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Being hypercritical and judgmental is often unconsciously learned. It seems to fill a need such as making one feel powerful or smart where one is feeling sad or bored.
You may feel that you are merely pointing out the truth, but the general attitude of being judgmental won't win you many friends.
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Positive and negative reinforcement is powerful to sustain many habits. For example, drugs alleviate negative feelings and add positive ones.
Similarly, a habit of judgmentalness can be positively reinforced, such as the thrill of being right or feeling intellectually superior. But the biggest positive emotion while being judgmental is self-righteous anger.
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We often classify anger as negative because the outcomes are negative. But anger itself is positive when we separate it from its surrounding thoughts and behaviours.
When we assess an injustice, we often conclude that something is wrong, but that I am right! The feeling of anger is a sense of power, agency, control, pride, and righteousness. It leads to a pleasurable emotional experience.
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Anger is an antidepressant. Awareness of this pattern of judgmentalness leading to anger serves to alleviate a painful emotion like sadness. We should take a closer look at our emotional lives.
Anger makes us passive. While you invest your time and energy arguing and being judgmental, that time and energy could be better spent finding a real solution to your problem.
118
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