You Don’t Need to Be Cheerful Just Because It’s the Holidays - Deepstash
Toxic Positivity

It is the idea or the mindset that says that we need to stay positive at all times. It happens because of the overgeneralization that being positive is the only way to get through life.

Being positive all of the time is to deny ourselves to feel and minimize what we are feeling which restricts us from experiencing something normal.



Spreading toxic positivity can cause problems in our lives, may it be personal, romantic, or at work.

We may have good intentions as to why we shy away from opening up with other people but it will come off as being dishonest and could put a strain on your relationship and will provide only mistrust.



It is important that we become completely conscious of how we react to things and when to react. Being able to feel negative emotions is normal and should be normalized. Here are ways we can prevent the spread of toxic positivity:

  1. Listen to the other person intently and genuinely
  2. Do not give unsolicited advice
  3. Practice empathy
  4. Encourage vulnerability

Having a safe space to share and connect with someone is important so that we don't completely dwell on negativity.



Sometimes we can be too hard on ourselves and we deny ourselves the experience of pain or heartbreak because we firmly believe that "positivity is the key to happiness" however it is not always the case.

  • Allow yourself to feel. Dig deep into your own emotions and get to know the how's and why's of your emotions.
  • Check-in on a friend and allow them to help you, as long as they have the mental capacity to do so.

Do not shy away from asking for help and give people the chance to do right by you.



When people push you to "keep being positive" do not react immediately, instead, with a level head, try these:

  1. Ask the person to clarify their intentions as to why they're pushing for positivity
  2. Let them explain what positivity means to them and the importance of why you should be positive too. Have them elaborate
  3. Engage in a genuine conversation about what you're feeling and the importance of "It's okay not to be okay"



During this holiday season, it is easy to feel disconnected from everyone because of the protocols needed to follow. Fortunately, there are many apps we can use to keep connected with our friends and our loved ones.

We can still create the feeling of togetherness by promoting a safe space to be vulnerable, for asking non-invasive personal questions, and really getting to know our social circle.



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