We Expect Way Too Much From Our Romantic Partners - Deepstash
We Expect Way Too Much From Our Romantic Partners

We Expect Way Too Much From Our Romantic Partners

Curated from: theatlantic.com

Ideas, facts & insights covering these topics:

5 ideas


2.79K reads


Explore the World's Best Ideas

Join today and uncover 100+ curated journeys from 50+ topics. Unlock access to our mobile app with extensive features.

Expectations of marriage

People are increasingly seeking self-actualization within their marriages. On top of the age-old love and cherish, the hope is that our spouse will help us grow to become a better version of ourselves.

It is not uncommon to hear, "He's a wonderful man, but I feel really stagnant in the relationship."


866 reads

The cultural shift

  • Before the 1950s, there were well-defined expectations for how people should behave. Women were supposed to be nurturing, but not too assertive. Men were supposed to be assertive but not really nurturing.
  • Around the 1960s, we rebelled as a society against the norms and preferred humanistic psychology with ideas about human potential and the possibility of living a more authentic life.


446 reads

Fulfillment of goals

The changing nature of our expectations of marriage has made more marriages fall short and disappoint us. But the fulfillment of a new set of goals is now within reach.

We can have a beautiful set of experiences with our spouse. We can have a particularly satisfying marriage, but we can’t do it if we’re not spending the time and the emotional energy to understand each other and help promote each other’s personal growth.


464 reads

Fixing an imbalance

It is probably a bad plan to throw all your expectations on the one relationship.

People who have a diversified social portfolio, where they look to an array of different people to manage different sorts of emotions, tend to have an overall higher-quality life.


505 reads

Going all-in

The idea of going all-in is to realize that to ask your spouse to help make you feel loved and grow into an ideal authentic version of yourself is a massive ask.  You will do the same for him or her. And because it is such an enormous ask, you'll make sure to spend sufficient time together.


516 reads



How we talk to each other determines a big part of how we live.

Holden O.'s ideas are part of this journey:

Wellbeing at Work

Learn more about loveandrelationships with this collection

How to prioritize self-care in the workplace

How to adapt to new work arrangements

How to maintain work-life balance

Related collections

Similar ideas

Read & Learn

20x Faster





Personalized microlearning

100+ Learning Journeys

Access to 200,000+ ideas

Access to the mobile app

Unlimited idea saving

Unlimited history

Unlimited listening to ideas

Downloading & offline access

Supercharge your mind with one idea per day

Enter your email and spend 1 minute every day to learn something new.


I agree to receive email updates