How to have a difficult conversation | Psyche Guides - Deepstash

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Adar Cohen

Avoidance will only foster more conflict.

ADAR COHEN

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Don't Avoid Conflict

  • We tend to avoid conflict because we believe that it is bad, yet we continue to create it despite the fact.
  • Conflict isn't essentially a bad thing. It gives us the information we need to know so that we could work with others more effectively to improve our relationships with them and to grow as individuals.
  • In every conflict resolution phase, we must aim for: a solution, a plan, or an understanding.

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Gem Statement

A gem statement is a statement that allows the opportunity to open up a new conversation with the hopes of compromisation and a solution.

This usually involves expressing your emotions with the main issue beneath all the surface anger or any other emotion being experienced while having a positive impact on the other.

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Preparing For A Difficult Conversation

  • Before you talk to your partner or anyone you have to address an issue with, ask yourself whether you're ready to have the conversation.
  • Think about the things you need to say without being consumed by negative emotions. Are you willing to say what you need to say? You can always try to phone a friend to get rid of the pre-conversation jitters.
  • Remember that uttering your gem statement is always going to be a temporary discomfort: the benefits you'll experience will be lasting and profound.

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Starting A Difficult Conversation

  • Let the other party know that you believe that you will be able to sort out the issue on hand if you both try to understand each other.
  • Give each other the time to express one's experiences and emotions and the space to air out any grievances.
  • Whether you agree with each other doesn't really matter, what matters more is that you're able to actively listen and discern one another.

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536 reads

Closing A Difficult Conversation

  • As the conversation comes to a close take the time to reflect back on what you've discussed, the next steps to be taken, and if there's anything left each party wants to say to the other.
  • Remember to ask the most important thing before closing the conversation and that is "What has changed for you as a result of this conversation?"
  • Lastly, express gratitude towards the other person regardless of what may.

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614 reads

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