Your actions define who you are. Our habits are a reflection of our identity. The more we repeat a behavior, the more we reinforce the identity associated with that behavior.For example: if you make your bed every day, you are reinforcing the identity of someone who is organized and tidy. If you exercise regularly, you are reinforcing the identity of someone who is fit and healthy.James Clear argues that the best way to change our identity is to focus on changing our habits. By starting with small, easy habits, we can gradually build up a new identity that is more aligned with our goals.

Habits Shape Your Identity

Habits exist in order to help us do repetitive things automatically.PROBLEM PHASE:1 - Cue: the cue triggers the brain to a certain behavior, like you walk into dark room.2 - Craving: this is the motivation behind the habit, like you want to be able to seeSOLUTION PHASE:3 - Response: this is the action to perform, like you flip the light switch.4 - Reward: it has two purposes - to satisfy us and to teach us, like you satisfy your craving to see.

The 4 Steps of Habit Change

“If you can get 1 % better each day you will end up 37 times better by the time you’re done. If you get worst 1% every single day end up reaching nearly 0"

Good Habits have certain characteristics: <ul><li>Obvious: Put your gym bag by the door so you see it first thing in the morning.</li><li>Attractive: Listen to your favorite music while you work out.</li><li>Easy: Start your day with a 10-minute walk.</li><li>Satisfying: Write down your progress in a habit tracker.</li></ul>Bad Habits can be broken down by making them:<ul><li>Invisible: Hide your cigarettes so you don't see them every time.</li><li>Unattractive: Think about how bad your breath smells after you smoking.</li><li>Difficult: Set a goal to work for 25 minutes, even if you don't feel like it.</li><li>Unsatisfying: Remember how bad slacking off feels.</li></ul>

Good & Bad Habits

“A habit needs to be enjoyable for it to last.”What is instantly rewarded is done again. what instantly punished is ditched.To get a habit to stick You need to feel instantly successful, even if in a small way.

It's easy to get discouraged when you're trying to change your habits, especially if you don't see results immediately. But if you keep taking small steps forward, even if they're not huge, you'll eventually reach your goals.For example: if you're trying to lose weight, you might be tempted to skip a workout or eat a unhealthy meal. But if you do that, you'll be setting yourself back. It's better to make small, healthy choices that will help you reach your goals in the long run.

Walk Slowly, But Never Backward

If you can do an action in two minutes or less, tackle it at the moment — and don’t delay. The rule was created by David Allen in Getting Things Done & James Clear recommends it for habit building as well: When you start a new habit it should take less than two minutes to do.Any habit can be scaled down into a 2-minute version:<ul><li>Read before bed each night becomes read one page;</li><li>30 minutes of exercise becomes take out my yoga mat;</li><li>Fold the laundry becomes fold one pair of socks;</li></ul>

The 2-Minute Rule

We will instinctively choose the path that requires least amount of work. This is a universal law that has huge implications in habit formation: <ul><li>Create an environment where doing the right thing is as easy as possible.</li><li>Reduce the friction associated with good behaviors. When friction is low, habits are easy.</li><li>Increase the friction associated with bad behaviors. When friction is high, habits are difficult.</li></ul>

The Law Of Least Effort

Bad habits are not easy to break, especially if you find them satisfying. But it is possible. Read here how.

problemsolving

Problem Solving

health

Health

communication

Communication

personaldevelopment

Personal Development

How To Break Bad Habits

The #1 New York Times bestseller. Over 3 million copies sold! Tiny Changes, Remarkable Results No matter your goals, Atomic Habits offers a proven framework for improving--every day. James Clear, one of the world's leading experts on habit formation, reveals practical strategies that will teach you exactly how to form good habits, break bad ones, and master the tiny behaviors that lead to remarkable results. If you're having trouble changing your habits, the problem isn't you. The problem is your system. Bad habits repeat themselves again and again not because you don't want to change, but because you have the wrong system for change. You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems. Here, you'll get a proven system that can take you to new heights. Clear is known for his ability to distill complex topics into simple behaviors that can be easily applied to daily life and work. Here, he draws on the most proven ideas from biology, psychology, and neuroscience to create an easy-to-understand guide for making good habits inevitable and bad habits impossible. Along the way, readers will be inspired and entertained with true stories from Olympic gold medalists, award-winning artists, business leaders, life-saving physicians, and star comedians who have used the science of small habits to master their craft and vault to the top of their field. Learn how to: • make time for new habits (even when life gets crazy); • overcome a lack of motivation and willpower; • design your environment to make success easier; • get back on track when you fall off course; ...and much more. Atomic Habits will reshape the way you think about progress and success, and give you the tools and strategies you need to transform your habits--whether you are a team looking to win a championship, an organization hoping to redefine an industry, or simply an individual who wishes to quit smoking, lose weight, reduce stress, or achieve any other goal.

habits

Habits

timemanagement

Time Management

books

Books

The #1 New York Times bestseller. Over 10 million copies sold! Tiny Changes, Remarkable Results No matter your goals, Atomic Habits offers a proven framework for improving--every day. James Clear, one of the world's leading experts on habit formation, reveals practical strategies that will teach you exactly how to form good habits, break bad ones, and master the tiny behaviors that lead to remarkable results. If you're having trouble changing your habits, the problem isn't you. The problem is your system. Bad habits repeat themselves again and again not because you don't want to change, but because you have the wrong system for change. You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems. Here, you'll get a proven system that can take you to new heights. Clear is known for his ability to distill complex topics into simple behaviors that can be easily applied to daily life and work. Here, he draws on the most proven ideas from biology, psychology, and neuroscience to create an easy-to-understand guide for making good habits inevitable and bad habits impossible. Along the way, readers will be inspired and entertained with true stories from Olympic gold medalists, award-winning artists, business leaders, life-saving physicians, and star comedians who have used the science of small habits to master their craft and vault to the top of their field. Learn how to: <ul><li>make time for new habits (even when life gets crazy);</li></ul><ul><li>overcome a lack of motivation and willpower;</li></ul><ul><li>design your environment to make success easier;</li></ul><ul><li>get back on track when you fall off course;</li></ul>...and much more. Atomic Habits will reshape the way you think about progress and success, and give you the tools and strategies you need to transform your habits--whether you are a team looking to win a championship, an organization hoping to redefine an industry, or simply an individual who wishes to quit smoking, lose weight, reduce stress, or achieve any other goal.

James Clear is the author of "Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones" He writes about habits, decision-making, and continuous improvement at jamesclear.com. His website receives millions of visitors each month and hundreds of thousands subscribe to his popular email newsletter.His work has appeared in the New York Times, Entrepreneur, Time, and on CBS This Morning. He is a regular speaker at Fortune 500 companies and his work is used by teams in the NFL, NBA, and MLB. Learn more at jamesclear.com

James Clear

Atomic Habits

"When one person is in control of another, love cannot grow deeply and fully, as there is no freedom.”

Boundaries are just like a 'property line in one's life'. Just like in real life you have a property and the property line. Whatever is inside the property line is your responsibility and you have control over those. If anything bad happens there then you will feel sorrow for that. Boundaries are imaginary lines which mean these are not physical border. So you can decide what to come inside and what to throw out.

What is Boundaries

“Anger is frustration at the fact that we are not God, and do not have control over reality.”

<ol><li>Say 'NO' to bad</li><li>Avoid saying 'NO' to good.</li><li>Respect other's boundaries (when they say 'NO')</li></ol>

Creating Boundaries

"The most basic boundary-setting word is “no.” It lets others know that we exist apart from them and that we are in control of ourselves.”

<ol><li>The Law of Sowing and Reaping</li><li>The Law of Responsibility</li><li>The Law of Power</li><li>The Law of Respect</li><li>The Law of Motivation</li><li>The Law of Evaluation</li><li>The Law of Proactivity</li><li>The Law of Envy</li><li>The Law of Activity</li><li>The Law of Exposure</li></ol>

10 Laws of Boundaries

“You reap whatever you sow. If you sow to your own flesh, you will reap corruption from the flesh; but if you sow to the Spirit, you will reap eternal life from the Spirit” Sometimes, however, people don’t reap what they sow, because someone else steps in and reaps the consequences for them. If every time you overspent, your mother sent you money to cover check overdrafts or high credit-card balances, you wouldn’t reap the consequences of your spendthrift ways.You just need to stop interrupting the law of sowing and reaping in someone’s life.

#1: The Law of Sowing and Reaping

Many times when people hear a talk on boundaries and taking responsibility for their own lives, they say, “That’s so self-centered. We should love one another and deny ourselves.” Or, they actually become selfish and self-centered. Or, they feel “guilty” when they do someone a favor. The Law of Responsibility includes loving others.“Love each other as I have loved you”

#2: The Law of Responsibility

<ol><li>Confession: You have the power to agree with the truth about your problems. </li><li>You have the power to submit your inability to God. </li><li>You have the power to search and ask God and others to reveal more and more about what is within your boundaries.</li><li>Repentance: You have the power to turn from the evil that you find within you. </li><li>You have the power to humble yourself and ask God and others to help you with your developmental injuries and leftover childhood needs.</li><li>You have the power to seek out those that you have injured and make amends.</li></ol>

#3: The Law of Power

“True intimacy is only build around the freedom to disagree.”

We fear that others will not respect our boundaries. We focus on others and lose clarity about ourselves.If we love and respect people who tell us no, they will love and respect our no. Freedom begets freedom.

#4: The Law of Respect

These false motives and others keep us from setting boundaries: <ol><li>Fear of loss of love, or abandonment. </li><li>Fear of others’ anger.</li><li>Fear of loneliness. </li><li>Fear of losing the “good me” inside.</li><li>Guilt</li><li>Payback.</li><li>Approval</li><li> Overidentification with the other’s loss.</li></ol>Freedom first, service second. If you serve to get free of your fear, you are doomed to failure. Let God work on the fears, resolve them, and create some healthy boundaries to guard the freedom you were called to.

#5: The Law of Motivation

You need to evaluate the effects of setting boundaries and be responsible to the other person, but that does not mean you should avoid setting boundaries because someone responds with hurt or anger.We need to evaluate the pain our confrontation causes other people. We need to see how this hurt is helpful to others and sometimes the best thing that we can do for them and the relationship. We need to evaluate the pain in a positive light.

#6: The Law of Evaluation

“Things can hurt and not harm us. In fact they can even be good for us. And things that feel good can be very harmful to us.”

"For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction."Do not try to get to freedom without owning your reactive period and feelings. You do not need to act this out, but you do need to express the feelings. You need to practice and gain assertiveness. You need to get far enough away from abusive people to be able to fence your property against further invasion. And then you need to own the treasures you find in your soul.

#7: The Law of Proactivity

Your envy should always be a sign to you that you are lacking something. At that moment, you should ask God to help you understand what you resent, why you do not have whatever you are envying, and whether you truly desire it. Ask him to show you what you need to do to get there, or to give up the desire.

#8: The Law of Envy

When a baby bird is ready to hatch, if you break the egg for the bird, it will die. The bird must peck its own way out of the egg into the world. This aggressive “workout” strengthens the bird, allowing it to function in the outside world. Robbed of this responsibility, it will die.We must not shrink back passively. Our boundaries can only be created by our being active and aggressive, by our knocking, seeking, and asking

#9: The Law of Activity

A boundary is a property line. It defines where you begin and end. We have been discussing why you need such a line. One reason stands above all the others: You do not exist in a vacuum. You exist in relation to God and others. Your boundaries define you in relation to others.The Law of Exposure says that your boundaries need to be made visible to others and communicated to them in a relationship.﻿

#10: The Law of Exposure

This book will tell about how to set boundaries to our mental world.

Having clear boundaries is essential to a healthy, balanced lifestyle. A boundary is a personal property line that marks those things for which we are responsible. In other words, boundaries define who we are and who we are not. Boundaries impact all areas of our lives: Physical boundaries help us determine who may touch us and under what circumstances -- Mental boundaries give us the freedom to have our own thoughts and opinions -- Emotional boundaries help us to deal with our own emotions and disengage from the harmful, manipulative emotions of others -- Spiritual boundaries help us to distinguish God's will from our own and give us renewed awe for our Creator -- Often, Christians focus so much on being loving and unselfish that they forget their own limits and limitations. When confronted with their lack of boundaries, they ask: - Can I set limits and still be a loving person? - What are legitimate boundaries? - What if someone is upset or hurt by my boundaries? - How do I answer someone who wants my time, love, energy, or money? - Aren't boundaries selfish? - Why do I feel guilty or afraid when I consider setting boundaries? Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend offer biblically-based answers to these and other tough questions, showing us how to set healthy boundaries with our parents, spouses, children, friends, co-workers, and even ourselves.

Dr. Cloud has written or co-written twenty-five books, including the two million-seller Boundaries. His most recent books are Boundaries for Leaders and Necessary Endings. He has earned three Gold Medallion awards, and was awarded the distinguished Retailers Choice award for God Will Make A Way.As president of Cloud-Townsend Resources, Dr. Cloud has produced and conducted hundreds of public seminars around the country. He speaks on relationships—marriage, parenting, dating, personal growth, and spirituality. His seminars are often broadcast live to over two thousand venues at a time.

Henry Cloud

John Townsend is an accomplished writer whose work has resonated with readers around the world. John Townsend has published several books that explore a range of topics, from fiction to nonfiction, and has received critical acclaim for the ability to weave compelling narratives. John Townsend's writing style is known for its depth and authenticity, and has earned quite a loyal following of readers.

John Townsend

Boundaries

Did you know that guilt can affect your health? Negative emotions and thoughts will elevate your adrenaline and cortisol. These are stress hormones that cause our bodies to respond when we encounter threats. But when high levels of these hormones last too long, we get high blood pressure, a rapid heartbeat and inflammation. Don’t do this to yourself! <ul><li>If you’re struggling with this issue , particularly relating to writing, here are 13 ways on how to deal with guilt: </li></ul>

Guilt

<ul><li>And base them on analysis rather than hope or guesswork.</li><li>Setting unrealistic — or unexamined — goals is a huge barrier to success.</li><li>Make your goals small and then hit them out of the park.</li></ul>

1)Make sure your writing goals are reasonable. 

<ul><li>Writing is time-consuming and make sure you allow yourself a reasonable amount of time to get the job done.Instead, as the old expression goes, “under promise and over deliver.”</li><li>Track how long it takes you to write and build in plenty of extra time for researching (first) and editing (later.) </li></ul>

<ul><li>Striving for perfection is totally unrealistic. And, most important, mistakes help us learn. You will learn far more from every screw-up than you will from any laudatory achievement</li><li>Allow yourself to see how a mistake that made you feel guilty has helped you become a better, more skillful writer. Remind yourself that today is a great day to make mistakes. </li></ul>

3)Appreciate the mistakes you make

<ul><li>These people will always find more than one way to make you feel guilty. </li><li>If this person is your boss, seriously think about looking for another job. The market currently favours job seekers over employers.</li></ul>

4)Avoid people who blame, shame and judge. 

<ul><li>You are you. This makes you different from everyone else around you. Decide how much time you’re able to spend researching, writing or editing and start smaller than that. Yes, smaller.</li><li>Even a five-minute-a-day writing habit is infinitely superior to a no-writing-per-day habit. (And five minutes a day is also superior to 35 minutes once a week, even though the volume of time is exactly the same.)</li></ul>

5)Don’t accept the standards and expectations of other people

<ul><li>If you think guilt is stopping you from writing, consider whether the real problem might be fear. Or impatience. Or anger</li><li>Deal with the real problem and the guilt should dissolve.</li></ul>

6)Look for the emotions beneath the guilt. 

<ul><li>If you’ve made a mistake, then apologize for it and figure out how to avoid repeating the problem in the future. Everyone makes mistakes. We’re all human beings.</li></ul>

7)Stop magnifying your guilt. 

<ul><li>We’re all different and we all have our own strengths and weaknesses. Looking at what another person can accomplish will not help you in the least</li><li>Break the bad habit of comparing yourself to others and, instead, focus on competing against the old you</li><li>Did you used to be able to write a 500-word article in 60 minutes? Try to do it in 45. Or 30. That’s the only type of comparison that’s going to be meaningful and useful to you.</li></ul>

8)Stop comparing yourself to others

<ul><li> If you feel guilty about your lack of productivity, you’re not going to be productive at all — you’re far more likely just to be busy.</li><li>Productivity means doing what you really need to do to reach your goals</li></ul>

9)Understand the difference between “busy-ness” and being truly 

<ul><li>I’ve always loved the quote (that’s been attributed to a wide variety of writers): “I believe in inspiration and I see that it’s available at 9 am every day.</li><li>Set up the conditions under which creativity can thrive.</li></ul>

10)Understand that while you can’t force creativity, you need to

<ul><li>Most guilt simply makes us feel bad about ourselves. Instead, figure out how to build a sustainable writing process, so that you can do what you say you’re going to do. </li></ul>

11) Make changes, instead of wallowing in guilt

<ul><li>Of course, you’re responsible for your actions but they don’t make you a bad person. Or a bad writer. In fact, the belief that you’re bad is precisely what contributes to your “bad” behavior.</li><li>Change and learning occur when you recognize you’ve made a mistake, and when you develop a strategy for correcting the problem. An attitude of self-compassion will help (while guilt will usually interfere.)</li></ul>

12)Stop calling yourself a bad person (or a bad writer). 

<ul><li>Torturing yourself won’t make you a better person. Learning will. You may resist examining what you did wrong but performing a thorough analysis of your mistakes is what will help you to stop repeating them.</li><li>Remind yourself: I don’t need to do good all the time to be a good person. </li></ul>You’re a smart, capable person. If you learn how to deal with guilt, you’ll become a much more effective writer.

13)Ask yourself, “what can I learn from this situation?” 

If you’ve never learned how to deal with guilt, make doing so one of your most important goals for 2022…...

productivity

Productivity

writing

Reading & Writing

How to deal with guilt in 13 ways | Publication Coach

Finally, after years of thinking I was merely odd, I have a diagnosis: I'm a "precrastinator".We precrastinators don't put things off until the last minute (well, actually, in other moods, we do that, too, but never mind). Instead, we do things sooner than they really need to be done, even if it costs us more time and energy that way, simply for the feeling of having them over with. I sometimes worry that that'll be my epitaph: "He crossed a lot of items off his to-do list."

What Is A Precrastinator

In the experiment that inspired the term, US researchers gave participants the choice of carrying one of two heavy buckets to the end of an alleyway. One bucket was positioned closer to the finish line, but most people chose the other bucket – the one nearer to them – even though they had to carry it farther, which meant expending more effort. The reason, according to the study's authors, was that the task they'd been given weighed on their minds; they wanted rid of it. "By picking up the near bucket, they could check that task off their mental to-do lists more quickly than if they picked up

And yet those emails do need to be answered, living rooms do need tidying. The best solution I've discovered is to stick to a simple rule: don't clear the decks first, clear them second. If your job permits it, schedule a daily deck-clearing hour – but at 4.30pm, not 9am. Switch your weekends around so that chores get done last (but assign a specific time, otherwise they won't get done at all). And whenever you catch yourself thinking, "Let me just get these little things out of the way first", consider the possibility that you'd be better off not bothering. Some don't need doing at all, while

'The special danger of precrastination is that, unlike procrastination, it doesn't feel naughty,' says Oliver Burkeman

This column will change your life: precrastination

At the beginning of every year, everyone makes resolutions, but it all dies down by early March.  Resolutions have been proven to not work. One reason for this is that they are decided upon by looking at other people's expectations. Resolutions look good on the surface but they are built on what you think you should be doing instead of what you really want to do.

Derailed resolutions

Many resolutions fail because they are not the right ones. This happens because they're based on societal ideals, not yours. They're not specific enough and not supported by a measurable plan. To achieve success, your goals should be reachable and connected to what you value. Be honest with yourself about the reasons behind your desire for change. This will make it easier to commit for the long term.

Get clear on what you want most

After an especially tough year, it's natural to think restarting in the New Year will solve all our problems. This makes it more likely that we'll try to go all-in, causing us to sabotage our efforts. For example, wanting to eat perfectly healthy in the new year and training every day. A smarter approach is to plan ahead. For example, if you want to exercise more, commit to only three days.

Don't mislead yourself with your goal-setting

We enjoy the allure of wanting to excel at something new. However, change is hard, and feeling overconfident does not help. You may find yourself unprepared or ill-equipped to face the reality of the situation. Instead, try to be realistic. Acknowledge that delayed gratification is tough and push yourself when you're tired. Be okay with trying your best.

Don't aim for perfection

Resolutions don't really cause us to change our habits. Instead, it causes us to focus on a specific result rather than addressing the underlying thinking that leads to unhealthy habits. Before starting a new goal, take the time to reflect on the big picture. The changes you make should align with your values.

Do a perspective check

motivationandinspiration

Motivation & Inspiration

New mindsets to approach New Year's resolutions

Andrew Chen writes in his book, The Cold Start Problem: Using Network Effects to Scale Your Product, how companies like Google, Uber, Dropbox, and Tinder use network effects to break through the competition and reach viral growth. Network effects describe how the value of a product or service depends on how many users engage with it. The more users engage, the more desirable it becomes.

How tech giants get so big

Many Silicon Valley startups have become so big because their products connect people. Products like Zoom, Dropbox, GitHub, even Microsoft Office are all different versions of this. Network effects have been around for a long time. Theodore Veil, the chairman of aT&T, stated in 1905 that the phone is useless. Its only value lies in letting you connect with people. It means that you can build a product with all the right features, but if you don't build the network alongside it that lets people connect in the right way, if your coworker's don't use it, your product will not be successful.

The key is to connect people

If two companies both build a note-taking app for personal use, it is one product vs another. But if it's collaboration, whenever one company wins a user, they possibly win their whole sphere of influence as well.

Scaling a minimum viable community

Networks have different underlying structures. The growth of companies like Uber is bound by geography. They are very successful in San Francisco, but that does not help them to gain popularity in London. Companies like Airbnb have a global network effect. A B2B example would be Zoom vs Slack. Zoom is used across organizations, but Slack is within an organisation. Ask yourself what your network looks like. Then consider how many users you need to make the network valuable.

Understanding context

Design your network features thoughtfully. You need to understand what you think your network will look like first. Is it a local network? Or a network more like marketplace companies like eBay?  Decide on how many users you need before the network is valuable. Zoom might be useful with two or three people, Slack with five or ten people in a team. Something like Airbnb or Uber needs hundreds of network participants in a hyperlocal region to work.

Don’t copy-paste other people’s features into your products

Products powered by network effects often follow an S curve. When growth slows down, you will need to find a new product. The Cold Start Theory stages:<ol><li>The problem. How do you get a team to use your product and get excited?</li><li>The tipping point. To get momentum, figure out how to get one team excited about your product so that they spread it to others.</li><li>Escape velocity. Consider how to build your product to spread inside of a company automatically.</li><li>The ceiling. Growth eventually slows down, and you hit saturation.</li><li>The sustainable moat. When everyone has network effects, how will you compete?</li></ol>

Following the S curve

First, you have to figure out the new network product that drives the rest forward. Big companies can easily get millions of people to a product launch, even if it is a bad product. But they may discover that it won’t stick over time.  The solution is to get small groups of people excited about your product, then move from network to network.

Hitting the ceiling

How to get past the "cold start problem" of zero users and build the networks that make your product successful.

Software may be eating the world, but building and scaling products is still quite a challenge. So how do you get past the awkward “cold start problem” of zero users and build the networks that make your product thrive? Andrew Chen, partner at Andreessen Horowitz and author of The Cold Start Problem, joins Intercom Co-Founder and CSO Des Traynor to discuss.You can also listen to Andrew's previous outing on Inside Intercom here: https://www.intercom.com/blog/podcasts/andrew-chen-on-growth/See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

technologyandthefuture

Technology & The Future

podcasts

Podcasts

On Inside Intercom you'll hear the team from Intercom interview makers and do-ers from the worlds of product management, design, startups and marketing.

Inside Intercom

Andrew Chen on how tech’s giants drive growth with network effects

How tech’s giants drive growth with network effects

I’ll tell you a secret. All the best people are. The notion that genius is only thinly separated from insanity goes back at least to ancient Greece. Aristotle linked the two when he said, “There is no great genius without a touch of madness.”*Many of history's most celebrated creative geniuses were mentally ill, from renowned artists Vincent van Gogh and Frida Kahlo to literary giants Virginia Woolf and Edgar Allan Poe.

There Is a Thin Line Between Genius and Insanity?

Current findings of some 20 or 30 scientific studies endorse the notion of the "tortured genius." Of the many varieties of psychosis, creativity appears to be most strongly linked to mood disorders, and especially bipolar disorder. "People with bipolar tend to be creative when they're coming out of deep depression. ""When a bipolar patient's mood improves, his brain activity shifts, too: activity dies down in the lower part of a brain region called the frontal lobe, and flares up in a higher part of that lobe. Amazingly, the very same shift happens when people have bouts of creativity. "

Tortured Genius

Of course, no one is bursting with creative energy during a severe bout of depression or schizophrenia. Above all, these conditions are debilitating and even life-threatening, the scientists said, and although society benefits from the productivity of its tortured geniuses, those individuals don't always consider their moments of brilliance to be worth the extensive suffering.

Suffering  > Brilliance

“There is no great genius without a touch of madness.”* 

Understand yourself and those around you.

psychology

Psychology

creativity

Creativity

Geniuses and Mental illnesses.

People who pursue ideas, who have a form of intelectual curiosity (especially in a digital world) are classified as either nerds or geeks. But the 2 can be separated based on their production capability:- a geek can be a programmer who writes useful code, thus being productive & useful somehow- a nerd is interested in 14th century poetry just for the hell of it, not producing anything useful for others.A dork is someone with no intelectual curiosity and no production capabilities.

Geeks, Nerds .... and Dorks

Everybody has a dream, but nobody has a plan!

John Donovan, author of "The way of man", says masculinity is a combination of 4 traits: honour, strength, courage & mastery. Vincent Harinam proposes a similar triad:<ol><li>Courage: being afraid of doing something but doing it anyway</li><li>Personal Responsibility, verging on extreme ownership: taking responsibility for not only your problems but group and family also.</li><li>Conquest: having a goal bigger than yourself</li></ol>All of the above are based on the meta-skill of emotional control. Does not matter how you feel when you get up in the morning .... there is a job to be done, and real men do it.

What does it mean to be a man?

Is a term coined by Vincent Harinam to describe the perfect man: one that has dark triad characteristics but that is also benevolent. It's a contradictory definition, aiming for a unity of contradictions.The Dark Triad is made up of three traits: Machiavellianism, Narcissism and Psychopathy. They sound negative but it's men with these characteristics that are considered sexy & interesting. A dark gentleman will balance out these attributes with a benevolent triad: Parental Investment, Protection and Provision (providing the goods and making decisions).

Dark Gentleman

Interesting perspectives about what it means to be a man

Vincent Harinam is a data scientist, law enforcement consultant and writer on social phenomenon and the dating market. Between Tinder and OnlyFans, polyamory and Red Pill, incels, simps, sugar daddies and gold diggers, it's difficult to say that romance is alive and well in modern culture. Vincent has written some of the best articles and done huge deep data dives to uncover why the modern dating market is such a mess. Expect to learn why smart women are less likely to get married, why simping is such an unsuccessful dating strategy, how women's modern dating advice is mostly total trash, what Vincent's data uncovered around what women and men look for in a partner, how asymmetries in the dating market can create men who are dangerous for public safety and much more... Sponsors: Join the Modern Wisdom Community to connect with me & other listeners - https://modernwisdom.locals.com/ Get a $5 discount on Magic Spoon’s amazing cereal at https://magicspoon.com/modernwisdom (use code MODERNWISDOM) Get 5 days unlimited access to Shortform for free at https://www.shortform.com/modernwisdom (discount automatically applied) Get 5 Free Travel Packs, Free Liquid Vitamin D and Free Shipping from Athletic Greens at https://athleticgreens.com/modernwisdom (discount automatically applied) Extra Stuff: Check out Vincent's articles - https://quillette.com/author/vincent-harinam/ Get my free Reading List of 100 books to read before you die → https://chriswillx.com/books/ To support me on Patreon (thank you): https://www.patreon.com/modernwisdom #dating #redpill #tinder - 00:00 Intro 00:24 Vincent’s Incredible Writing 04:45 Why Simping Doesn’t Work 10:26 What Does it Mean to be a Man? 16:48 Defining ‘Dark Gentlemen’ 25:50 Why More Men are Single than Women 34:27 Impact of Eugenics in Dating 41:32 Reality of the Gender Wage-gap 47:50 How Casual Sex Misinforms Long-term Relationship Goals 54:09 Should Humanity Return to Polygamy? 1:01:40 The Disney-fication of Relationships 1:14:06 Can Female Competency Be Detrimental in Dating? 1:18:06 Should We Take Marriage More Seriously? 1:24:12 Dealing with Fringe Groups in Society 1:29:13 Where to Find Vincent - Join the Modern Wisdom Community on Locals - https://modernwisdom.locals.com/ Listen to all episodes on audio: Apple Podcasts: https://apple.co/2MNqIgw Spotify: https://spoti.fi/2LSimPn - Get in touch in the comments below or head to... Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chriswillx Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/chriswillx Email: https://chriswillx.com/contact/

loveandrelationships

Love & Relationships

Vincent Harinam is a data scientist, law enforcement consultant and writer on social phenomenon and the dating market.

Between Tinder and OnlyFans, polyamory and Red Pill, incels, simps, sugar daddies and gold diggers, it's difficult to say that romance is alive and well in modern culture. Vincent has written some of the best articles and done huge deep data dives to uncover why the modern dating market is such a mess.

Expect to learn why smart women are less likely to get married, why simping is such an unsuccessful dating strategy, how women's modern dating advice is mostly total trash, what Vincent's data uncovered around what women and men look for in a partner, how asymmetries in the dating market can create men who are dangerous for public safety and much more...

Sponsors:
Join the Modern Wisdom Community to connect with me & other listeners - https://modernwisdom.locals.com/

Get a $5 discount on Magic Spoon’s amazing cereal at https://magicspoon.com/modernwisdom (use code MODERNWISDOM)

Get 5 days unlimited access to Shortform for free at https://www.shortform.com/modernwisdom (discount automatically applied)

Get 5 Free Travel Packs, Free Liquid Vitamin D and Free Shipping from Athletic Greens at https://athleticgreens.com/modernwisdom (discount automatically applied)

Extra Stuff:
Check out Vincent's articles - https://quillette.com/author/vincent-harinam/ 
Get my free Reading List of 100 books to read before you die → https://chriswillx.com/books/
To support me on Patreon (thank you): https://www.patreon.com/modernwisdom

#dating #redpill #tinder

-

00:00 Intro
00:24 Vincent’s Incredible Writing
04:45 Why Simping Doesn’t Work
10:26 What Does it Mean to be a Man?
16:48 Defining ‘Dark Gentlemen’
25:50 Why More Men are Single than Women
34:27 Impact of Eugenics in Dating
41:32 Reality of the Gender Wage-gap
47:50 How Casual Sex Misinforms Long-term Relationship Goals
54:09 Should Humanity Return to Polygamy?
1:01:40 The Disney-fication of Relationships 
1:14:06 Can Female Competency Be Detrimental in Dating? 
1:18:06 Should We Take Marriage More Seriously?
1:24:12 Dealing with Fringe Groups in Society
1:29:13 Where to Find Vincent

-

Join the Modern Wisdom Community on Locals - https://modernwisdom.locals.com/

Listen to all episodes on audio:
Apple Podcasts: https://apple.co/2MNqIgw
Spotify: https://spoti.fi/2LSimPn

-

Get in touch in the comments below or head to...
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chriswillx 
Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/chriswillx
Email: https://chriswillx.com/contact/

Bonjour I'm Chris, Host of the Modern Wisdom Podcast. Understanding the world is hard, this channel should help.

Chris Williamson

Why Is The Modern Dating Market A Mess? - Vincent Harinam | Modern Wisdom Podcast 410

Vincent Harinam on manhood

Most people have wondered if there is life beyond Earth in space. With all of the countless billions of stars and possible planets and moons in space, many people think that under the right conditions, life can exist elsewhere in space. However, there is no evidence for this yet. NASA is operating or planning several missions which will search for evidence of life on Mars, on the moons of Jupiter and Saturn, and which will search for Earth-like planets around other stars. Other projects, like SETI, are scanning the sky for signals from intelligent life in outer space.

Is In Life In Outer Space? 

#shorts #space #facts Is there life in outer space? Most people have wondered if there is life beyond Earth in space. With all of the countless billions of stars and possible planets and moons in space, many people think that under the right conditions, life can exist elsewhere in space. However, there is no evidence for this yet. NASA is operating or planning several missions which will search for evidence of life on Mars, on the moons of Jupiter and Saturn, and which will search for Earth-like planets around other stars. Other projects, like SETI, are scanning the sky for signals from intelligent life in outer space. One day these projects may discover life in outer space. Know more about…  Space : https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLO6kTsDI4xfnAISJIMWKxkPoL9qoU9Hwv General knowledge : https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLO6kTsDI4xfn6hHfyZBGiw-atw0its-7Q Science & Technology : https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLO6kTsDI4xfmONVgfMhMbstBLpZuyJCP2 Health : https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLO6kTsDI4xflrlYCGE0EIyWXoBoNG81-r 🙏Requests🙏  I requested to you (My viewers) please subscribe to my channel and if you like video then please press like button.All youtubers are doing hard work in video making and your like, Share, Subscribes are fruits for our hard works.   You also follow me on: -  Facebook: www.facebook.com/thetechers You can visit my Website : www.knowledgevaccination.blogspot.com This video is under Fair Use: Copyright Disclaimer Under Section 107 of the Copyright Act in 1976;  Allowance is made for "Fair Use" for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research.  Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing.  Non - profit, educational or personal use tips the balance in favor of fair use.  All rights and credit go directly to its rightful owners.  No copyright infringement intended. Sound credit : The Cosmos Video Credit : storyblocks Thank you all of you...🙏

leadershipandmanagement

Leadership & Management

#shorts #space #facts
Is there life in outer space?
Most people have wondered if there is life beyond Earth in space. With all of the countless billions of stars and possible planets and moons in space, many people think that under the right conditions, life can exist elsewhere in space. However, there is no evidence for this yet. NASA is operating or planning several missions which will search for evidence of life on Mars, on the moons of Jupiter and Saturn, and which will search for Earth-like planets around other stars. Other projects, like SETI, are scanning the sky for signals from intelligent life in outer space. One day these projects may discover life in outer space.

Know more about… 

Space : https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLO6kTsDI4xfnAISJIMWKxkPoL9qoU9Hwv


General knowledge : https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLO6kTsDI4xfn6hHfyZBGiw-atw0its-7Q


Science & Technology : https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLO6kTsDI4xfmONVgfMhMbstBLpZuyJCP2


Health : https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLO6kTsDI4xflrlYCGE0EIyWXoBoNG81-r


🙏Requests🙏 

I requested to you (My viewers) please subscribe to my channel and if you like video then please press like button.All youtubers are doing hard work in video making and your like, Share, Subscribes are fruits for our hard works.

 

You also follow me on: - 

Facebook: www.facebook.com/thetechers

You can visit my Website : www.knowledgevaccination.blogspot.com


This video is under Fair Use: Copyright Disclaimer Under Section 107 of the Copyright Act in 1976;  Allowance is made for "Fair Use" for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research.  Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing.  Non - profit, educational or personal use tips the balance in favor of fair use.  All rights and credit go directly to its rightful owners.  No copyright infringement intended.


Sound credit : The Cosmos

Video Credit : storyblocks

Thank you all of you...🙏

Hi Friends,
In this channel, We provide you with Facts about Latest Space, Science & Technology research and information, Research based Health-related facts, General Knowledge facts, and many more. Your Information, Our Responsibility. 
Here I research a lot to make one video and Compress it in only 1-10 minutes video to gives you an instant knowledge boost. 
So friends Subscribe to my channel and watch my videos. Also, press the Bell icon to get new video notifications. And if you like videos, don't hesitate to tell your friends to subscribe to my channel. 
Because The Knowledge is Infinite.
Thank you in advance.

Sudhir Talati

Is there life in outer space? #shorts

Stress is <a href="https://www.lexico.com/en/definition/stress">defined</a> as “mental or emotional strain resulting from adverse or demanding circumstances.” We’ve all felt it, but where does stress come from?Humans are unique in our capacity to predict what might happen next. We rely on our amazing ability to anticipate the future better than any other animal, and this ability is a feature of our unusual intelligence.Unlike other animals, which (as far as we know) react solely to what’s going on in their environment, humans can imagine entire realities in our heads. These alternate realities make us act in all sorts of strange ways.

The Origin Of Stress

While imagining the future motivates us to pursue what we want, it also comes with a cost. All that thinking about what might happen next is stressful.What if I told you that same powerful difference in focus and mindset is impacting you right now?You’re about to learn how to create a real-life forcefield against the stress you face every day.

Just Our Imagination

The stress we experience is based on our perception of what’s going to happen next. If we anticipate a threatening situation, our body releases stress hormones to prepare us to face the threat.But if we believe we have control over a threatening stimulus, then we don’t need to prepare for that threat in the same way. We don’t need to be on full alert with the fight-or-flight response gearing us up for survival.

The Power Of Control: What Will Happen Next

This change in focus—from the many uncontrollable aspects of life to the few controllable ones—can have a profound effect. That’s because our perception of reality is, to a large extent, created by the focus of our attention.

The Change In Focus

Our human tendency is to focus on threats and problems. For the sake of our emotional wellness, it makes sense to modify that automatic tendency. You can’t control the stressors that come your way, but you can influence the focus of your own attention. That’s why we recommend you focus on the things that give you back a feeling of control.Want another tool to combat stress? Counterintuitively, one of the best things we can add to your toolbelt is an entirely different belief about stress—one befriending it instead of battling against it.

What You Can Control

When people believed stress was something bad that must be avoided, it had a far worse impact on their health. In contrast, among those who perceive stress as a normal part of pursuing goals, there was no correlation between higher stress and poor health outcomes.

What You Believe

Feeling out of control makes us feel even more stress, perpetuating the harmful cycle. Perhaps it’s time to consider an alternative view of stress. What if we stopped seeing stress as something abnormal or threatening to your future health and instead thought of it as something that empowers us to be our best?

The Alternate View

Stress comes from anxiety about future problems and the lack of control over them. This article introduces a few surprising techniques to handle stress.

How to Turn Off Harmful Stress Like a Switch

Find  Self Improvement Tips - Curated from popular Books like Atomic Habits, 48 Rules of Power, Deep Work, Rich Dad Poor Dad and way more!