Learn more about psychology with this collection
Leonardo da Vinci's creative process
How to approach problem-solving like da Vinci
The importance of curiosity and observation
Some people are obsessed with giving gifts, even if they can't afford it.
Science says we do this because giving to others genuinely makes people happier. Even if you’re struggling to meet your own basic needs, you’re more likely to derive happiness from spending your money on someone else. But there is a limit.
It is useful to map out the habit loop.
People often think that a behaviour feels good, but when they pay attention while acting out that behaviour, they notice that it actually doesn't. After they notice unhelpful behaviours, it is important to replace the habit with something uplifting.
If you equate love and worth with things and giving, it doesn't mean you have to repeat the pattern. You have the autonomy and agency to decide what feels okay for you.
Love, care, and appreciation can be shown in other ways, such as a phone call or a glass of wine with your partner over dinner. People feel happier when they're making a real connection.
The idea of Gary Chapman's love languages is that everyone gives and receives love in different ways. If we want to show people that we care about them, we need to understand what behaviours they interpret as an expression of appreciation.
The five love languages are:
Most people prefer one over the others. Knowing which one a person prefers will free you from the need to spend money on fancy presents.
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