7 Signs of Low Emotional Intelligence - Deepstash

deepstash

Beta

Deepstash brings you key ideas from the most inspiring articles like this one:

Read more efficiently

Save what inspires you

Remember anything

7 Signs of Low Emotional Intelligence

https://nickwignall.com/7-signs-of-low-emotional-intelligence/

nickwignall.com

7 Signs of Low Emotional Intelligence
Before you commit to any serious relationship or partnership, watch out for these seven signs of low emotional intelligence.

7

Key Ideas

Save all ideas

Avoiding talking about your feelings

Avoiding talking about your feelings

People with very low emotional intelligence will refuse to talk about their feelings because they aren't good at it. They may use vague language to describe how they feel, such as "I'm a little stressed" or "I'm kind of overwhelmed."

People with high emotional intelligence aren't afraid to describe their feelings. "I feel sad," "I'm angry," or "I'm disappointed."

416 SAVES

2.47k READS

VIEW

Judging your own feelings

Emotions like fear or sadness feel bad. People with low emotional intelligence criticize themselves, thinking it is wrong to feel afraid. Or shameful to feel sad.

People with high emotional intelligence understand that if something feels bad doesn't mean it is bad. They treat themselves with compassion and kindness when they feel this way.

402 SAVES

1.92k READS

Trying to control your emotions

People with low emotional intelligence think they have to solve difficult emotions. They try to get rid of any painful feelings.

Emotionally intelligent people see emotions as messengers. They validate them even if they don't like the content of the message.

411 SAVES

1.86k READS

Noticing only your loud emotions

People with low emotional intelligence tend only to notice the loudest emotions. If they get cut-off on the road while driving, they feel "mad" but aren't aware they're also feeling afraid.

People with high emotional intelligence have enough self-awareness to see all their emotions, even the secondary emotions.

376 SAVES

1.60k READS

Blindly following your emotions

Emotions can give important information, but they can also mislead us, such as feeling anger when our spouse points out a problem and asks us to correct it.

Emotionally intelligent people listen to all their emotions but never overvalue them. They don't put blind trust in any of them.

373 SAVES

1.39k READS

Trying to ‘fix’ the emotions of other people

People with low emotional intelligence are afraid of painful feelings in others, so they try to make them go away. For example, they try to explain why you shouldn't feel the way you do or attempt to solve your bad mood.

A sign of high emotional intelligence is when someone is willing to sit with your emotions without judgment or advice.

388 SAVES

1.36k READS

Pretending to be happy all the time

People with low emotional intelligence pretends to be happy all the time and don't want to admit or show when they're feeling sad, afraid, ashamed, or upset.

Emotionally intelligent people understand that there are no good or bad emotions. They're secure enough to feel bad and show it.

383 SAVES

1.65k READS

SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:

The 5 components of EI

  1. Self-Awareness: understanding of one’s emotions.
  2. Self-Regulation: it frees us from being prisoners of our feelings.
  3. Motivation: having an ...

There are 3 types of empathy

  • Emotional empathy: “You feel awful? Then I feel awful too!”
  • Cognitive empathy: “I understand that you are feeling awful. That must suck.”
  • Compassion: “You feel awful? I feel for you. How can I help?”

Compassion is what we focus on for emotional intelligence.

Emotional intelligence

It's the ability to accurately perceive your own and others’ emotions, to understand the signals that emotions send about relationships, and to manage your own and others’ emotions.

What Emotional Fitness is

It's the idea that in order to lead healthy, happy emotional lives we need consistent habits and exercises that support our mental health and wellbeing.

The Benefits of Emotional Fitness

  • Decreased stress: you learn to manage your triggers.
  • Better communication in relationships: it helps you to tolerate and manage difficult emotions and then find more productive ways to work through difficulties.
  • Decreased anxiety: you train your mind to stop fearing its own emotional reactions.
  • You stick with your goals: you learn to deal with emotions like anxiety, shame, regret.
  • Increased self-awareness: you learn to build a better relationship with your emotions.

Get to know your emotions

  • Emotional clarity: Taking the time to deliberately reflect on our emotions, to observe and label them.
  • Emotional myth-busting: Eliminating myths and misconceptions floating around people’s minds about emotions. 
  • Emotional tolerance: Learning to resist short-term gratification and instead invest in long-term values.

one more idea

Emotional Intelligence( EQ/EI)

Is the measure of an individual’s abilities to recognise and manage their emotions, and the emotions of other people, both individually and in groups.

Benefits of a higher EQ

  • Ease in forming and maintaining interpersonal relationships and in ‘fitting in’ to group situations.
  • A better understanding one's own psychological state, which can include managing stress effectively and being less likely to suffer from depression.

IQ and EQ

There is no correlation between IQ and EQ scores.

IQ has no connection with how people understand and deal with their emotions and the emotions of others (EQ). 

You simply can’t predict emotional intelligence based on how smart someone is.