Suman Saha's Key Ideas from Think Like a Monk
by Jay Shetty

Our true identity is just like a mirror covered in dust of the influence of others. Shetty explains that cleaning your mirror will not be a pleasant experience. Only once you have removed the dust obscuring your mirror can you see your true reflection - who you truly are.

Know the difference between attachment and detachment - 

• Attachment is wanting something to happen in a particular way.
• Detachment occurs when you want something to happen in the best way.

The problem with attachment is that we think we know the best way.

Pursue Higher Values, like - gratitude, service, truthfulness, and compassion, which will bring -

• Happiness
• Fulfillment 
• Meaningful life

Avoid Lower values, like - greed, lust, anger, and envy, which will bring -

• Anxiety
• Depression
• Suffering

Learn to encourage a culture of compassion, specifically self-compassion and self-forgiveness. Instead of beating yourself up about your mistakes, try to build the muscles to help you be resilient. If you feed your resilience effectively, then you will be happy irrespective of what life brings you.

You need to put on your protective shield. You should not walk onto the battlefield of life without doing your training and shielding.

The people who have a negative mindset, are those who always complain, blame, criticize, give pressure, give orders, and compares. Try to avoid them, although it is not possible to avoid everyone. But you can try these methods - 

1. Allocate Time: Set up a time for these specific people (how much time you are going to spend with them)
2. 75/25 rule: Try to spend 25% or less time with them.
3. Don't get involved: Stop involving yourself in problems and discussions that you don't know.

To remove inner negativity use 3S - 

1. SPOT (awareness): Firstly, you need to learn to spot negative thoughts as they arise.
2. STOP (addressing): Once you have spotted the negative thoughts, you can start considering how you can stop them.
3. SWAP (amending): Finally, you should swap the time you spend within these negative environments with something productive

Having the wrong intention for the right thing can lead us down the wrong path.

• As alignment means having your intention aligned with your action. Being aligned means looking for the right thing in the right way. 
• Positive intention is extremely powerful. You can be doing the wrong thing with the right intention and still get to where you want to be.

You need to stop and think about why you are doing something. Do not let external factors drive your internal happiness. Allowing external factors to drive your happiness means you are putting your happiness in somebody else’s hands. 

• Location Has Energy: Set a specific location for each specific task. When you perform a task in a specific place, you will feel a kind of energy that will drive you to perform that task.
• Time Has Memory: Every time you are doing a specific task at a specific time - it gets automated.

You can follow the 3 simple rule to improve your morning routine - 

1. Don’t Look at Your Phone: in the first 2 hours of your day.
2. Plan Your Next Day the Night Before: Make simple decisions today about tomorrow and plan the day beforehand.
3. Integrate TIME Into Your Life: T stands for Thankfulness (for what you are grateful today?), I stands for Insight (Learn or Grow - Read books, listen to podcasts), M stands for Meditation( at least 2 minutes each day) and E stands for Exercise (only for 15 minutes).

Our minds influence our values. We are not our minds, but our mind is a vehicle for deciding what is important to us. 

Your mind is fed by the movies you watch, the music you hear, the books you read, the TV shows you binge, and the people you follow online and offline. The more you are absorbed by negative sources, including troubling news and gossip, the more your values are tainted with envy, judgment, competition, and discontent.

The heart of all challenges in relationships is diagnosing what we are asking for and what we need. Most of us are asking for something from relationships that we don’t actually need. The most common thing that people want from their partner is time.

When loved ones are asking for your time they are asking for these characteristics-

1. Presence
2. Attention
3. Intimacy

They want something deeper than just spending time with them. Try to be present at the moment by avoiding digital and thought distractions. Ensure you are paying full attention to the other individual and what they are saying. Finally, put time aside to enjoy the company of your loved ones alone. Intimate conversations are where you can both be yourselves.