How to Win Friends and Influence People - Deepstash
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Talk in terms of the other person’s interests

  • The deepest urge in human nature is ‘the desire to be important.’ Make others feel important.
  • Give honest and sincere appreciation.
  • The only way on earth to influence other people is to talk about what they want and show them how to get it. 
  • Get the other person’s point of view and see things from that person’s angle as well as from your own.
  • You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.
  • Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.

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Master verbal communication

  • Say ‘Hello’ in tones that speak how pleased you are to have the person call.” Smile even on a call, it comes through in voice
  • Most times people don't want advice but a friendly, sympathetic listener to whom he could unburden himself. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
  • Ask questions that other people will enjoy answering.
  • Story telling is the most underrated skills, Dramatize your ideas, become a great story teller and learn to keep people interested.

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How to deal with conflicts

  • In an argument or in a heated situation, keep calm and watch out for your first reaction. It may be you at your worst.
  • In an argument, look for areas of agreement.
  • Show respect for the other person’s opinions. Never say, ‘You’re wrong directly.
  • If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
  • Say ‘If I were you I would undoubtedly feel just as you do.’ An answer like that will soften people.
  • Talk about your own mistakes before criticising the other person.

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How to converse effectively as a leader

  • Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
  • Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
  • Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement.
  • Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
  • Make the fault seem easy to correct.

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