How To Outsmart A Manipulator: 6 Steps To Recover Your Power And Prevent Abuse - Makin Wellness - Deepstash

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understand the technique of a manipulator

  1. Pay attention to their words and actions
  2. Recognise the signs of manipulation
  3. Be aware of body language
  4. Be confident
  5. Ask clarifying questions
  6. Focus on facts
  7. Keep your cool.


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1. Know Your Trigger

Identify the situations or words that most often make you defensive and reactive. A manipulator will use this information against you. If you can think about what triggers you the most, you can preemptively learn not to be so affected by them. When they try to use it during a heated conversation, those words will not give up their power so easily.


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2. Practice Self-control

Take time to practice controlling your emotions when presented with difficult situations. This may include delaying your response or allowing someone to run their mouth a bit, even if what they say is untrue and unkind. Controlling your emotions doesn’t mean you don’t respond; it just means you control when and how you respond.


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3. Have An Exit Plan

Be familiar with what steps you can take if things become too much. An exit plan could mean asking for a break or leaving the house so you can get some space. Often, it can feel scary to use your exit plan for fear of what they will say. Remember, you get to choose how people talk to you, and you can leave if they don’t respect your boundaries.


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4. Remind Yourself Of Your Value

No matter how they attempt to manipulate you, you can still assert your right to respect, boundaries, and space. Your value, lovability, and importance are inherent. You may feel quite the opposite if you have been belittled for a long time. Know that what they say is simply false.


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5. Take A Deep Breath

Take time to breathe deeply after being triggered, which can help you to remember how you want to respond instead of responding emotionally to their attacks. It also takes up space in the conversation, which shows them that you are essential and don’t feel rushed or pressured to respond immediately.


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Write A Script For Yourself

Come up with some common phrases or sentences you can regularly use to deflect manipulative tactics. For example, if they belittle or talk down to you, try saying something like, “I hear what you’re saying. However, I feel differently about this and would appreciate your respecting my opinion.”


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