To get through life, we all need to ask for help - here's how NOT to do it

While reciprocity does make people more likely to comply with the request, it also makes us feel controlled, which takes all the fun out of it.

Reminding someone that they owe you a favor does not create good feelings. Scorekeeping is fundamentally bad for relationships.

The motivation to be helpful is tied to your helper’s identity and self-esteem. People help because they want to be admired.

• Other-praising (Acknowledging and validating the character or abilities of the giver.) “You go out of your way …” or  “I feel like you’re really good at that.”

• Self-benefit (Describing how the receiver is better off for having been given help). “It let me relax.” or “It makes me happy.”