff, summary of Dale Carnegie's How to Win Friends and Influence People. Techniques in Handling People Don't criticize, condemn or complain. Give honest and sincere appreciation. Arouse in the other person an eager want. Six ways to make people like you Become genuinely interested in other people.

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Techniques in Handling People

  • Don’t criticize, condemn or complain.
  • Give honest and sincere appreciation.
  • Arouse in the other person an eager want.
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    6 ways to make people like you

    1. Become sincerely interested in other people.
    2. Smile.
    3. Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
    4. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
    5. Talk in terms of the other person’s interests.
    6. Make the other person feel important.

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    Win people to your way of thinking

    • The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
    • Never say, “You’re wrong.” Respect the other person’s opinions.
    • If you are wrong, admit it.
    • Get the other person saying “yes, yes” immediately.
    • Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
    • Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers.
    • Try to see things from the other person’s point of view.
    • Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires.
    • Appeal to the nobler motives.
    • Dramatize your ideas.
    • Throw down a challenge.

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    Change People Without Offense

    • Give praise and honest appreciation.
    • Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly.
    • Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
    • Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
    • Praise the slightest improvement.
    • Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
    • Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.
    • Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.

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    Dale Carnegie

    "When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudices and motivated by pride and vanity."

    Dale Carnegie

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    Dale Carnegie

    "The only way on earth to influence other people is to talk about what they want and show them how to get it." 

    Dale Carnegie

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    Dale Carnegie

    "If there is any one secret of success, it lies in the ability to get the other person’s point of view and see things from that person’s angle as well as from your own."

    Dale Carnegie

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    Dale Carnegie

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    Dale Carnegie

    Handling People

    • Don’t criticize, condemn or complain. People learn faster and retain knowledge more effectively when rewarded for good behavior than punished for bad behavior.
    • Give honest and sincere appreciation. The only way to get a person to do anything is by giving them what they want.
    • Arouse in the other person an eager want. The only way to influence other people is to talk about what they want and show them how to get it.

    Appreciation and flattery

    • Flattery is selfish and insincere. It’s cheap praise. You tell the other person precisely what he thinks about himself.
    • Appreciation is unselfish and sincere. It happens when we stop thinking about ourselves and begin to think of the other person’s good points.

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    You can go after the job you want—and get it! You can take the job you have—and improve it! You can take any situation—and make it work for you! Dale Carnegie’s rock-solid, time-tested advice has carried countless people up the ladder of success in their business and personal lives. One of the most groundbreaking and timeless bestsellers of all time, How to Win Friends & Influence People will teach you: -Six ways to make people like you -Twelve ways to win people to your way of thinking -Nine ways to change people without arousing resentment And much more! Achieve your maximum potential—a must-read for the twenty-first century with more than 15 million copies sold!

    Essential Techniques For Handling People

    Essential Techniques For Handling People
    • Don’t criticize, condemn or complain.
    • Give honest and sincere appreciation.
    • Arouse in the other person an eager want.

    Criticizing Others Doesn’t Yield Anything Positive

    We aren’t able to make real changes by criticizing people, and we’re instead often met with resentment. It’s important to remember that when dealing with people, we’re dealing not with creatures of logic, but with creatures of emotion, who are motivated by pride and ego.

    Criticism is futile and dangerous. It puts a person in a defensive mode. People learn faster and retain knowledge more effectively when rewarded for good behavior than punished for bad behavior

    William James

    William James

    "The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated."