How to Deal with Feeling Bad About Your Feelings - Deepstash

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How to Deal with Feeling Bad About Your Feelings

https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/how_to_deal_with_feeling_bad_about_your_feelings

greatergood.berkeley.edu

How to Deal with Feeling Bad About Your Feelings
For a moment he felt good about this. A moment or two later he felt bad about feeling good about it. Then he felt good about feeling bad about feeling good about it and, satisfied, drove on into the night.

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Meta-emotions are feelings about feelings

Meta-emotions are feelings about feelings
A meta-emotion is an emotion that occurred in response to another emotion: Perhaps you teared up while watching a sappy movie with friends, then felt embarrassed about feeling sad. Or perhaps when you were a child, you felt happy your sibling was reprimanded, then felt guilty about feeling happy. 

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Negative-negative meta-emotions

Negative-negative meta-emotions

... are the most common type. This indicates that many people get upset, nervous, or angry about their own negative emotions, in particular.

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Dealing with meta-emotions

Dealing with meta-emotions
  • It's important to know which emotions you are feeling before you can start to change your reactions to those emotions. 
  • It also helps to appreciate your negative emotions and the work they do for you.

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Negative emotions are important

Negative emotions are important
They are signals that alert you when something is not right in your environment. They can also serve as signals to others that you need help or support.

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4 Types of Meta-emotions:

 4 Types of Meta-emotions:
  • negative-negative (e.g., feeling embarrassed about feeling sad)
  • negative-positive (e.g., feeling guilty about feeling happy)
  • positive-positive (e.g., feeling hopeful about feeling relieved)
  • positive-negative (e.g., feeling pleased about feeling angry). 

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SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:

Emotional Clarity And Depression

Studies have found that just having negative feelings isn’t enough to lead to depressive symptoms. You also have to be unable to put a name to your feeling state, and then dwell on trying to ide...

Emotional Regulation

 Is your ability to modulate or control the type of emotion you’re feeling, how long you feel that emotion, how strong it is, and whether you can turn it from negative to positive. Good emotional regulation, lets you get over negative feelings relatively quickly.

Having bad emotional clarity is thought to lead to low emotional regulation, which is linked to depression and rumination.

Emotional Clarity

Involves your ability to identify what you feel with ease. It affects mental health by predisposing people to depression.

This is a “subjective” ability. There is no external objective reference point for naming your emotions. Emotions are also relative qualities, meaning different people have different definitions and experiences for a given emotion. 

Change and the unchangeable

We like to think that things can be changed. That we are in control somehow.  That's why “never” hurts, because never means that it can’t be changed. “Never” means it’s over. It’s gone. And ...

Meaning and relationships

  • We generate meaning through relationships. And meaning is the fuel of our minds. 
  • Our relationships also define our understanding of ourselves. And when one of these relationships is destroyed, that part of our identity is destroyed along with it. 

Depression vs. sadness

  • Sadness occurs when something feels bad. 
  • Depression occurs when something feels meaningless. 

When something feels bad, at least it has meaning. In depression, everything becomes a big blank void. 

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Mindfulness

... is a collection of practices aimed at helping us to cultivate moment-to-moment awareness of ourselves and our environment.

Meditation sharpens your attention

Meditation helps to counter our tendency to stop paying attention to new information in our environment. Other studies have found that mindfulness meditation can reduce mind-wandering and improve attention.

Larger randomized controlled trials are still needed to understand how meditation might work with other treatments to help people manage attention-deficit disorders.

Consistent meditation

Long-term, consistent meditation mindfulness changes our ability to handle stress in a better, more sustainable way.

  • Practicing meditation reduces the inflammatory response in people exposed to psychological stressors.
  • Mindfulness practices help us to be less reactive to stressors and to recover better from stress when we experience it.