Which of These Four Attachment Styles Is Yours? - Deepstash
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Attachment Styles

Attachment Styles

We all have a personal bonding style, which is based early on in life according to our upbringing and how we act, feel and think in a close relationship.

Attachment is our bond with our first caregiver, which is usually a parent. The style we form while growing up usually stays with us in adulthood and beyond.

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Secure Attachment Style

  • When a partner has a secure attachment style, they feel comfortable and confident in their relationship and in their significant other.
  • There is a feeling of connectedness, trust, and freedom as both the partners let the other have independence and offer full support all the time.
  • A strong and secure life amply supported by one’s parents builds the foundation of this style.

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Dismissive Or Avoidant Attachment Style

  • Many people find it uncomfortable to trust the other person or to get too emotionally close.
  • They are self-sufficient and do not need emotional intimacy.
  • They quickly pull away and ‘go in a cave’ when rejected or hurt.
  • Having negligent or abusive parents is associated with people having this style, and they often suppress their internal need for love and care.

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Anxious Or Preoccupied Attachment Style

  • Some people are always craving for emotional intimacy, even when the other person is not serious or romantic.
  • They are in a constant need of approval and reassurances from their partner, and tend to be anxious when the other person isn’t providing any.
  • These people are dependent on others for their self-worth and are often involved with people who don’t like this clingy style.

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Disorganized Attachment Style

  • Some people are doing the opposite of what should ideally be done.Their internal fears and their avoidant attitude are a paradox, and they cannot figure out if they want emotional closeness or not.
  • They deny their own feelings and never fully trust the other person.
  • The feelings of jealousy and rivalry come easily to them.
  • This style is often the result of some major loss or trauma in their lives, which made them never take security and closeness for granted.

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"At the touch of love, everyone becomes a poet." - Plato

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