Faking Your Emotions at Work - Deepstash
Faking Your Emotions at Work

Faking Your Emotions at Work

Curated from: WorkLife with Adam Grant

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Emotional work is difficult

Emotional work is difficult

We have to manage our emotions at work. However, we also manage other people's emotions. In service jobs, managing emotions is the job.

When you act badly, you're making someone else's task more difficult. That will spill over to affect the other customers that day. It may be their job to help us, but we can also do something to help them.

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Emotional labour

In any job, you have moments when you fake an emotion. It's hard labour to smile and act nice all day long even though you don't feel like it.

The easiest way to cope is to tell yourself, "This is my job. I have to pretend to be this person in this role when I'm at work." That's surface acting. It's wearing a mask that you take off when you leave the situation. And in the long run, it creates a feeling of inauthenticity, leading to burnout.

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An alternative to surface acting

It's exhausting to deal with rude customers all day. But how exhausting depends on how you approach emotional labour.

An alternative to surface acting is deep acting. Instead of putting on a mask, try to really feel the emotion. That way, the emotion comes out naturally. You can master deep acting similar to someone who does it on a theatre stage - you are required to convincingly channel the character's emotions.

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Focus on creating positive experiences

Research found that when we focus on the people who benefit from our work, it energises us. For example, firefighters and fundraisers are less likely to burn out when they see how their contribution helped others. Creating a positive outcome for customers makes the experience less negative.

When you delight someone, it will energise you if you think in terms of what you're giving them, not what you're getting in turn.

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"Building bridges" conversations

When people are masking how they're feeling at work, it can interfere with their productivity.

However, convening a Building Bridges meeting can bring people together. Any topic can be discussed, from politics to religion. Some ground rules can help, such as:

  • Ensuring that everyone feels like they can participate.
  • Recognize that listening is just as important as talking.
  • If you're nervous or don't know enough, ask an expert to show up with you.

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Deep acting techniques

Your mood will affect customers. But your mood will also affect your ability to solve problems.

  • Reappraising - reframing the situation. When customers are rude, the best approach is to listen to them, because they are often rude because of an underlying reason. Take the customer's perspective and consider what is causing them to act that way.
  • Refocusing. Draw your attention to things that lighten your mood, such as the purpose of your job.
  • When you know you have a long and stressful day, turn on some music to get you in a good mood. It can help you to manage the emotions of others.

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Creating the best customer experience

If you really want to create the best customer experience, put your customer second. 

Put your employees first. The emotions people experience on the job will impact the customer's experience. When employees are treated well, they naturally treat the customer well.

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IDEAS CURATED BY

holdenp

Spending a large amount of time with someone literally causes you to pick up their habits. Choose your friends wisely.

CURATOR'S NOTE

Emotional work is undervalued. While many jobs can be automated or outsourced, care and communication skills are becoming more important. It is then helpful to recognise that in any interaction, the entire emotional burden doesn't have to be on one person.

Holden P.'s ideas are part of this journey:

Managing People

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Conflict resolution

Motivating and inspiring others

Delegation

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