Pain and pleasure are on a balance. Whenever we experience something that feels great (high dopamine level), the body will regulate itself leading to a slightly lower baseline of dopamine (i.e. less drive, joy, motivation, etc). Repeating this process without giving our body time to get back to "normal" baseline levels of dopamine can emotionally drain us and we feel depressed.

Relentless pursuit of pleasure leads to pain

Abstinence(e.g. a social media fast or quitting smoking or whatever you feel like you are consuming in too large quantities) resets the brain's reward pathway allowing you to enjoy the simple things in life (a beautiful day, a meaningful conversation, play time with your pet, ...).

Recovery begins with Abstinence

Activities that are exhausting, challenging, or painful like cold showers, confronting one's fears, or working out can increase your dopamine level after you did those activities. However, too much pain is not good either and pain can be addicting as well.

Pain can reset our balance to the side of pleasure

Being honest no matter the consequences improves relationships, awareness and allows us to be more authentic, spontaneous and feel more free in the moment.

The positive impact of radical honesty

Destructive shame means pushing someone away in response to uncovering their addictive behavior. This results in that person feeling isolated and more likely to lie about that behavior in the future leading to more isolation. This isolation will then lead to more overconsumption, thus, creating a destructive cycle. Prosocial shame means accepting someone's flaws without shunning them. It is based on the idea that everyone makes mistakes and people need to be forgiven. However, this does not mean encouraging addictive behavior

Prosocial Shame vs. Destructive Shame

INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES and LOS ANGELES TIMES BESTSELLER “Brilliant… riveting, scary, cogent, and cleverly argued.”—Beth Macy, author of Dopesick As heard on Fresh Air This book is about pleasure. It’s also about pain. Most important, it’s about how to find the delicate balance between the two, and why now more than ever finding balance is essential. We’re living in a time of unprecedented access to high-reward, high-dopamine stimuli: drugs, food, news, gambling, shopping, gaming, texting, sexting, Facebooking, Instagramming, YouTubing, tweeting… The increased numbers, variety, and potency is staggering. The smartphone is the modern-day hypodermic needle, delivering digital dopamine 24/7 for a wired generation. As such we’ve all become vulnerable to compulsive overconsumption. In Dopamine Nation, Dr. Anna Lembke, psychiatrist and author, explores the exciting new scientific discoveries that explain why the relentless pursuit of pleasure leads to pain…and what to do about it. Condensing complex neuroscience into easy-to-understand metaphors, Lembke illustrates how finding contentment and connectedness means keeping dopamine in check. The lived experiences of her patients are the gripping fabric of her narrative. Their riveting stories of suffering and redemption give us all hope for managing our consumption and transforming our lives. In essence, Dopamine Nation shows that the secret to finding balance is combining the science of desire with the wisdom of recovery.

Understand yourself and those around you.

psychology

Psychology

personaldevelopment

Personal Development

health

Health

books

Books

INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES and LOS ANGELES TIMES BESTSELLER “Brilliant . . . riveting, scary, cogent, and cleverly argued.”—Beth Macy, author of Dopesick, as heard on Fresh Air This book is about pleasure. It’s also about pain. Most important, it’s about how to find the delicate balance between the two, and why now more than ever finding balance is essential. We’re living in a time of unprecedented access to high-reward, high-dopamine stimuli: drugs, food, news, gambling, shopping, gaming, texting, sexting, Facebooking, Instagramming, YouTubing, tweeting . . . The increased numbers, variety, and potency is staggering. The smartphone is the modern-day hypodermic needle, delivering digital dopamine 24/7 for a wired generation. As such we’ve all become vulnerable to compulsive overconsumption.   In Dopamine Nation, Dr. Anna Lembke, psychiatrist and author, explores the exciting new scientific discoveries that explain why the relentless pursuit of pleasure leads to pain . . . and what to do about it. Condensing complex neuroscience into easy-to-understand metaphors, Lembke illustrates how finding contentment and connectedness means keeping dopamine in check. The lived experiences of her patients are the gripping fabric of her narrative. Their riveting stories of suffering and redemption give us all hope for managing our consumption and transforming our lives. In essence, Dopamine Nation shows that the secret to finding balance is combining the science of desire with the wisdom of recovery.

Dr. Anna Lembke is an accomplished writer whose work has resonated with readers around the world. Dr. Anna Lembke has published several books that explore a range of topics, from fiction to nonfiction, and has received critical acclaim for the ability to weave compelling narratives. Dr. Anna Lembke's writing style is known for its depth and authenticity, and has earned quite a loyal following of readers.

Dr. Anna Lembke

Dopamine Nation

Obviously, excessive regret is a bad thing. Ruminating over mistakes leads to depression and anxiety. It’s like banging your head against a wall but with absolutely none of the benefits.That said, the attitude of “no regrets” is dumb and wrong. This emotion is useful and necessary. Regret can be a stroke of genius. (Though, admittedly, at first it just feels like a stroke.)

Regret Redeemed

Regrets that result from a failure to act responsibly. When we weren’t conscientious, prudent, or disciplined enough. We shirk in school, eschew exercise, or don’t work hard enough on the job. We opt for short-term pleasure instead of long-term gain. We all want dessert first.When you hear yourself saying the words “too much” followed by “too little”, you’re probably dealing with a foundation regret. “I did too much spending and not enough saving.”

Foundation Regrets  

Boldness regrets sound like this: “If only I’d taken that risk…”Inaction. Foregone opportunities. The chance we did not take. They are also common when it came to career. We play it safe. We didn’t jump on that new job opportunity or start our own business.The old saying is accurate, “We regret most the things we did not do.”

Boldness Regrets

You know the ones. You behave poorly, break the rules, lie, or betray. Moral regrets sound like: “If I’d only done the right thing…”The lesson here? Do the right thing. Make the decision you will be proud of in the future, no matter how tempting the immediate alternative.

Moral Regrets

We let friendships die – or never give them the chance to bloom. This was the most common of the big four regrets. Connection regrets sound like this: “If only I’d reached out…”It’s not hard to rekindle relationships at first. But often we wait too long. Feelings fade. People move on. And, eventually, people die. (Researchers have found this dramatically reduces how often they reply to your text messages.) If you do not reach out, there may never be another chance. The opportunity is lost forever. This is tragic. Terrifying.

Connection Regrets

First, can you undo what caused the regret? Can you reach out, make it right or apologize? If so, stop doom-scrolling through your mental regret list and take action. There’s often a way to press Control+Z on your existential keyboard.But sometimes there isn’t a way to fix the past. (Regret or no regret, I am not retaking the SAT’s.) In that case, there are three steps for coping: disclose, reframe, and extract a lesson.

Whaddya Gonna Do About It?

Here’s how to deal with regret:Regret can be a good thing: A regret is a lesson you need to put into action to make yourself better. Your work is not yet finished, Daredevil.Foundation regrets: Avoid them by doing the work.Boldness regrets: Dodge them by taking that risk.Moral regrets: Do the right thing, Spike Lee.Connection regrets: Text them. Now.How to cope: Can you undo it? If not: disclose, reframe, and extract a lesson.

Sum Up

Don’t see regret as an ever-present threat. See it as a helpful reminder. An opportunity to improve your life. The pandemic has created regrets in all of us. Lost time, lost opportunities, lost connections. Now’s the time to fix them.

"No regrets" is silly. The latest research is showing regret can be a very positive thing that improves our lives. Here's how...

motivationandinspiration

Motivation & Inspiration

mentalhealth

Mental Health

problemsolving

Problem Solving

This Is How To Overcome Regret: 5 Secrets From Research - Barking Up The Wrong Tree

6 WEAPONS of Influencing People :<ol><li>RECIPROCITY</li><li>CONSISTENCY</li><li>SOCIAL PROOF</li><li>LIKING</li><li>AUTHORITY</li><li>SCARCITY</li></ol>

Short Summary 

<ul><li>When someone gives us something, we feel obliged to repay them back. It’s for this reason that people are more likely to say “Yes” to your request when you first give them a small gift or perform a small favour (People will be nice if you’re nice to them).</li><li>Something as small as a pen has been shown to influence people well beyond its monetary value.</li><li>For example, according to the American Disabled Veterans organisation, mailing out a simple appeal for donations produces an 18% success rate; but, enclosing a small gift--personalized address labels--boosts the success rate to 35%.</li></ul>

RECIPROCITY

<ul><li>It is quite simple, our nearly obsessive desire to be and to appear consistent with what we have already done (Commitment).</li></ul>Toy Companies Strategy:<ul><li>Advertise one kind of a toy. Parents promise their kids they will buy it for them</li><li>Before Christmas they don’t offer it, saying sold out. Buying some other toy.</li><li>In Jan and Feb when it was previously quiet, they release it. Parents already made their commitments now have to buy it.</li></ul>

CONSISTENCY 

<ul>
<li>Ever wonder why TV shows use laugh tracks. It’s so you know when to laugh.</li>
<li>People will more likely say yes when they see other people doing it too. This is amplified in situations of uncertainty, where we look to others for cues on what we should do.</li>
<li>Humans are social by nature and generally feel that it’s important to conform to the norms of a social group. </li>
<li>As 95% of people are imitators and 5% are initiators, people are more persuaded by the actions of others than any other proof.</li>
<li>Charities spend a lot of the time showing how other viewers have made contributions.</li>
</ul>

SOCIAL PROOF

We like people who are similar to us, with the same views, interests, beliefs and values. We therefore need to find areas of shared interest to increase rapport and connection.You like Coffee?! Wait, I like coffee too! We have so much in common!<ul><li>Nearly every advertisement you see will feature individuals designed to appeal to the product’s target market. The more the consumer associates with and likes that person, the more likely they are to be influenced by them.</li></ul>

LIKING

<ul><li>We’re taught in childhood that we should obey authority figures such as: parents, teachers, coaches, policemen, doctors etc..</li><li>This carries over into adulthood where we continue to look up to and are influenced by recognized experts and officials. </li><li>Dentists in white coats are used to sell us toothpaste, airline staff wear uniforms to remind us of their authority and many an email signature is appended with a string of qualifications in an effort to increase the individual’s authority.</li></ul>

AUTHORITY

<ul><li>Research shows that humans respond MORE to “fear of loss” than “gaining something“.</li><li>Companies will use “limited time offers” to make it appear products are in a short supply to increase buying frequency. </li><li>The next time you’re shopping on Amazon and Zappos, pay attention to see if they’re using this tactic. It’s amazing how no matter what pair of shoes you select, there ALWAYS tends to be “only 2 pair left!”.</li><li>If you offer people something rare or scarce, they are more likely to want it.</li><li>We have the tendency to want what has been banned.</li></ul>

SCARCITY

leadershipandmanagement

Leadership & Management

career

Career

communication

Communication

How To Be Effortlessly Charismatic

Ever wonder why TV shows use laugh tracks? -People are more likely to laugh when they hear others laughing

The foundational and wildly popular go-to resource for influence and persuasion—a renowned international bestseller, with over 5 million copies sold—now revised adding: new research, new insights, new examples, and online applications. In the new edition of this highly acclaimed bestseller, Robert Cialdini—New York Times bestselling author of Pre-Suasion and the seminal expert in the fields of influence and persuasion—explains the psychology of why people say yes and how to apply these insights ethically in business and everyday settings. Using memorable stories and relatable examples, Cialdini makes this crucially important subject surprisingly easy. With Cialdini as a guide, you don’t have to be a scientist to learn how to use this science. You’ll learn Cialdini’s Universal Principles of Influence, including new research and new uses so you can become an even more skilled persuader—and just as importantly, you’ll learn how to defend yourself against unethical influence attempts. You may think you know these principles, but without understanding their intricacies, you may be ceding their power to someone else. Cialdini’s Principles of Persuasion: Reciprocation Commitment and Consistency Social Proof Liking Authority Scarcity Unity, the newest principle for this edition Understanding and applying the principles ethically is cost-free and deceptively easy. Backed by Dr. Cialdini’s 35 years of evidence-based, peer-reviewed scientific research—including a three-year field study on what leads people to change—Influence is a comprehensive guide to using these principles to move others in your direction.

marketingandsales

Marketing & Sales

The foundational and wildly popular go-to resource for influence and persuasion—a renowned international bestseller, with over 5 million copies sold—now revised adding: new research, new insights, new examples, and online applications.In the new edition of this highly acclaimed bestseller, Robert Cialdini—New York Times bestselling author of Pre-Suasion and the seminal expert in the fields of influence and persuasion—explains the psychology of why people say yes and how to apply these insights ethically in business and everyday settings. Using memorable stories and relatable examples, Cialdini makes this crucially important subject surprisingly easy. With Cialdini as a guide, you don’t have to be a scientist to learn how to use this science. You’ll learn Cialdini’s Universal Principles of Influence, including new research and new uses so you can become an even more skilled persuader—and just as importantly, you’ll learn how to defend yourself against unethical influence attempts. You may think you know these principles, but without understanding their intricacies, you may be ceding their power to someone else. Cialdini’s Principles of Persuasion: <ul><li>Reciprocation</li><li>Commitment and Consistency</li><li>Social Proof </li><li>Liking </li><li>Authority</li><li>Scarcity</li><li>Unity, the newest principle for this edition</li></ul>Understanding and applying the principles ethically is cost-free and deceptively easy. Backed by Dr. Cialdini’s 35 years of evidence-based, peer-reviewed scientific research—including a three-year field study on what leads people to change—Influence is a comprehensive guide to using these principles to move others in your direction.

Robert B. Cialdini, PhD is an accomplished writer whose work has resonated with readers around the world. Robert B. Cialdini, PhD has published several books that explore a range of topics, from fiction to nonfiction, and has received critical acclaim for the ability to weave compelling narratives. Robert B. Cialdini, PhD's writing style is known for its depth and authenticity, and has earned quite a loyal following of readers.

Robert B. Cialdini, PhD

Influence

People think about “being technical” in a binary way, there are software developers who know how to code, and there’s everyone else.Being technically literate simply means that you’re comfortable with the basics of how technology works, and critically, you understand the area you work in with more depth.

Technical literacy does not mean learning to code

<ul><li>The base: The basics of software and hardware.</li></ul> What’s a computer? What’s the internet? What’s a database?<ul><li>The domain: Deeper knowledge that’s relevant to your job.</li></ul> What products are we building, selling, and using? How do they work? What problems do they solve? How do our engineers build and use them? How do your team’s tools work?The point of being technically literate means understanding and working with developers, and being an expert at the tools you need to get your job done.

Useful and practical Technical literacy has two layers

If you work at a startup, chances are you’re going to need to collaborate with developers. That work could be internal on internal tools, integrations, providing expertise, etc. or it could be external marketing to, selling to, and recruiting developersDevelopers can be some of the most curious, thoughtful, and creative people to work with. But from afar, they can appear intimidating at best and downright scary at worst.Understanding the basics of what code is, how it works, and what developers are doing every day will help break down that barrier and engender collaborative relationships.

The importance of working with and understanding software engineers.

Product: Without understanding how software engineers work and the basics of what code they’re writing you’ll be looking at a black box. Effectively prioritizing feature work, keeping tight timelines, and aligning stakeholders are all predicated on understanding the work your developers are doing. Recruiting: Technical literacy can help recruiters more quickly identify strong candidates, speak intelligently about internal engineering organizations, and articulate what kinds of interesting engineering problems candidates will get to work on.

Technical Literacy for common roles (1/2)

Marketing: Even if your product isn’t explicitly focused on developers, every startup eventually needs to build a developer program (see Slack and Twitter). Without technical literacy, marketers will be in the dark on how to effectively speak to and engage with this potentially lucrative audience.Sales: Developers are notorious for disliking being sold to, so the process requires a specific approach. You need to understand typical developer workflows especially as they relate to the product you’re selling as well as what makes your company’s product compelling to this technical audience.

Technical Literacy for common roles (2/2)

The better you understand the software your team relies on, the more proficient you’ll be in it. This already happens naturally: teams that are large enough will usually have one “power user” who seems to know the ins and outs of Salesforce, Lever, or whatever your team runs on. You want to be that person. Becoming a true power user requires hours of reading documentation, finding tutorials online, and engaging with the community around whichever tool you’re focused on.

Technical literacy on the job: working with tools

The tools you use day-to-day integrate with other parts of your company’s stack. Lever job postings might be displayed on your marketing website with Lever acting as the CMS; Intercom might be pulling user-level data from your data warehouse.Understanding them means the difference between something getting fixed immediately and something getting fixed in a couple of weeks.The more technically literate you get, the more of these small opportunities you’ll find in between the cracks of your company’s toolchain — and the more impactful you’ll be.

Technical literacy and integrations

Being technically literate can often mean the difference between being self-sufficient and getting delayed by engineering resources.

Start by taking a look at your company and your role, and where you think being more technical could give you an edge. Earlier we identified a couple of areas:<ul><li>Understanding and working with developers</li><li>Being an expert at your toolchain</li></ul>If you’re a marketer, you’ll want to focus on cultivating an understanding of the developer persona, as well as diving into specific topics like email deliverability/how data moves between systems. Be specific about what you want to learn. A useful question to ask is: “Where have I lost out by not being technical?”

Starting your technical journey: Make a plan

If you’re working in startups, you’re already surrounded by people who spend their entire days doing what you’re trying to learn a little bit about software.In this arena, you’ll want to come prepared. Structured conversations with questions you’ve thought of in advance are a much better use of a developer’s time than aimless curiosity. Try focusing on the areas you’re weakest in, and do research in advance so you’re not putting the entire learning burden on someone else

Find a developer friend or two

There aren’t many places on the web with curated resources you can just read through so you’re going to need to be scrappy. The best content for explaining tech concepts sits in two places:<ul><li>YouTube. It has a lot of garbage, but it can be a goldmine for visual explanations of technical concepts. The most useful videos are not always the flashiest or best-produced ones.</li><li>Company-specific blogs. These are harder to find, but generally, the best content for any individual concept comes from a company that makes money off said concept.</li></ul>

Get good at Google

Understanding how programming works, what a language is, and basic patterns like packages and version control will help you across the board:<ul><li>You’ll have a concrete understanding of what developers actually do</li><li>You’ll be able to write simple scripts and work with tools to automate your work</li><li>You’ll get a first-person view of the tools developers use today (React, Redux, etc.)</li></ul>Think about something cool you’d want to build or automate maybe a tip calculator or something to send emails and try focusing on learning what you need to build that specific thing

You don’t need to learn how to code to be technically literate

Once you’ve built your plan and started looking around the web for helpful content, you’ll likely come across some usual suspects in your particular field who are creating useful stuff. Follow them, A few examples:<ul><li>Benn Stancil’s Substack on data strategy and tools</li><li>Corey Quinn’s newsletter about AWS (and his entertaining <a href="https://twitter.com/QuinnyPig">T</a>witter)</li><li>Vicki Boykis’s newsletter about tech and tech culture</li><li>My Technically newsletter on getting more technical</li></ul>You might not understand everything you read, but diffusion is powerful and you’ll be surprised how quickly you improve.

Find influencers and experts in your space

Technical literacy is key to career success, even for non-engineers. Learn how to master the tools of your trade and build a solid tech foundation.

startup

Startups

computerscience

Computer Science

How to Excel in Tech Without Learning to Code

Aging can be categorized into two types and due to two types of factors, intrinsic and extrinsic.
<ul>
<li>Intrinsic aging is a genetically predetermined process that occurs naturally.</li>
<li>Extrinsic aging is a result of outside factors chosen by you, such as where you live, your stress levels, and your lifestyle habits (like smoking).</li>
</ul>

Types of aging

<ul>
<li>Programmed aging theories say that our cells have a predetermined lifespan that’s encoded into our bodies. These include:</li>
<li>Gene theory - suggests that specific genes turn “on” and “off” over time, causing aging.</li>
<li>Endocrine theory - here, aging is caused by changes in hormones.</li>
<li>Immunological theory - this is the idea that the immune response is designed to decline(autoimmunity), leading to disease and aging.</li>
</ul>

Programmed theories of aging

<ul>
<li>Wear and tear theory - cells break down and become damaged over time.</li>
<li>Genome instability theory -aging happens because the body loses its ability to repair DNA damage.</li>
<li>Cross-linkage theory - aging is due to the buildup of cross-linked proteins, which damages cells and slows biological functions.</li>
<li>Rate-of-living theory - an organism’s rate of metabolism determines its lifespan.</li>
<li>Free radical theory - aging is due to the buildup of oxidative stress, caused by free radicals.</li>
<li>Mitochondrial theory - mitochondrial damage releases free radicals and causes aging.</li>
</ul>

Error theories of aging

<ul>
<li>Telomere theory - Telomeres protect the ends of your chromosomes as they multiply. Over time, telomeres shorten, which is associated with disease and aging.</li>
<li>Programmed senescence theory - Cellular senescence occurs when cells stop dividing and growing, but don’t die.</li>
<li>Stem cell theory - Stem cells can turn into other cells, which helps repair tissue and organs. But the function of stem cells declines over time, potentially contributing to aging.</li>
<li>Longevity gene theory - This is the idea that certain genes extend lifespan.</li>
</ul>

Genetic theories of aging

It says that an organism begins aging after they have reached their peak of reproduction and have passed down adaptive traits.
<ul>
<li>Mutation accumulation - This theory presumes that random mutations accumulate later in life.</li>
<li>Antagonistic pleiotropy - According to this theory, genes that promote fertility early in life have negative effects later on.</li>
<li>Disposable soma theory - The theory claims that when more metabolic resources are directed toward reproduction, the less is put toward DNA repair. The result is cell damage and aging.</li>
</ul>

Evolutionary theory of aging

<ul>
<li>Advanced glycation end products (AGEs) - AGEs develop when fats or protein are exposed to sugar. High levels may lead to oxidative stress, which speeds up aging.</li>
<li>Heat shock response - Heat shock proteins protect cells from stress, but their response decreases as we age.</li>
<li>Damage accumulation - Normal chemical reactions damage DNA, proteins, and metabolites over time.</li>
</ul>

The biochemical theory of aging

In most parts of the world, women live longer than men . This is due to several biological, social, and environmental factors.
<ul>
<li>Estrogen is the female sex hormone, and has been found to have anti-inflammatory and immune-boosting effects, which may protect women from certain diseases.</li>
<li>In contrast, the male sex hormone, testosterone may suppress the immune system.</li>
</ul>

Women live longer than men

<ul>
<li>Eat a nutritious diet - Focus on fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and lean protein. Limit processed foods .</li>
<li>Stay active - Aim for 30 minutes a day, 5 days a week.</li>
<li>Avoid tobacco - Tobacco speeds up aging.</li>
<li>Drink alcohol in moderation - Alcohol increases your risk of chronic disease.</li>
<li>Attend regular checkups</li>
<li>Know your family history - To have appropriate screening or get early treatment for potential chronic diseases.</li>
<li>Engage your brain - by doing brain exercises.</li>
<li>Wear sunscreen - Sunscreen protects your skin from UV radiation, which can cause premature aging.</li>
</ul>

How to slow down aging

What is the best way to live longer? Here are a few factors within your control

scienceandnature

Science & Nature

longevity

Longevity

food

Food

How To Live A Long Life

There are about 300+ theories of aging, some which have been broken down here. Along with them, certain lifestyle changes which could slow down the physiological effects of aging. is also given.

Some aging theories suggest cells have a predetermined lifespan, while others claim it’s caused by damage, genetics, evolution, or biochemical reactions.

Why Do We Age, and Can Anything Be Done to Stop or Slow it?

<ul><li class="ql-align-center">This is the thing about resistance: If you’re doing what you think you should be doing rather than what you want to do with your whole heart, you are not persisting, you are resisting the truth about who and what you are.</li></ul>

Quit if the cost is too high, if you’re doing it because you feel you owe it to someone, or quit if you don’t love it.

It has helped me on my thought process behind a decision I'm thinking of

moneyandinvestments

Money & Investments

education

Learning & Education

When To Quit – Tim Ferriss • Podcast Notes

“Success unlocks both opportunities and distractions.”

“Most things are not as difficult as they seem—if you focus each day.However, giving one topic your full attention for an extended period of time is even harder than it seems.Over a long timeline, the bottleneck is usually attention not ability.”

“The greatest rewards in life are often delayed. The financial benefits of work and investing. The emotional benefits of marriage and friendship. The psychological benefits of creating something that matters. Meaningful outcomes take a long time to grow and compound. If you want your results to continue to grow, then you need relationships that last.One of the essential ingredients for success is being pleasant and trustworthy because it allows whatever you are building—a business, a relationship, a project—to continue. Many relationships disintegrate before the rewards accumulate.”

“Your first step is just that: the first of many steps. For so long I would stand still, afraid to move in any direction because I wasn’t sure which was the course I wanted to follow for the rest of my life. Finally, someone explained to me that my first steps did not necessarily determine one path for all my tomorrows. There would be more decisions, and more opportunities to make a shift should I need to do so.”

“It is important to remember that the viciousness and wrongs of life stick out very plainly but that even at the worst times there is a great deal of goodness, kindness, and day-to-day decency that goes unnoticed and makes no headlines.”

Entrepreneur and investor <a href="https://twitter.com/sama/status/1487586705074917376?s=21">Sam Altman </a>says some of the best advice he ever received was, “If you can't figure out what kind of work you like, pay attention to what's easy to concentrate on and gives you energy vs. what makes you tune out and feel tired.”What is easy for you to concentrate on?

1 QUESTION FOR YOU

productivity

Productivity

habits

Habits

3-2-1: Success, getting started, and the unnoticed good in the world

The first chaper of an ancient Daoist masterpiece (attributed to Zhuang Zhou, c369-286 BCE) concludes with a discourse about a huge twisted and knotted tree that made its wood unusable. Huizi considers the tree useless, and so everyone spurns it. But his friend Zhuangzi responds, "relax and do nothing by its side, or lie down for a free and easy sleep under it." Zhuangzi suggests further that we should not always aim for usefulness nor strive to produce or do things that benefit ourselves or others. He thought we could reclaim our lives and be happier if we became more useless.

Reclaiming our lives

In modern times, we often hear how we should avoid useless things such as pursuing the arts or humanities education. Or we are told to only allow for these things if they benefit the economy or human welfare. But Zhuangzi offers an antidote to this way of thinking and demonstrates that you can improve your life if you let go of the idea of wanting to serve a purpose. He argues that usefulness in itself should not be the purpose.

Becoming useless

"Axes will never shorten its life, nothing can ever harm it. If there's no use for it, how can it come to grief or pain?" A gnarled and bumpy tree cannot be reduced to its usefulness. By extension, neither can a human being. If one stops to focus on its usefulness, one can come to enjoy them. Zhuangzi similarly describes disabled people. They should be celebrated for who they are and not try to be fixed or changed.

Celebrate gnarly trees

Trying to be useful can end up harming you. For example, the gnarly tree can remain standing because it is deemed useless, but a neat and straight tree is cut down for timber. We should refrain from casting ourselves and our doings in terms of how much we contribute to the economy, the greater good, or even our future selves. Instead, we should be drifting, wandering, not concerned about praise or condemnation.

Being useful isn't always good for us

Throughout his book, Zhuangzi puts the ideas of freedom and play opposite usefulness. He thinks we need to reject the concept of usefulness because it does not make us happier or more in harmony with nature. Zhuangzi does not recommend that we shut ourselves away from society or give up a lucrative position to become a hermit in a mountain cabin. Instead, Zhuangzi responds to a mindset - that usefulness should be last when we evaluate our life choices.

A useless life is free

Welfarism is the idea that the value of something or someone is limited by if we or others benefit from it. A handful of philosophers in the West have argued against it. For example, Susan Wolf argues that 'we should think more creatively and imaginatively about the value of things we love in ways that are not confined to identifying some way in which we or others benefit from them.' Zhuangzi reasons that it is enough to simply be. Zhuangzi's vision might be likened to 'finding your groove'. Those who enjoy computers become programmers. Others become tennis players, surgeons, gardeners.

Become your true self

Follow the Daoist way – reclaim your life and happiness by letting go of the need to produce, strive or serve a purpose

How to be useless | Psyche Guides

Success isn’t that difficult; it merely involves taking twenty steps in a singular direction. Most people take one step in twenty directions.

If you want a different life, you must be a different person.

Getting enough self-discipline to get stuff done is tough. What if there was a way you could become ultra-productive and reach your dreams without having to just push through in misery? Here is how:<ul><li>Intentionally design your environment for success instead of worrying about willpower.</li><li>Optimize separate spaces for work and play for maximum productivity and fulfilment.</li><li>Quickly and firmly get rid of anything and everything that makes reaching your goals harder and requires willpower to resist. </li></ul>

The Premise

If we can intentionally design our environment, we’ll make improving ourselves easy.The two types of evolution:<ul><li>Natural Evolution, which is where organisms evolve based on their situations. </li><li>Domesticated Evolution, that involves controlling the environment of an organism to make it evolve as you want it to. </li></ul>Most often we just let ourselves evolve naturally, succumbing to the negative effects of a world that tries to make us fat, depressed, and in debt. But when we intentionally design our environment, everything changes.

Intentionally Design Your Environment

“Work hard, play hard” is a good mantra to live by but it needs some adjusting for this day and age. We need to add the idea that we must do each in a different place if we want to be the most efficient.When you intentionally designate one space for work and one for play, you optimize your body’s ability to work hard and recover. Set aside a room as your office where you only work, and another for relaxation, where you only spend time relaxing.

Designate Specific, Separate Places For Work and Play

When designing your environment for success, take this no-nonsense attitude into your efforts. Start by clearing up your phone from distractions. Get rid of the time-waster apps that are your go-to’s when you’re tired or bored from working.If you’re trying to eat healthier and lose weight, go to your closet and throw away all sugary foods immediately.

Eliminate Stuff That Requires Willpower To Resist

The Psychology of Willpower

We rely on willpower to create change in our lives...but what if we're thinking about it all wrong? In Willpower Doesn't Work, Benjamin Hardy explains that willpower is nothing more than a dangerous fad-one that is bound to lead to failure. Instead of "white-knuckling" your way to change, you need to instead alter your surroundings to support your goals. This book shows you how. The world around us is fast-paced, confusing, and full of distractions. It's easy to lose focus on what you want to achieve, and your willpower won't last long if your environment is in conflict with your goals--eventually, the environment will win out. Willpower Doesn't Work is the needed guided for today's over-stimulating and addicting environment. Willpower Doesn't Work will specifically teach you: How to make the biggest decisions of your life--and why those decisions must be made in specific settings How to create a daily "sacred" environment to live your life with intention, and not get sucked into the cultural addictions How to invest big in yourself to upgrade your environment and mindset How to put "forcing functions" in your life--so your default behaviors are precisely what you want them to be How to quickly put yourself in proximity to the most successful people in the world--and how to adapt their knowledge and skills to yourself even quicker How to create an environment where endless creativity and boundless productivity is the norm Benjamin Hardy will show you that nurture is far more powerful than your nature, and teach you how to create and control your environment so your environment will not create and control you.

We rely on willpower to create change in our lives...but what if we're thinking about it all wrong? In Willpower Doesn't Work, Benjamin Hardy explains that willpower is nothing more than a dangerous fad-one that is bound to lead to failure. Instead of "white-knuckling" your way to change, you need to instead alter your surroundings to support your goals. This book shows you how. The world around us is fast-paced, confusing, and full of distractions. It's easy to lose focus on what you want to achieve, and your willpower won't last long if your environment is in conflict with your goals--eventually, the environment will win out. Willpower Doesn't Work is the needed guided for today's over-stimulating and addicting environment. Willpower Doesn't Work will specifically teach you: <ul><li>How to make the biggest decisions of your life--and why those decisions must be made in specific settings</li><li>How to create a daily "sacred" environment to live your life with intention, and not get sucked into the cultural addictions</li><li>How to invest big in yourself to upgrade your environment and mindset</li><li>How to put "forcing functions" in your life--so your default behaviors are precisely what you want them to be</li><li>How to quickly put yourself in proximity to the most successful people in the world--and how to adapt their knowledge and skills to yourself even quicker</li><li>How to create an environment where endless creativity and boundless productivity is the norm</li></ul> Benjamin Hardy will show you that nurture is far more powerful than your nature, and teach you how to create and control your environment so your environment will not create and control you.

Benjamin Hardy

Willpower Doesn't Work

<ul><li>A large percentage of the population believe they were born with an innate learning style. </li><li>Studies show no evidence for learning styles, and many researchers fear they may discourage proven educational practices. </li><li>People, especially children, are learning generalists who should engage in many different methods of learning.</li></ul>

Key Takeaways

A prevalent neuromyth is that of “learning styles.” According to this belief, people can be classified by how they learn best and should concentrate their educational efforts in that mode. If someone is an auditory learner, the idea goes, she’ll master a subject or skill faster and more effectively by listening to lectures than reading books or through first-hand experiences.The idea of learning styles has infected our education systems and people’s understanding of themselves. And psychologists worry this can have consequences in our <a href="https://bigthink.com/smart-skills/lifelong-learning/">lifelong-learning</a> pursuits.

The Neuromyth Of Learning Styles

There is a grain of truth to the myth. Namely, people do differ in their abilities and preferences. The VARK learning model, for example, classifies people as either visual, auditory, reading/writing, or kinesthetic (hands-on) learners. Each method is part of the learning process, and people will have their favourites. Such preferences are as true in education as anything else in life.Many proponents believe learning styles are inheritable, emerge early in childhood, have a physiological basis, predict learning outcomes, and are immutable.

The Elements of Learning Style

Recent studies found no supporting evidence that learning was enhanced by a slavish dedication to a student’s learning styleIn fact, despite broad acceptance, studies continued to show no benefit to a learning-style approach. As <a href="https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S1041608009000375">one study’s authors</a> so aptly put it: “The most important finding of this study is, in essence, a non finding.”

The Learning Style Does Not Matter

Why then does the learning styles myth survive despite the evidence and experts’ red-faced arguments? Because like all neuromyths, it tells us something we want to believe. The classic music myth gives worried parents a sense of control. The 10-percent myth tells us we’re secretly super-geniuses who just need to unlock our potential.

Busting The Learning Style Myth

People prefer brain-based accounts of behaviour, and they like to categorize people into types. Learning styles allow people to do both of those things.It may also tie into common misconceptions of success.Success is complicated. It requires the right mixture of education, resources, skill, and luck. But we tend to streamline this equation into specialization equals success.

A Multi-Style Approach To Learning

Engage with subjects in as many material ways as possible. Read, converse, seek out examples, get hands-on, and experiment. While we may have preferences, we should also challenge ourselves to try new methods and re-engage with less-favoured ones. Each style is its own “genre” and each can be valuable in the creation of your lifelong-learning path.

Take The Generalist Approach

Learning styles are supposed to help learners take ownership of their education, but research doesn’t back up this well-intentioned myth.

Busting the learning styles myth: Why learning generalists perform best

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