<ul><li>Scammers prey on our biggest fears and strongest desires</li><li>They get better all the time, so it's worth your time to learn how to recognize their tactics.</li><li>The mediums scammers use may change, but many of the underlying strategies stay the same - which means the recommendations for how to protect yourself from them do too.</li></ul>

Scammers Get Smarter

<ul><li>In almost every case, a legitimate message doesn't need you to respond within the next 30 seconds.</li><li>Take that 30 seconds to calm down and think before you click anything.</li><li>Scammers know that emotions make their job easier - which is why so many scams start with urgent messages asking you to do something immediately..</li></ul>

Scammers Create Urgency

<ul><li>If you get a message or call you weren't expecting and don't know, the best thing to do is ignore it.</li><li>Even what appears to be a perfectly innocent wrong number text could be something more insidious.</li><li>Block the number and move on with your life.</li></ul>

Do Not Engage, Just Ignore

<ul><li>90 percent of cyberattacks are the result of successful phishing schemes</li><li>A hacker tricks victims into thinking they’re a trusted or known source to give their sensitive information</li><li>Use an authenticator app or two-factor authentication for your important accounts like primary email.</li><li>Scammers love to use social media to find victims</li></ul>

Don't Give Out Your Password

<ul><li>Always check where a link is taking you before clicking on it.</li><li>Only go to websites you trust.</li><li>Don't enter any of your sensitive information - like your credit card, social security number, or your password - on a site if you are not absolutely sure it is what you think it is.</li></ul>

Check The Link

Overpayment scams - when someone sends you more money than you were expecting and then asks you to give them back the difference - have stood the test of time. Payment apps have made it even easier.If you're the recipient of extra or unexpected funds, don’t just send the money back to wherever it came from, even if the sender gives you a convincing sob story for why you should. The best thing to do is contact the payment app and deal with the matter through them.

Overpayment Scams: Sending You More Money To Bank Rob You

<ul><li>Crypto is a volatile and unregulated market that is a prime target for scammers and hackers</li><li>If you don't understand how it works, don't get involved in it</li><li>Many people are getting scammed through some of the oldest tricks</li><li>It's easy enough to lose money in "legitimate" crypto investments</li></ul>

Avoid Crypto

<ul><li>One way to avoid getting scammed is to preemptively protect your accounts from your mistakes as much as possible.</li><li>Set up two-factor authentication and use different passwords via a password manager.</li><li>You can lock things down even more by using hardware authenticators and anti-malware software.</li><li>At a certain point, your security measures might feel like more trouble than they're worth. It is a small price to pay, than to lose your earnings online in a split second.</li></ul>

Protect Your Accounts

Anyone can fall for online scams — even you. Here’s how to avoid them.

parenting

Parenting

technologyandthefuture

Technology & The Future

cybersecurity

Cybersecurity

You should start thinking about career paths, family, and overall goals for your life in order to start working towards them.Your 20’s is the time when people are more willing you give you opportunities. if you don’t start now when you are seeking for those opportunities people will ask why you didn’t start sooner

How You Should Start Planning In Your 20’s 

Many people will often choose a job that isn’t getting them capital. capital is the experience you gain from a job related to the field you want to enter, or something that will make your resume more solidified. when you gain Capital you gain self efficacy. You’re now more sure of yourself because of your past experience.when facing a choice between a job like a barista that may pay more vs an internship that may not pay as much choose the intership because you’re gaining capital.capital will get you more experience more connections and will make it easier for you to move up in that industry.

Career Objectives 

We often surround ourselves with people who are like us. this means that many times we’re not learning as much as we could be. Weak ties are people that are only your acquaintances, and maybe you don’t really know them or hang out with them.“weak ties promote, and sometimes even force, thoughtful growth and change.”weak ties will often have a network that you don’t have access to. By connecting with a weak tie you now have access to the weak ties network. Our connections narrow are we grow older and busier. Take advantage of those ties now.

Take Advantage Of Your Weak Ties 

Many people in their 20s think they have their whole life ahead of them. They think I’ll worry about family when I’m 30.this type of thinking is problematic. Our bodies are not designed to wait too long to have children. As age increases so does the challenges of having kids.when you start searching for a partner in your 20s you’re able to make better decisions about who your partner is without risking the ability to have children.when you wait too long its easy to settle for anyone because you’re running out of time to form a family.“other things may change us be we start and end with family”

Start Thinking Of Family 

It’s important to start planning out your life when you have most access to resources and time is on your side. 

New York Times bestselling psychologist Dr. Meg Jay uses real stories from real lives to provide smart, compassionate, and constructive advice about the crucial (and difficult) years we cannot afford to miss. Our "thirty-is-the-new-twenty" culture tells us the twentysomething years don't matter. Some say they are a second adolescence. Others call them an emerging adulthood. Dr. Meg Jay, a clinical psychologist, argues that twentysomethings have been caught in a swirl of hype and misinformation, much of which has trivialized what is actually the most defining decade of adulthood. Drawing from almost two decades of work with hundreds of clients and students, The Defining Decade weaves the latest science of the twentysomething years with the behind-closed-doors stories from twentysomethings, themselves. The result is a provocative read that provides the tools necessary to make the most of your twenties, and shows us how work, relationships, personality, social networks, identity, and even the brain can change more during this decade than at any other time in adulthood—if we use the time wisely. The Defining Decade is a smart, compassionate and constructive book about the years we cannot afford to miss.

career

Career

The Defining Decade has changed the way millions of twentysomethings think about their twenties—and themselves. Revised and reissued for a new generation, let it change how you think about you and yours.Our "thirty-is-the-new-twenty" culture tells us the twentysomething years don't matter. Some say they are an extended adolescence. Others call them an emerging adulthood. In The Defining Decade, Meg Jay argues that twentysomethings have been caught in a swirl of hype and misinformation, much of which has trivialized the most transformative time of our lives.Drawing from more than two decades of work with thousands of clients and students, Jay weaves the latest science of the twentysomething years with behind-closed-doors stories from twentysomethings themselves. The result is a provocative read that provides the tools necessary to take the most of your twenties, and shows us how work, relationships, personality, identity and even the brain can change more during this decade than at any other time in adulthood—if we use the time well. Also included in this updated edition: <ul><li>Up-to-date research on work, love, the brain, friendship, technology, and fertility</li><li>What a decade of device use has taught us about looking at friends—and looking for love—online</li><li>29 conversations to have with your partner—or to keep in mind as you search for one</li><li>A social experiment in which "digital natives" go without their phones</li><li>A Reader's Guide for book clubs, classrooms, or further self-reflection</li></ul>

Meg Jay is an accomplished writer whose work has resonated with readers around the world. Meg Jay has published several books that explore a range of topics, from fiction to nonfiction, and has received critical acclaim for the ability to weave compelling narratives. Meg Jay's writing style is known for its depth and authenticity, and has earned quite a loyal following of readers.

Meg Jay

The Defining Decade

Cyberbullying is bullying that happens through digital devices such as phones or computers. It often happens over social media, text, email, instant messages, and gaming. Cyberbullying often takes the form of sending or sharing harmful or mean content about someone to embarrass them. Sometimes this content is shared anonymously, making cyberbullying feel even more threatening.

What is Cyberbullying?

Some facts about the usage of our devices:Because of the COVID-19 pandemic lockdowns, people around the world, including kids, are spending 20 percent more time on social media than they were pre-pandemic.71 percent of U.S. parents with a child age 11 or younger are concerned that their child might spend too much time in front of screens, according to the Pew Research Center.70 percent of parents estimated that their kids spend at least four hours a day with screens. Before the pandemic, 60 percent of parents estimated that their kids spent three hours or less in front of screens.

Increased Screen Time

According to the <a href="https://www.security.org/digital-safety/cyberbullying-covid/#references">cyberbullying research</a>, in which they studied parents of kids between the ages of 10 and 18, 21 percent of children have been cyberbullied.As of January 2020, 44 percent of all internet users in the U.S. said they have experienced online harassment. Of all the social networks, kids on YouTube are the most likely to be cyberbullied at 79 percent, followed by Snapchat at 69 percent, TikTok at 64 percent, and Facebook at 49 percent. And as a child’s age increased, so did the likelihood of cyberbullying.

Prevalence Of Cyber Bullying

<ul><li>Over half of teens felt angry after being cyberbullied, about a third felt hurt, and nearly 15 percent felt scared.<a href="https://www.security.org/resources/cyberbullying-facts-statistics/#resources">5 </a> </li><li>Two-thirds of tween victims of cyberbullying said that it had a negative impact on how they felt about themselves. </li><li>Nearly a third of tween cyberbullying victims said the incidents affected their friendships, while 13 percent said it affected their physical health.<a href="https://www.security.org/resources/cyberbullying-facts-statistics/#resources">6 </a> </li> </ul>

<ul><li>The most effective way to <a href="https://www.security.org/resources/protecting-kids-online/">prevent cyberbullying </a>, teens say, is to block the bully, according to the National Crime Prevention Council. </li><li>Out of teenage cyberbullying victims: <ul><li>36 percent asked the bully to stop cyberbullying them. </li><li>34 percent blocked all communication with the bully. </li><li>29 percent did nothing. </li><li>11 percent talked to their parents about the incidents. </li> </ul> </li><li>Almost two-thirds of tweens said that they tried to help someone who was being bullied online, and 30 percent had tried to help multiple times, according to the Cyberbullying Research Center. </li> </ul>

What To Do? Take Action

Some interesting facts on how bullying became more digital over the last years

Understand yourself and those around you.

psychology

Psychology

artsandculture

Society, Arts & Culture

Cyberbullying: Twenty Crucial Statistics for 2022 - Security.org

Each people are giants in their own circle (leaders in team, coach, father in family). And this made each one of us should do self introspection to see our best and worst qualities as these may impact people that look us as 'giants'.Find your views on success, find your unconscious bias and pay attention how you response to the peoplewho have different views or you have bias on. As you understand that your action as 'giants' may impact others, you will also need to consider on what you promise and filter your feedback, as what you do may eventually build a culture.

We Are a Giant and What We Need to Do About It

People need to understand themself and how they impact other people in their circle.

"THE MOST UNLIKELY OF PEOPLE, IN THE MOST IMPROBABLE OF CIRCUMSTANCES, CAN BECOME EXTRAORDINARY." WE NEED MORE LEADERS. From socio-political chaos and workplace disruption to the climate change crisis, we have never needed people with the skill and will to collaborate to create a better world more than now. We need people who are willing to fill the leadership void. People who will embrace the influence they have. People who believe in improving society and workplace culture - not only because it makes life better, but because it is proven to yield positive results. The Promises of Giants is a challenge to anyone who aspires to make a difference in their environment. Over fourteen promises, it seamlessly intertwines personal anecdotes and workplace and social observation with the latest research, to provide practical, proven tips and strategies to empower you to maximize your own potential and inspire others. It is not a self-help book. It is a how-to guide for winning, rooted in the belief that the most unlikely of people, in the most improbable of circumstances, can become extraordinary. John Amaechi well understands the responsibilities and potential that come with being a giant. The Promises of Giants is the product of a lifetime spent observing and studying effective leadership - from accompanying his mother's visits to her dying patients to competing at the highest levels of professional sport, through two decades of management consulting with multinational corporations. These experiences have shown that everyone has the ability to act decisively to influence the world in a positive way. Everyone is a giant to someone.

personaldevelopment

Personal Development

books

Books

leadershipandmanagement

Leadership & Management

"THE MOST UNLIKELY OF PEOPLE, IN THE MOST IMPROBABLE OF CIRCUMSTANCES, CAN BECOME EXTRAORDINARY." WE NEED MORE LEADERS. From socio-political chaos and workplace disruption to the climate change crisis, we have never needed people with the skill and will to collaborate to create a better world more than now. We need people who are willing to fill the leadership void. People who will embrace the influence they have. People who believe in improving society and workplace culture - not only because it makes life better, but because it is proven to yield positive results. The Promises of Giants is a challenge to anyone who aspires to make a difference in their environment. Over fourteen promises, it seamlessly intertwines personal anecdotes and workplace and social observation with the latest research, to provide practical, proven tips and strategies to empower you to maximize your own potential and inspire others. It is not a self-help book. It is a how-to guide for winning, rooted in the belief that the most unlikely of people, in the most improbable of circumstances, can become extraordinary. John Amaechi well understands the responsibilities and potential that come with being a giant. The Promises of Giants is the product of a lifetime spent observing and studying effective leadership - from accompanying his mother's visits to her dying patients to competing at the highest levels of professional sport, through two decades of management consulting with multinational corporations. These experiences have shown that everyone has the ability to act decisively to influence the world in a positive way. Everyone is a giant to someone.

John Amaechi

The Promises of Giants

Imagine John, an honest employee whose colleague is a bigot and a harasser of women. From their first interaction, John didn’t like the way his coworker made inappropriate jokes. He recently called John ‘too soft’ after John declined his proposal to steal from their company to make some ‘extra money’. While he might never openly admit to hating anyone, John privately thinks to himself: This guy represents the worst in our society; I hope something bad happens to him and he goes away; I hate him.

The Pleasure of Hate

What does it mean to say that someone like John hates his coworker, rather than just disliking or feeling contempt for him? People claim to ‘hate’ all sorts of things in their daily lives: drama, traffic jams, math, broccoli, Mondays. But if they are asked about other people, especially specific individuals and groups, feelings of hate are usually not disclosed so easily. Hate is a heavy subject. When trying to understand prejudice, terrorism or genocide, people cannot help but think of hate as one of the primary causes.

Hate is a Heavy Subject

Currently, there is no consensus among scholars about hate’s nature. Hate has been described widely as an emotion, but also as an attitude or a sentiment. Some scholars think that hate is an extreme version of anger or dislike; some describe hate as a blend of emotions such as anger, contempt and disgust; and others regard hate as a distinct and unique feeling. Theories also diverge in their descriptions of hate’s antecedents, triggers, functions and behavioural outcomes. Nevertheless, people confidently talk about hate speech, hate crime, or anti-hate campaigns.

An Emotion, an Attitude, a Sentiment?

What we do know is that hate is intense and enduring, and it seems to be based on a view of its targets as essentially bad and threatening. For example, when the Hutus slaughtered the Tutsis in the Rwanda genocide of 1994, the hate they experienced appears to have been based on the perception that the Tutsis were essentially evil and that they should be eliminated. The hate embodied by the Ku Klux Klan and other extremist groups often goes back decades or longer, transcending generations and sometimes lying dormant until finding a new trigger.

Intense and Enduring

We also know that people can hate close individuals such as family members, friends or romantic partners. Still, there is a lack of empirical research examining hate’s distinctive features, partly because studying hate is methodologically difficult and research ethics boards are not very happy about inducing feelings of hate in study participants. So I recently set out to investigate how the feeling of hate is different from dislike, anger, contempt and disgust, conducting a series of <a href="https://doi.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2Femo0001056">studies</a> with Jan-Willem van Prooijen and Paul Van Lange at the Vrije Universiteit Amsterdam.

A Series of Studies

We asked participants in the US to anonymously describe their own experiences of feeling each of these negative emotions, either toward an individual or a group. They rated the emotional intensity and duration of each experience, how threatening they perceived the individual or group to be, and other dimensions of the experience. Under the condition of anonymity, most people openly described individuals and groups they hate – often with a cathartic level of detail – suggesting that experiencing hate is more frequent in people’s lives than we might imagine.

The Experience

Our key finding is that, across the different dimensions, hate seems most distinct from dislike and anger, somewhat less distinct from contempt, and least distinct from disgust. For instance, compared with dislike, anger or contempt (not disgust), participants rated their experiences of hate as more intense. And compared with dislike or anger toward specific individuals, they rated their experiences of hate as more enduring, perceived hated individuals as more threatening to society, and expressed a greater inclination to engage in behaviours such as confronting, harming or offending them.

Key Findings

People also perceived hated individuals as more threatening to them personally than individuals toward whom they felt other negative emotions. These findings suggest that hate is a distinct feeling, but also that it shares some features with the other emotions, especially with contempt and disgust. What explains these differences between hate and other negative emotions? The answer might lie partly in the reasons for which each emotion has evolved, and in the particular ways in which people see the targets of each emotion.

A Distinct Feeling

Negative emotions are thought to have evolved as goal-oriented mechanisms that help individuals to coordinate their physiological, cognitive and behavioural systems for dealing with different threats. Dislike is a broad negative affective state that guides people’s preferences. When people dislike someone, that does not mean they necessarily wish to harm that person. Rather, they simply prefer not to be near them.

Goal-Oriented Mechanisms

Although hate, too, is a negative affective state, it implies that one really wants the other person out of one’s life completely (as in the case of John, who wishes his coworker would disappear), and might be willing to take steps to make that happen.When we compare hate with anger, contempt and disgust, the differences are a bit more nuanced. People get angry when others misbehave, and the anger is aimed at changing the behaviour of the misbehaving person in the short-term.

Differences

For example, if somebody lights a cigarette in a non-smoking area, people around might get angry, and their overt expression of anger (via direct remarks or body language) could induce the smoker to put out the cigarette or leave. However, unlike anger, hate seems to be aimed not at the targets’ behaviours, per se, but at the targets themselves (ie, who they are or what they represent). Hate’s goal is therefore not to change the target’s behaviours but to get rid of the targets, based on the perception that they are essentially bad and unchangeable.

Hate's Goal

That is likely one reason why people tend to experience hate for significantly longer periods of time than anger, which often dissipates relatively quickly once the unwanted behaviours cease.Contempt and disgust are, like hate, focused on an individual’s or group’s disposition. Contempt consists of ‘looking down’ at others or viewing them as inferior, and its goal is to derogate and exclude them. Disgust is evoked when people appraise others as immoral or undesirable, and the goal of disgust is to avoid or distance oneself from them.

Group's Disposition

When people feel hate, however, the targets are not just perceived as inferior, immoral or undesirable, although they might be perceived as all of these. There is something else, something about them that motivates an especially strong reaction, to the point of wanting to eliminate them physically or symbolically (such as by eliminating a group’s symbols, in the case of intergroup hate), rather than only excluding or avoiding them.

A Stronger Reaction

So, what is it that people find so threatening about the targets of their hate? In a set of studies currently under review, we tested whether hate was triggered to a higher degree by threats to people’s resources and goals or by threats to their values and worldviews. We found that participants expressed significantly more hate toward individuals endorsing views that were opposite to their own on issues such as abortion, the legalisation of drugs, or same-sex marriage than toward individuals who blocked their goals and caused them to lose a reward.

The Hate's Targets

This could indicate that at least part of what people find particularly aversive about their hate targets is the perception that those individuals or groups endorse the opposite of what they believe is fair, noble and right, or their idea of what is a good life or a good society.These beliefs are part and parcel of people’s identities, which adds an extra, threatening ingredient. People can dislike aspects of a person, or get temporarily angry at their behaviours, but hate seems to be related to fundamental and non-negotiable disagreements in core moral beliefs.

Moral Beliefs

While these disagreements could be present to some degree when people feel emotions such as contempt and disgust (helping to explain their closeness to hate), when people feel hate, these moral differences might be taken as personal threats, based on the importance of people’s values and beliefs to their sense of who they are. This could fuel a heightened emotional experience and prepare individuals for attacking rather than avoiding their targets.Having a clear idea of what hate means and what its dynamics are is essential for identifying and responding to it.

Moral Differences

For instance, political ideologies that capitalise on identity threats, or on the supposedly evil character of certain groups, might be instilling much more than anger among followers – sowing the seeds for long-term aggression and fostering social division. Policymakers who are conscious of this might make stronger efforts to combat the spread of hate-triggering narratives and raise awareness among citizens.

Policymakers's Efforts

A clearer conceptualisation of hate might also, by extension, contribute to a better understanding of related concepts such as hate speech or hate crime, providing tools for legal actions or anti-hate initiatives. There is much more to learn about this strong negative emotion, but we are developing a better sense of what, in fact, it means to feel hate.------Cristhian A Martínezis a PhD candidate at the department of Experimental and Applied Psychology at Vrije Universiteit Amsterdam. His research focuses on understanding how people respond to transgressions insocial and political spheres.

Cristhian A Martínezis 

How does hating someone compare with anger, contempt or disgust? A clearer picture of what makes it unique is emerging

communication

Communication

loveandrelationships

Love & Relationships

What makes hate a unique emotion – and why that matters | Psyche Ideas

However, children are sophisticated thinkers and more capable of abstract thought. In some ways, kids make better philosophers than adults because they question things grown-ups take for granted and are open to new ideas. The late philosopher Gareth Matthews was one of the first people to notice this. Unlike Piaget, who supposed that children can't yet use logic, Matthews found that kids can reason in subtle ways from the ages of 3 to 7.

Children are capable of abstract thought

Kids are constantly puzzled by the world. They always want to know how or why. Kids are also not concerned if they'll make mistakes or seem silly as they try and figure things out. Developmental psychologists are catching on to kids’ capabilities. Children aren't just "primitive grownups gradually attaining perfection and complexity." Their minds are complex and powerful. If we can sustain kids’ curiosity, they might become more discerning adults.

Every child is a philosopher and often some of the best

For adults to become better thinkers, they only have to talk to children and take them seriously. Children's well-placed why's can push you past your ability to explain everyday things and help you question truths you hold dear. They can even help you see the world in a new way.

Kids can help adults become better thinkers

Developmental psychologists are catching on that children from age 3 - 7 are often more capable of complex thought than previously thought. Adults can tap into that by actively talking and listening to them. 

Adults have a lot to learn from the questions only children are willing to ask.

creativity

Creativity

Why Kids Make the Best Philosophers

A general definition is the attitude of complete acceptance and love, whether for yourself or for someone else. When you have UPR for someone, nothing they can do could give you a reason to stop seeing them as inherently human and inherently lovable. It does not mean that you accept each and every action taken by the person, but that you accept who they are at a level much deeper than surface behavior (Rogers, 1951).

Defintion Of Unconditional Positive Regard

“One is loved because one is loved. No reason is needed for loving.”

“The greatest gift that you can give to others is the gift of unconditional love and acceptance.”

We all have two instinctual urges and desires, based on innate human needs and instincts, that make UPR an effective tool:<ul><li>The drive towards socially constructive behavior, meaning interacting effectively and positively with others.</li><li>The need for self-determination, or the right and responsibility to choose one’s own path.</li></ul>When the clients need for self-determination feels respected, and the therapist adopts the attitude that the client is doing the best they can, the client is more likely to allow their urge towards socially constructive behavior to drive their decisions and actions.

The Psychology Behind Unconditional Positive Regard

“People are just as wonderful as sunsets if you let them be. When I look at a sunset, I don’t find myself saying, ‘Soften the orange a bit on the right hand corner.’ I don’t try to control a sunset. I watch with awe as it unfolds.”

“When the other person is hurting, confused, troubled, anxious, alienated, terrified; or when he or she is doubtful of self-worth, uncertain as to identity, then understanding is called for. The gentle and sensitive companionship of an empathic stance… provides illumination and healing. In such situations deep understanding is, I believe, the most precious gift one can give to another.”

“When a person realizes he has been deeply heard, his eyes moisten. I think in some real sense he is weeping for joy. It is as though he were saying, ‘Thank God, somebody heard me. Someone knows what it’s like to be me."

One of the best representations of UPR in therapy sessions is a scenario in which the client shares thoughts, feelings, or behaviors with the therapist that are considered morally wrong or simply unacceptable.In this case, the therapist can display unconditional acceptance by asking the client about their feelings and what they believe drove the thought or behavior rather than focusing on how the client’s actions would hurt someone else or on the illegality or immorality of the action.

Unconditional Positive Regard In Counselling

For another example, therapists have the opportunity to display UPR when a client shares a habit or behavior with the therapist that is self-detrimental or self-harmful, such as abusing drugs or alcohol, cutting, or binge-eating. Instead of chiding the client for this behavior or ignoring its potential to harm, the therapist might help the client realize that the behavior is harmful while simultaneously assuring the client that they are worthy of love and self-care and that they deserve to have a healthy and happy life.

“I don’t want you to save me. I want you to stand by my side as I save myself.”

You can repeat these sayings as a twist on the usual self-focus of mantras or affirmations:<ul><li>“My child’s worth is non-negotiable and does not need to be earned.”</li><li>“I approve of my child without condition, although I may not approve of all the choices my child makes.”</li><li>“I give my child permission to make mistakes and I believe in his/her ability to learn from them.”</li><li>“I believe in my child’s ability to become who they are meant to be.”</li><li>“I am here to help, understand, and provide guidelines—not to criticize.”</li></ul>

Cultivate Your Own Attitude

“You don’t need someone to complete you. You only need someone to accept you completely.”

Guidance for teachers and parents on how to implement UPR and encourage the development of a child’s self-worth and self-esteem.<ul><li>Giving the child honest recognition for their success and achievement.</li><li>Offering specific (as opposed to overly general) praise for their good decisions and actions.</li><li>Respecting the child by offering them choices, abiding by their decisions, and explaining the reasoning behind our own decisions.</li><li>Help them achieve competence by encouraging them to be independent and offer diverse opportunities to be challenged and to be successful.</li></ul>

Unconditional Positive Regard For Teachers

“I’m not perfect… but I’m enough.”﻿

“In my early professional years I was asking the question: How can I treat, cure, or change this person? Now I would rephrase the question in this way: How can I provide a relationship which this person may use for his own personal growth?”

We know that it is not perfection we should seek.. spread acceptance, understanding and love 🙌

We take a look at the psychology of unconditional positive regard in counseling, social work, and parenting, with helpful activities.

motivationandinspiration

Motivation & Inspiration

mentalhealth

Mental Health

What is Unconditional Positive Regard in Psychology?

I was extra pleased to have swerved the modern curse that is Wordle when I read that ‘sensitive’ words have been removed from it. A spokesman proclaimed: ‘In an effort to make the puzzle more accessible, we are reviewing the solutions and removing obscure or potentially insensitive words over time. HARRY is an example of an obscure word.’ Other more obviously ‘insensitive’ words had already been removed, such as ‘sluts,’ ‘bitch’ and ‘whore’, and though I’m the most rad of femmes, I do wish they’d stayed. Removing ribaldry makes the language increasingly bland.

Wordle: Sensitive Words

‘Sensitivity’ is one of those words that’s changed its meaning. It was once used mostly to refer to sore teeth and gums. But just as ‘community’ now means people complaining and ‘activist’ now means sitting at home swearing on the internet, to be sensitive simply signifies you’re politically progressive.In 2015, in this magazine, I invented the term cry-bully to describe a new type: ‘A hideous hybrid of victim and victor, weeper and walloper.’ Cry-bullies are everywhere, the duplicitous Pushmi-Pullyus of the personal and the political. And for a cry-bully, almost everything’s too insensitive.

Sensitivity

They’re ‘empaths’, they say, deeply disturbed by anything unpleasant.If it was just Gen Z being soppy, you could slightly excuse it. But when middle-aged men and women who you respected for their apparent insouciance claim to be ‘empaths’, it’s hard not to despair. Witness John Lydon saying that punk was about ‘empathy’. Really? From where I was standing – right at the front of the crowd at the Screen on the Green – it was about anger and spite. But no doubt I got the wrong end of the stick.

Empaths

The Sex Pistols took issue with everyone, from girls who had abortions (‘Bodies’) to the Queen (not a human being, apparently). If this is empathy, then surely it’s only a matter of time before the surviving members of the Clash pop up and tell us that the line from their song ‘Hate and War’ – ‘I hate Englishmen, they’re just as bad as wops!’ – was a profoundly empathetic cry for international brotherhood.

International Brotherhood

I know that narcissists are public enemy number one these days, but if I had to live in a world solely composed of narcissists or empaths, I’d choose the former for the simple reason that it would be more fun. Under the influence of the sensitivity police, Coronation Street, once a haven of wisecracking broads and brawling sex-bombs, has become one long therapy session wherein the formerly feisty female characters inhabit ceaseless hamster wheels of being ‘in bits’, ‘destroyed’ and ‘broken’.

Coronation Street

I know that we’ve come out of a two-year pandemic with untold economic woes just around the corner, but it surely can’t be only me who wakes up each morning excited about facing yet another day in this beautiful world? And even if a lot of us are mis, shouldn’t entertainment elevate rather than lower our mood?If television is getting you down, why not escape into a good book? Better make it an old one though. Ever since publishers started to employ sensitivity readers, modern books have been free from old-fashioned escapist fun.

Escapist fun

As Zoe Dubno has written in The Spectator: ‘For critics, these individuals [sensitivity readers] are the latest stage of the culture wars: woke-ifying new books before readers even have the chance to read them. For publishers they offer a seductively cheap way of reducing the risk of a book or its author being cancelled and the ensuing reputational and profit damage to the firm… Often it seems less like a check on upsetting and harmful language than a safeguard against white, middle-class authors and publishers needing to change their social circles, ideologies or publishing staff in any way.’

Zoe Dubno

Young Adult novels are especially sensitive to sensitivity; my 2004 teenage novel Sugar Rush probably wouldn’t be allowed today, as one of the young lesbians would need to be trans and I wouldn’t, as a white woman, be allowed to write a mixed-race heroine. (Oddly, the demographic which is most ‘sensitive’ about fictional violence is the same one which favours as a leisure pursuit what I call ‘Netflix and kill’: the true-crime genre – deaths of real people rendered down into entertainment.)

Sensitive to Sensitivity

Where once we could laugh at the overly sensitive for being wimps, now the wimps have got together and agreed they they’re simply special, some higher order of being, able to look down on the plebs who can take the hard knocks life routinely hands out and prance merrily on, without recourse to the law or the shrink. ‘Highly Sensitive People’ (HSPs) are the latest belles of the Mental Elf Ball, with Nicole Kidman, Alanis Morissette and Kanye West claiming membership. That last one should be a dead giveaway. I wouldn’t want to be part of any club Kanye West belonged to.

Highly Sensitive People

The elevation of sensitivity over all other human emotions makes for a bland culture; spite is the Tabasco in the Bloody Mary of life, and it often does the recipient good. Once we were allowed to be cruel to be kind if the situation called for it: yes, your bum does look big in that; no, you shouldn’t waste your time trying to be a writer.

A Bland Culture

Now, if we are not kind to an extreme degree, we will be demonised. I understand that some people are tender, but that doesn’t mean the tough should have to mute themselves. The next time a joke offends, maybe try replying in kind rather than violently? Quipping well is the best revenge. <a href="https://www.spectator.co.uk/article/the-cult-of-sensitivity">The Spectator - written by Julie Burchill</a>

Quipping Well

I was extra pleased to have swerved the modern curse that is Wordle when I read that ‘sensitive’ words have been removed from it. A spokesman proclaimed: ‘In an effort to make the puzzle more accessible, we are reviewing the solutions and removing obscure or potentially insensitive words over time. ...

problemsolving

Problem Solving

The cult of sensitivity | The Spectator

<ul><li>First, it means nothing from our past can come back and embarrass us.</li><li>Second, it makes it harder for advertising companies to keep track of what we're up to online.</li><li>And third (in the case of files and emails at least), it frees up space for new stuff.</li></ul>

Why clean it up?

Deleting older messages frees up storage space and makes future searches faster too.In the case of Gmail, there's no automatic way to wipe old emails, so you'll need to remind yourself to do it regularly. The search term you need to put in the box at the top of the web interface is "older_than:" followed by your time period. Use "older_than:1y" to find emails older than a year, for instance, or "older_than:6m" to find emails older than 6 months.With the search results on screen, you can select all the matching messages (use the check box to the top left) and erase them.

Emails

Twitter is the social network that you're probably most interested in when it comes to expunging older messages, and it's also the one that offers the most tools for the job. If you want to keep a copy of your messages on your computer before you wipe them from the web, you can download your archive by opening <a href="https://twitter.com/settings/account">Twitter Settings</a> on the web and choosing Your account and Download an archive of your data.Two of the best auto-delete tools we've come across are <a href="https://tweetdelete.net/">TweetDelete</a> and <a href="https://tweetdeleter.com/">Tweet Deleter</a>,  Jumbo for <a href="https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.jumboprivacy">Android</a> & <a href="https://apps.apple.com/us/app/jumbo-privacy-security/id1454039975">iOS</a>, which can delete old posts on both Twitter & Facebook once they reach a certain age

Social Media

Deleting older files you have stored in the cloud is less about protecting you from the prying eyes of others and more about keeping yourself organized (and limiting the amount of money you spend on cloud storage every month).In the case of <a href="https://www.dropbox.com/">Dropbox</a> on the web, you can quickly view and remove the oldest ones by sorting them by their modified date (use the tick boxes on the left to select files, then click the three dots and Delete to wipe them).For <a href="https://drive.google.com/">Google Drive</a> on the web, look for the Last modified column heading. Use Ctrl+Click to select multiple files then the trash can icon to delete them

Files

There are plenty of reasons to declutter your online traces. Here’s how to tidy up.

timemanagement

Time Management

How to Clean Up Your Digital History

I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.Most people had not honoured even half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.


1. Courage to live your life 

2.  wish I hadn't worked so hard. They missed their children's youth and their partner's companionship spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

2. I wish I hadn't worked so hard.

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming.

3. I had courage to express my feelings.

Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved.

4. I wished to stay in touch with my friends.

The so-called 'comfort' of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content, when deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again."

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

Revised edition of the best-selling memoir that has been read by over a million people worldwide with translations in 29 languages. After too many years of unfulfilling work, Bronnie Ware began searching for a job with heart. Despite having no formal qualifications or previous experience in the field, she found herself working in palliative care. During the time she spent tending to those who were dying, Bronnie's life was transformed. Later, she wrote an Internet blog post, outlining the most common regrets that the people she had cared for had expressed. The post gained so much momentum that it was viewed by more than three million readers worldwide in its first year. At the request of many, Bronnie subsequently wrote a book, The Top Five Regrets of the Dying, to share her story. Bronnie has had a colourful and diverse life. By applying the lessons of those nearing their death to her own life, she developed an understanding that it is possible for everyone, if we make the right choices, to die with peace of mind. In this revised edition of the best-selling memoir that has been read by over a million people worldwide, with translations in 29 languages, Bronnie expresses how significant these regrets are and how we can positively address these issues while we still have the time. The Top Five Regrets of the Dying gives hope for a better world. It is a courageous, life-changing book that will leave you feeling more compassionate and inspired to live the life you are truly here to live.

Revised edition of the best-selling memoir that has been read by over a million people worldwide with translations in 29 languages. After too many years of unfulfilling work, Bronnie Ware began searching for a job with heart. Despite having no formal qualifications or previous experience in the field, she found herself working in palliative care. During the time she spent tending to those who were dying, Bronnie's life was transformed. Later, she wrote an Internet blog post, outlining the most common regrets that the people she had cared for had expressed. The post gained so much momentum that it was viewed by more than three million readers worldwide in its first year. At the request of many, Bronnie subsequently wrote a book, The Top Five Regrets of the Dying, to share her story. Bronnie has had a colourful and diverse life. By applying the lessons of those nearing their death to her own life, she developed an understanding that it is possible for everyone, if we make the right choices, to die with peace of mind. In this revised edition of the best-selling memoir that has been read by over a million people worldwide, with translations in 29 languages, Bronnie expresses how significant these regrets are and how we can positively address these issues while we still have the time. The Top Five Regrets of the Dying gives hope for a better world. It is a courageous, life-changing book that will leave you feeling more compassionate and inspired to live the life you are truly here to live.

Bronnie Ware

Top Five Regrets of the Dying

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