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We observe people instinctively and notice subtleties such as what they are doing, where they are looking, and what their body language is indicating. This helps us determine if we feel comfortable around them which helps us decide if we want to interact with them and how.
If you start to feel comfortable near people, you might start to see better windows into how to act around them: when to talk or when they are unavailable. so you can make better dicisions on how to proceed.
Perspective taking relies not only upon our ability to share emotions with others, but also upon our capacity to regulate our own emotions.
The point is not to ask ourselves what we would do in any given situation; it’s to try and understand what another would do.
If we begin to better understand how others experience situations, we are more succesful in our interactions. We can predict the attitudes, expectations, and intentions of others that may be very different from our own.
Emotions are powerful vehicles to guide us in reading people. We naturally track the behaviors of others to try and determine what they are thinking, feeling doing or planning.
We determine people’s motives and intentions, even when our attention is not specifically on them.
These sensitivities to other people alert our gut instincts to the intentions of others and to sense any possible emotional changes in them.
Most people speak indirectly, which requires us to infer the actual meaning of what they are trying to say.
This creates a lot of room for misinterpretation, especially through text or email.
What we decide to say or not say requires that we interpret as accurately as possible what the other person is trying to say.
Most conflictual situations arise from a misinterpretation of what another is trying to communicate. Once communication is clear, trust is gained and success is inevitable.
Perspective taking requires the maturity to gain the knowledge and be respectful of another person’s personal beliefs.
When we are disrespectful to another person and their belief system it is the quickest path to creating separation and division between people.
Not all people share our personal views and beliefs of the world. We must remain open-minded and respectful to what others believe when relating to them.
This means knowing what not to say as much as means knowing what to say.
What you know about where people come from and how they came to be the people they are is critical in determining what to say and do.
It's frustrating when we give too much or too little information. Different persons react to just the right amount.
People often make the mistake of expecting us to know them well enough. No matter how well we know anyone though, we are human. It is through mistakes that we learn to find a balance in each individual relationship we have.
The way we communicate with people is based on how we perceive them to be, as people.
When we are around a coworker who is more serious or intellectual it calls for a different interaction approach from us then when interacting with someone who is more laid back and easy going.
To some extent we all become social chameleons, making slight shifts in our behavior to fit the people and personalities we are around in an effort to best relate to them. This social adaptation makes us well-rounded.
Success in life and business boils down effective interactions, humility, self-awareness and the all-important skill of perspective-taking. These elements are the keys to success of any kind.
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