Why is it so hard to forgive an ex? - Deepstash

Bite-sized knowledge

to upgrade

your career

Ideas from books, articles & podcasts.

created 8 ideas

BBC

Why is it so hard to forgive an ex?

Why is it so hard to forgive an ex?

bbc.com

STASHED IN:

19.3K reads

Rekindling Of An Old Flame

Breakups and subsequent renewals are quite common across all types of romantic relationships and even marriages.

Falling apart and then seeking to mend the old relationship seems to be deeply rooted in our psychology.

When people experience breakups they go through the ‘protest’ phase initially, and the rejected lover becomes obsessed with winning back the person who has quit the relationship.

Rejection, paradoxically, makes the rejected person love the partner even more. This is called a ‘Frustrati...

The rejected lover experiences high levels of dopamine and norepinephrine in the brain, and are visibly stressed out. These chemical reactions trigger many to do crazy things to win their ex back. Such feelings are erased quickly if the lover starts dating a new partner.

Some people also f...

Attachment Theory

  • Secure attachment is caused by healthy emotional communication.
  • Lovers who are anxious and insecure tend to have low self-esteem.
  • Avoidance of attachment is done by lovers who are emotionally unavailable and self-sufficient.

They play an important part in moving towards forgiveness. A bad present relationship (or lack of it) makes the lover remember the good times with the ‘known devil’, with feelings of loss and grief surfacing. Lovers who are now single have stronger desires to get back to their ex, as they fear th...

Post-relationship relations are a thing, with the ex doing all kinds of things like ghosting, orbiting, benching and zombieing their past lovers. Social media makes breakups visible, so any broken relation has the necessary audience to play out the post-breakup games.

They take the breakup game seriously, and are vulnerable to anxiety, depression and even suicide, due to a lack of understanding of life and the public nature of their relationships.

The smartphones and tablets that seem to be surgically attached to them right from birth are a cause of the...

  • One of the popular ways to move on in a relationship is to not contact the person for 30,60 or 90 days, even forever, to help mend a broken heart.
  • Social media posts of the ex are to be avoided.
  • Time heals everything, and it would also help to get busy doing something int...

17 Reactions

Comment

It's time to

READ

LIKE

A PRO!

Jump-start your

reading habits

, gather your

knowledge

,

remember what you read

and stay ahead of the crowd!

Takes just 5 minutes a day.


TRY THE DEEPSTASH APP

+2M Installs

4.7 App Score