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It is good then, to know how to be assertive without being obnoxious.
Effective persistence should always be based on providing incremental value.
From your conversation, you may have gathered insights on something that is important to the other persons, such as family, projects, or key interests. Offer an introduction or invite them to an event of importance.
No one is interested in an elaborate saga. Instead, ask a short, clear question on a subject in which the other person has expertise. They'll often be glad to help.
Follow up on an agreed time. If they tell you they’ll be busy until the fall, then don’t send them another message on July 31st. Wait until autumn starts and then send a polite note.
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To be effective in organizations today, you must be able to influence people. Your title alone isn’t always enough to sway others, nor do you always have a formal position.
Work on cultivating personal connections with your colleagues, and allow them to get to know you.
You don’t have to be “the greatest person in the room” or make sure “everyone is blown away by your charisma.” You just need to have good rapport with your colleagues. That way, they won’t impute negative intentions or motives to you.
Start by giving them your undivided attention in one-on-one situations. Turn your body toward the other person, freeze in place, and listen.
But skipping them isn't the bes...
See networking from a different perspective: You’re not just networking because you should; you’re doing it because it’s good for your career.
Think about the people you would like to get to know and then carve out time to accomplish that goal:
Research has shown that social rejection activates many of the same brain regions involved in physical pain, which helps explains why disapproval stings.
You're in this territory if you:
Reflect on how your childhood or early development may be contributing to your current approval-seeking behavior. In many cases, a tendency to seek approval at work stems from something in your past.
For example, were you taught to respect authority growing up? If so, you may feel uncomfortable expressing disagreement in work contexts.