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It transfers ideas from one mind to another and removes all obstacles from the way. Such a conversation feels as relaxing as a Sunday afternoon in your pajamas.
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"Conversational competence is the single most overlooked skill we fail to teach. Kids spend hours each day engaging with ideas and each other through screens, but rarely do they have an opportunity to hone their interpersonal communications skills…… Is there any 21st-century skill more important than being able to sustain coherent, confident conversation?"
Educator Paul Barnwell
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You don’t have to feel your counterpart’s emotions to understand them better. You can label them. It means validating and acknowledging them.
The most effective labels of emotions start with phrases like:
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It means describing the world the way your counterpart sees it in your words.
An accurate summary makes your counterpart say “that’s right” instead of “you’re right.” “That’s right” means your counterpart feels heard AND understood.
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Constructive conversations are held on mutual ground, where the speaker uses analogies relevant to the listener to explain how things work from a broader perspective.
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We tend to trust people whose emotions are authentic, whose actions are in sync with their words.
Genuineness comes when you care about your counterpart and want the outcome to benefit everyone involved.
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SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:
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It’s hard not to get worked up emotionally when you’re in a tense conversation: a disagreement can feel like a threat.
But if your body goes into “fight or flight” mode, ...
When you start noticing yourself getting tense, try to focus on breathing (on feeling the air coming in and out of your lungs).
This will take your attention off the physical signs of panic and keep you centered.
Sitting still when you’re having a difficult conversation can make the emotions build up rather than dissipate.
Standing up and walking around helps to activate the thinking part of your brain.
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This way, you'll be able to hear your team’s true thoughts, which you can to use to inform the opinion you yourself deliver at the end of the conversation.
As a leader, if you speak f...
A key part of being a good listener is showing the speaker that he or she has your undivided attention. Close your laptop and put away your phone.
This gives those speakers the confidence to express themselves fully without feeling that they’re imposing on your time.
7 percent of a message is conveyed through words. Body language plays a major role in how we communicate and how we listen.
When you’re listening, then, be aware of what your body language is saying to the speaker. Unfold your arms and be open to what this person has to say.