<ul><li class="ql-align-justify">Criticism is futile because it puts a person into defensive & usually makes him strive to justify himself</li><li class="ql-align-justify">B.F.SKINNER - psychologist , proved through his experiment that animal rewarded for good behavior will learn much rapidly & retain what learned than animal punished for bad behavior.. same applies to humans too</li><li class="ql-align-justify">Any fool can criticize ,condemn, complain - most fools do. But it take character and self-control to be understanding & forgiving.</li><li class="ql-align-justify">" A great man shows his greatness , by the way he treats little men "</li></ul>

" If u want to gather honey, Don't kick over the beehive"

The lessons I learned from the dark days at Alibaba are that you’ve got to make your team have value, innovation, and vision. Also, if you don’t give up, you still have a chance. And, when you are small, you have to be very focused and rely on your brain,not your strength – Don’t complain, look for opportunities ...

Jack Ma

From magazine Hoover was famous performer at air shows, when he was flying at 300ft, both the engine suddenly stopped. He managed to land.He suspected about the airplane fuel , the ww2 propeller plane fueled with jet fuel instead of gasoline.The young man was sick with agony of his mistake. Tears streamed down his face as bob approached

AirPlane Which Stops @ 300FT 

You can imagine Hoover's anger. But Hoover didn't scold the mechanic, he didn't even criticize him. Instead, he put his big arm around the man's shoulder and said,“To show you I'm sure that you'll never do this again, I want you to service my F-51 tomorrow.”

All this lesson and quotes are from      CHAPTER 1 of the book..

In the present book, How to Win Friends and Influence People, Dale Carnegie says, “You can make someone want to do what you want them to do by seeing the situation from the other person’s point of view and arousing in the other person an eager want.” You learn how to make people like you, win people over to your way of thinking, and change people without causing offense or arousing resentment. For instance, “let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers” and “talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.” This book is all about building relationships. With good relationships, personal and business successes are easy and swift to achieve. Twelve Ways to Win People to Your Way of Thinking 1. The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it. 2. Show respect for the other person's opinions. Never say "You're wrong." 3. If you're wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically. 4. Begin in a friendly way. 5. Start with questions to which the other person will answer yes. 6. Let the other person do a great deal of the talking. 7. Let the other person feel the idea is his or hers. 8. Try honestly to see things from the other person's point of view. 9. Be sympathetic with the other person's ideas and desires. 10. Appeal to the nobler motives. 11. Dramatize your ideas. 12.Throw down a challenge.

Understand yourself and those around you.

psychology

Psychology

personaldevelopment

Personal Development

marketingandsales

Marketing & Sales

communication

Communication

How to Win Friends and Influence People

What basic principles of Adlerian-Psychology should be accepted by every Adlerian? Before we can answer this question we have to clarify: what is Adlerian Psychology? It is a science developed by Adler which attempts to understand and explain human behavior. Not all psychologists try to do this. As a student of psychology, on might be interested in testing or measuring, in animal experimentation in perfecting description of psychoses for the purpose of diagnosing mental illness. All of these approaches will not make you an Adlerian or exclude you from being one.

Adlerian Psychology  

Adlerian Psychology is interpretative; it is an endeavor to understand human behavior. There are other psychologies which, like that of Adler, are dynamic, depth psychologies. Principal among these ar the systems of Freud and Jung. However, Adler has developed his science in a direction essentially different from that of Freud and Jung Some of his principles are not exclusive to his psychology nor are they original with Adler. Similar ideas, in some instances, have been expressed either in philosophy centuries ago or even in psychology shortly before the publication of his chief works

It is rather the totality of Adler's principles, woven together into a workable system, which give a key to the understanding of human behavior and the possibility of altering it. This is his great contribution, and it is the acceptance of this system in totality which makes an Adlerian.In all fields where human behavior, either individually or in group is studied, as in psychology, anthropology, sociology, criminology psychiatry, or where efforts are made to alter behavior, as in education or psychotherapy, his system is applicable.

All principles of his system are interdependent; therefore, the following enumeration of such principles in numerical order is by necessity artificial.

1.  Life is directed movement. The moving force is the desire for survival, the goal is security. Life may be interpreted as a movement to compensate for inferiority feelings, as if one wanted to reach a point above from below, where one would be freed from all inferiority feelings.

2. The goal of security determines all our actions, but the concept of security differs in all individuals. This concept of security, or success, is formed in the early years of childhood, about the first five year of age, in accordance with the early experiences in the limited environment of the child.

It is then that the child forms his life plan or life pattern, which is a plan - his own unique creation - for getting along in such a world as he sees and has come to know. He sets his goal, which is his concept of security; he devises methods, choosing some and discarding others. It short, he develops his life style, which is his way of relating himself to life

His goal of security naturally can never be reached; it is not know to him consciously and could not be expressed by him verbally. This goal determines all expressions of his personality, his actions, feelings words, dreams, what he forgets, and what he remembers.

3.  All behavior is purposeful; we are not driven by a cause, but drawn by our goal, which, however, we were free to set in our childhood. Once the goal is set we are determined by it in all our action' as if "caught in an iron shirt."

4.  Adler calls his psychology "Individual Psychology," according to the Latin individere, "do not divide." The organism-as-a-whole acts and reacts always in totality, never only through one of its parts.

5. An individual's behavior can only be understood in relation to society. Here, his specific unique concept of security causes him to develop either cooperative or other methods in his effort to achieve success, based on his fictitious "private logic." Adler found that early recollections and dreams have a specific meaning to the individual and fit into his purposeful pattern of behavior.

6. Adler came to his discoveries from the observation of "abnormal behavior." Thus he found a new approach to psychopathology. Abnormal behavior, criminal actions, problem children, prostitution, sexual pathology, can be understood by the application of the above mentioned general principles.

7. Furthermore, an Adlerian also believes in the possibility of altering behavior; this alteration can be achieved by scientfic methods developed by Adler. An Alderian applies specific methods of education or psychotherapy in his respective field as teacher, parent, physician etc., based on a framework of general principles. They are essentially an attempt to recognize the goal of the individual, his life plan, the methods he uses to relate himself to life, and to give this knowledge to him. This understanding provides "insight.

It is an essentially Adlerian approach to encourage in order to change the patient's misconceptions of life which he formed in his early childhood. This enables him to give up his efforts to secure himself according to his private concepts and to accept a cooperative goal. Then he can learn to use cooperative methods. Adlerian therapy helps him develop his social feeling which we all have at birth but which, according to Adler, has to be developed.

8. An Adlerian is one who accepts Adler's principles of psychology of psychopathology, and uses his methods, applying his science in all fields of life for the welfare of the people.

Read 'Adlerian Psychology: 8 Basic Principles' By Nita Arnold in full for free.

health

Health

problemsolving

Problem Solving

Adlerian Psychology: 8 Basic Principles

The original MSS, published in 2006 by Cara Nicol, was a 56-item questionnaire designed to measure varying degrees of "self-determined solitude" (SDS) and "not self-determined solitude" (NSDS) on a four-point scale.The prompt question for MSS survey takers: "When I spend time alone, I do so because…” For their most recent (2019) survey, Thomas and Azmitia used a truncated version that consisted of a 14-item questionnaire.

The Motivation for Solitude Scale (MSS)

<ol><li>It sparks my creativity. </li><li>I enjoy the quiet.</li><li>Being alone helps me get in touch with my spirituality. </li><li>It helps me stay in touch with my feelings.</li><li>I value the privacy.</li><li>I can engage in activities that really interest me.</li><li>It helps me gain insight into why I do the things I do.</li><li>I feel energized when I spend time by myself.</li><li>I feel anxious when I'm with others.</li><li>I don't feel liked when I'm with others.</li><li>I can't be myself around others.</li><li>I regret things I say or do when I'm with others.</li><li>I feel uncomfortable when I'm with others.</li><li>I feel like I don't belong when I'm with others.</li></ol>

“When I Spend Time Alone, I Do So Because..." - 14 Reasons Why

<ol><li>It sparks my creativity. </li><li>I enjoy the quiet.</li><li>Being alone helps me get in touch with my spirituality. </li><li>It helps me stay in touch with my feelings.</li><li>I value the privacy.</li><li>I can engage in activities that really interest me.</li><li>It helps me gain insight into why I do the things I do.</li><li>I feel energized when I spend time by myself.</li></ol>

The 8 Self-Determined Reasons Why

<ol><li>I feel anxious when I'm with others.</li><li>I don't feel liked when I'm with others.</li><li>I can't be myself around others.</li><li>I regret things I say or do when I'm with others.</li><li>I feel uncomfortable when I'm with others.</li><li>I feel like I don't belong when I'm with others.</li></ol>

The 6 Not Self-Determined Reasons Why

The researchers found that people who choose to spend time alone for mostly positive, "self-determined" reasons are at a much lower risk of viewing solitude as “social isolation” or suffering the negative consequences associated with feelings of loneliness than those who seek alone time for the predominately "not self-determined" reasons reflected in questions 9-14 in the survey above.

The Survey’s Main Takeaway

When it comes to motivations for seeking solitude, the key factors in the equation are choice and an individual's positive or negative motivation for wanting to be alone. Those who choose to be "let alone" probably know what’s best for their psychological, creative, and spiritual well-being. Conversely, those who have negative motivations for seeking solitude (e.g., social anxiety) often find themselves isolated in ways that are linked to loneliness, dysphoria, or depression.

There Can Be Choice And Motivation In Solitude

Depending on someone’s reasons for wanting to be alone, the Motivation for Solitude Scale (MSS) shows that alone time can have countless potential upsides. Seeking solitude is not necessarily a red flag that something is wrong. According to the researchers, choosing solitude can help people flourish by facilitating self-acceptance, personal growth, creative expression, and spiritual connectedness.

There Is Solitude Sought And Solitude Forced

Virginia Thomas, currently an assistant professor of psychology, conducted this research when she was a graduate student. "We got clear results that are pretty reliable indicators of adaptive versus maladaptive solitude," she said in a statement. "These results increase our awareness that being alone can be restorative and a positive thing. The question is how to be alone without feeling like we're missing out. For many people, solitude is like exercising a muscle they've never used. You have to develop it, flex it, and learn to use time alone to your benefit."

For Many, Solitude Is A Muscle That Has Never Been Used

"Solitude serves the same positive functions in introverts and extroverts. Introverts just need more of it," Thomas said. "Our culture is pretty biased toward exyroversion. When we see any sign of shyness or introversion in children, we worry they won't be popular. But we overlook plenty of well-adjusted teens and young adults who are perfectly happy when alone, and who benefit from their solitude." The researchers encourage parents to appreciate the often undervalued potential benefits of alone time for their children.

Do Introverts and Extroverts Respond Differently to Solitude? 

"Solitude has gotten a lot of bad press, especially for adolescents who get labeled as social misfits or lonely," senior author Margarita Azmitia, professor of psychology at the University of California, Santa Cruz, said in a statement. "There's a stigma for kids who spend time alone. They're considered lacking in social skills, or they get labeled 'loners.’ It's beneficial to know when you need to be alone and when you need to be with others. This study quantifies the benefits of solitude and distinguishes it from the costs of loneliness or isolation."

What About Adolescents And Solitude?

Recently published research (Uziel & Schmidt-Barad, 2022) highlights how being able to choose when we spend time with others or spend time alone increases happiness. On the flip side, being forced to socialize or not being able to choose "self-determined solitude" makes people unhappy.

Forced Company Really Does Make Us Unhappy

During the 10-day study that mimicked real-life social dynamics, participants were exposed to 4 different settings: 1) choosing to be alone, 2) choosing to be with others, 3) forced (no choice) time with others, and 4) forced (no choice) alone time. Notably, the researchers found that being with others by choice had the strongest, most positive effect on feelings of happiness and episodic subjective well-being (ESWB). However, on the opposite end of the spectrum, being with others not by one's choice had the most significant negative impact on ESWB.

The “Choice Matters More with Others” Study

Although this study didn't look at the impact of mandated Covid-19 lockdowns, one could speculate that the loss of choice made it harder for even the most gregarious and extraverted among us to enjoy being surrounded by housemates or family members 24/7. Stay-at-home orders also took away the "self-determined" aspects of SDS. Forced social isolation can quickly start to feel closer to solitary confinement when being alone isn't within your locus of control.

Covid-19 And The Loss Of Choice

"In terms of our momentary experiences, sensing that we are in the company of others by choice is associated with the greatest boost to our well-being, sense of meaning, and control," Liad Uziel and Tomer Schmidt-Barad write in their paper's abstract."Aloneness (by choice and not) emerged as a setting of relative stability, with participants experiencing their different alone conditions quite similarly," they add. According to the authors, solitude is a predictable experience that can be a "source of personal growth" that boosts happiness and well-being if alone time is utilized effectively.

Togetherness And Aloneness: To Each His Own

“I never said, ‘I want to be alone.’ I only said, ‘I want to be let alone!’ There is all the difference.”

Being with others only makes us happy if we do it by choice; when choice is taken away, whether we are social butterflies or lone-wolfs, extraverts or introverts, matters little to our happiness; togetherness and aloneness can make us equally unhappy. Let’s choose what we need to be happy.

A new 14-item questionnaire gauges various motivations for seeking solitude.

motivationandinspiration

Motivation & Inspiration

mentalhealth

Mental Health

loveandrelationships

Love & Relationships

Why Loners Love Being Alone & Why Being Forced to Socialize Makes Many of Us Unhappy

Tracking may be the origins of the scientific method, it was the beginning of deductive reasoning – the art form of applying meaningThe principles of tracking should also be applied to your life – constantly look for and acknowledge information that attunes you with your inner self.The successful art form of tracking naturally creates safety, excellent trackers can convey presence through non-verbal communication with the animals, and vice versa

Tracking & The Meaning of Life

“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate

Whenever you see a leopard, the leopard is allowing you to see it

Where your attention goes, your life goes. When you put your attention on living things, there’s more aliveness in your life.Spending time in a single spot in nature becomes deeply personal. You become attuned and orientated with the patterns and interlocking intelligence within natureTrue fear is a rare experience in modern lifeBoyd details a treacherous storm he had to embrace and was overwhelmed with humility and an understanding of the fragility of life.

Lessons from 40 Days in a Tree

The more time you spend in nature, the more you realize how little we know

Ubuntu – the universal bond shared across humanity, translated as “I am because we are”The western world often is misguided in its search for meaning, associating meaning by comparison. If you grow up in Africa or in nature, you associate meaning through relation. You learn about yourself through your encounters with the world.Sometimes you have to let go of your rational consciousness and let nature take you to a place you can’t go on your ownBoyd describes an encounter with a leopard where he felt this overwhelming sense of connection

Ubuntu Philosophy

A person who is dealing with trauma has a reduction of options. You’re frozen – traumatized people often resort to retreating and isolatingCeremony spaces are healing opportunities: AA, sweat lodges, shared plant medicine experiences. Helps you understand and openly share your traumas.These experiences can alter your personal narrative, viewing the trauma from a new perspective.Boyd struggled with immense trauma from a crocodile attack, he describes a sweat lodge experience where he passed out and thought he was dying but the guide assured him: you’re not dying brother, you’re just being born

Trauma & Healing

Boyd Varty — The Lion Tracker's Guide to Life | Brought to you by Wealthfront automated investing, Athletic Greens all-in-one nutritional supplement, and Helix Sleep premium mattresses. More on all three below.Boyd Varty (@boydvarty) is the author of two books, The Lion Tracker's Guide to Life and his memoir, Cathedral of the Wild. He has been featured in The New York Times, on NBC, and in other media and has taught his philosophy of “tracking your life” to individuals and companies around the world.Boyd is a wildlife and literacy activist who has spent the last ten years refining the art of using wilderness as a place for deep introspection and personal transformation. He grew up in South Africa on Londolozi Game Reserve, a former hunting ground that was transformed into a nature preserve by Boyd’s father and uncle—both visionaries of the restoration movement. Under his family’s stewardship, the Reserve became renowned not only as a sanctuary for animals but as a place where once-ravaged land was able to flourish again and where the human spirit could be restored. When Nelson Mandela was released after 27 years of imprisonment, he went to Londolozi to recover.Boyd has a degree in psychology from the University of South Africa. He is a TED speaker and the host of the Track Your Life podcast. This episode is brought to you by Wealthfront! Wealthfront pioneered the automated investing movement, sometimes referred to as ‘robo-advising,’ and they currently oversee $20 billion of assets for their clients. It takes about three minutes to sign up, and then Wealthfront will build you a globally diversified portfolio of ETFs based on your risk appetite and manage it for you at an incredibly low cost. Smart investing should not feel like a rollercoaster ride. Let the professionals do the work for you. Go to Wealthfront.com/Tim and open a Wealthfront account today, and you’ll get your first $5,000 managed for free, for life. Wealthfront will automate your investments for the long term. Get started today at Wealthfront.com/Tim.*This episode is also brought to you by Helix Sleep! Helix was selected as the #1 overall mattress of 2020 by GQ magazine, Wired, Apartment Therapy, and many others. With Helix, there’s a specific mattress to meet each and every body’s unique comfort needs. Just take their quiz—only two minutes to complete—that matches your body type and sleep preferences to the perfect mattress for you. They have a 10-year warranty, and you get to try it out for a hundred nights, risk free. They’ll even pick it up from you if you don’t love it. And now, Helix is offering up to 200 dollars off all mattress orders plus two free pillows at HelixSleep.com/Tim.*This episode is also brought to you by Athletic Greens. I get asked all the time, “If you could use only one supplement, what would it be?” My answer is usually AG1 by Athletic Greens, my all-in-one nutritional insurance. I recommended it in The 4-Hour Body in 2010 and did not get paid to do so. I do my best with nutrient-dense meals, of course, but AG further covers my bases with vitamins, minerals, and whole-food-sourced micronutrients that support gut health and the immune system. Right now, Athletic Greens is offering you their Vitamin D Liquid Formula free with your first subscription purchase—a vital nutrient for a strong immune system and strong bones. Visit AthleticGreens.com/Tim to claim this special offer today and receive the free Vitamin D Liquid Formula (and five free travel packs) with your first subscription purchase! That’s up to a one-year supply of Vitamin D as added value when you try their delicious and comprehensive all-in-one daily greens product.*For show notes and past guests, please visit tim.blog/podcast.Sign up for Tim’s email newsletter (“5-Bullet Friday”) at tim.blog/friday.For transcripts of episodes, go to tim.blog/transcripts.Discover Tim’s books: tim.blog/books.Follow Tim:Twitter: twitter.com/tferriss Instagram: instagram.com/timferrissFacebook: facebook.com/timferriss YouTube: youtube.com/timferrissPast guests on The Tim Ferriss Show include Jerry Seinfeld, Hugh Jackman, Dr. Jane Goodall, LeBron James, Kevin Hart, Doris Kearns Goodwin, Jamie Foxx, Matthew McConaughey, Esther Perel, Elizabeth Gilbert, Terry Crews, Sia, Yuval Noah Harari, Malcolm Gladwell, Madeleine Albright, Cheryl Strayed, Jim Collins, Mary Karr, Maria Popova, Sam Harris, Michael Phelps, Bob Iger, Edward Norton, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Neil Strauss, Ken Burns, Maria Sharapova, Marc Andreessen, Neil Gaiman, Neil de Grasse Tyson, Jocko Willink, Daniel Ek, Kelly Slater, Dr. Peter Attia, Seth Godin, Howard Marks, Dr. Brené Brown, Eric Schmidt, Michael Lewis, Joe Gebbia, Michael Pollan, Dr. Jordan Peterson, Vince Vaughn, Brian Koppelman, Ramit Sethi, Dax Shepard, Tony Robbins, Jim Dethmer, Dan Harris, Ray Dalio, Naval Ravikant, Vitalik Buterin, Elizabeth Lesser, Amanda Palmer, Katie Haun, Sir Richard Branson, Chuck Palahniuk, Arianna Huffington, Reid Hoffman, Bill Burr, Whitney Cummings, Rick Rubin, Dr. Vivek Murthy, Darren Aronofsky, Balaji Srinivasan, Sarah Silverman, Dr. Andrew Huberman, Dr. Michio Kaku, and many more.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

podcasts

Podcasts

Brought to you by Wealthfront automated investing, Athletic Greens all-in-one nutritional supplement, and Helix Sleep premium mattresses. More on all three below.Boyd Varty (@boydvarty) is the author of two books, The Lion Tracker's Guide to Life and his memoir, Cathedral of the Wild. He has been featured in The New York Times, on NBC, and in other media and has taught his philosophy of “tracking your life” to individuals and companies around the world.Boyd is a wildlife and literacy activist who has spent the last ten years refining the art of using wilderness as a place for deep introspection and personal transformation. He grew up in South Africa on Londolozi Game Reserve, a former hunting ground that was transformed into a nature preserve by Boyd’s father and uncle—both visionaries of the restoration movement. Under his family’s stewardship, the Reserve became renowned not only as a sanctuary for animals but as a place where once-ravaged land was able to flourish again and where the human spirit could be restored. When Nelson Mandela was released after 27 years of imprisonment, he went to Londolozi to recover.Boyd has a degree in psychology from the University of South Africa. He is a TED speaker and the host of the Track Your Life podcast.This episode is brought to you by Wealthfront! Wealthfront pioneered the automated investing movement, sometimes referred to as ‘robo-advising,’ and they currently oversee $20 billion of assets for their clients. It takes about three minutes to sign up, and then Wealthfront will build you a globally diversified portfolio of ETFs based on your risk appetite and manage it for you at an incredibly low cost. Smart investing should not feel like a rollercoaster ride. Let the professionals do the work for you. Go to Wealthfront.com/Tim and open a Wealthfront account today, and you’ll get your first $5,000 managed for free, for life. Wealthfront will automate your investments for the long term. Get started today at Wealthfront.com/Tim.*This episode is also brought to you by Helix Sleep! Helix was selected as the #1 overall mattress of 2020 by GQ magazine, Wired, Apartment Therapy, and many others. With Helix, there’s a specific mattress to meet each and every body’s unique comfort needs. Just take their quiz—only two minutes to complete—that matches your body type and sleep preferences to the perfect mattress for you. They have a 10-year warranty, and you get to try it out for a hundred nights, risk free. They’ll even pick it up from you if you don’t love it. And now, Helix is offering up to 200 dollars off all mattress orders plus two free pillows at HelixSleep.com/Tim.*This episode is also brought to you by Athletic Greens. I get asked all the time, “If you could use only one supplement, what would it be?” My answer is usually AG1 by Athletic Greens, my all-in-one nutritional insurance. I recommended it in The 4-Hour Body in 2010 and did not get paid to do so. I do my best with nutrient-dense meals, of course, but AG further covers my bases with vitamins, minerals, and whole-food-sourced micronutrients that support gut health and the immune system. Right now, Athletic Greens is offering you their Vitamin D Liquid Formula free with your first subscription purchase—a vital nutrient for a strong immune system and strong bones. Visit AthleticGreens.com/Tim to claim this special offer today and receive the free Vitamin D Liquid Formula (and five free travel packs) with your first subscription purchase! That’s up to a one-year supply of Vitamin D as added value when you try their delicious and comprehensive all-in-one daily greens product.*Setting the scene. [05:44]How the Londolozi Game Reserve came to be, and what happened during Boyd’s childhood that instilled him with a “get on with it” attitude. [08:02]Why did Boyd’s father and uncle insist on keeping the property that would become the Londolozi Game Reserve when, at the time, it was considered useless, overgrazed wasteland? [10:18]Boyd shares what it was like growing up as a regular passenger/survivor of The White Knuckle Charter Company. [12:25]How a man named Ken Tinley and the native Shangaan trackers helped a trio of teenagers transform their expanse of scrub-encroached land into a thriving safari business. [21:03]On the ancient lineage of the Shangaan trackers, and how the local wildlife came to trust the human caretakers of Londolozi. [27:05]Renias Mhlongo is supreme among world-class trackers — and sometimes the importance of the work outweighs the will of his clients. [32:21]Which animals are hardest to track at Londolozi — even if you happen to be Richard Siwela? [37:53]Because nature can be unpredictable, how do people protect themselves in Londolozi? [41:03]“I don’t know where we’re going, but I know exactly how to get there.” —Renias Mhlongo [42:56]How the tracking process has changed for Boyd over the years — from confident child to young adult traumatized by a home invasion and crocodile attack to competent grown-up thanks to people like Dr. Martha Beck and Solly Mhlongo. [45:00]What is Ubuntu? [1:02:50]Boyd talks about that time he lived 40 days and 40 nights up a tree — the questions he was trying to answer for himself by doing so, the primal fear he experienced while waiting out a storm, the pros and cons of extreme solitude, and if he’d do it again. [1:05:15]Stories about bees, the birds who help humans rob them, and the power of the hive algorithm. [1:17:45]The dos and don’ts of interacting with lions in the wild. [1:29:42]On the eerie conversation of death, modern confirmation of ancient myths, and the inexplicable movements of beasts and men. [1:34:16]How did Boyd’s own path toward healing after trauma differ from the way his mother and sister recovered from a trauma they experienced? [1:39:57]What is ceremony work, and how can it help someone deal with trauma? [1:43:32]What Boyd means when he says “an authentic life infused with meaning is a kind of activism.” [1:46:40]How Boyd and I have both been affected by the Work of Byron Katie. [1:52:03]Boyd’s first medicine encounter in an Arizona sweat lodge, and what he took away from the experience. [1:56:31]Feelings. Nothing more than feelings. [2:02:49]Kudus and nightjars and leopards in the fire (oh, my)! What a close encounter with a beautiful predator taught Boyd about Ubuntu. [2:04:14]Examining the therapeutic value of spending time with animals. [2:13:05]Laurens van der Post poetically described the sound of a lion’s roar. And, in a packed presentation hall at a major Silicon Valley company, Boyd did not. [2:17:57]An invitation to visit Londolozi and other parting thoughts. [2:22:10]*For show notes and past guests, please visit tim.blog/podcast.For deals from sponsors of The Tim Ferriss Show, please visit tim.blog/podcast-sponsors.Sign up for Tim’s email newsletter (“5-Bullet Friday”) at tim.blog/friday.For transcripts of episodes, go to tim.blog/transcripts.Discover Tim’s books: tim.blog/books.Follow Tim:Twitter: twitter.com/tferriss Instagram: instagram.com/timferrissFacebook: facebook.com/timferriss YouTube: youtube.com/timferrissPast guests on The Tim Ferriss Show include Jerry Seinfeld, Hugh Jackman, Dr. Jane Goodall, LeBron James, Kevin Hart, Doris Kearns Goodwin, Jamie Foxx, Matthew McConaughey, Esther Perel, Elizabeth Gilbert, Terry Crews, Sia, Yuval Noah Harari, Malcolm Gladwell, Madeleine Albright, Cheryl Strayed, Jim Collins, Mary Karr, Maria Popova, Sam Harris, Michael Phelps, Bob Iger, Edward Norton, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Neil Strauss, Ken Burns, Maria Sharapova, Marc Andreessen, Neil Gaiman, Neil de Grasse Tyson, Jocko Willink, Daniel Ek, Kelly Slater, Dr. Peter Attia, Seth Godin, Howard Marks, Dr. Brené Brown, Eric Schmidt, Michael Lewis, Joe Gebbia, Michael Pollan, Dr. Jordan Peterson, Vince Vaughn, Brian Koppelman, Ramit Sethi, Dax Shepard, Tony Robbins, Jim Dethmer, Dan Harris, Ray Dalio, Naval Ravikant, Vitalik Buterin, Elizabeth Lesser, Amanda Palmer, Katie Haun, Sir Richard Branson, Chuck Palahniuk, Arianna Huffington, Reid Hoffman, Bill Burr, Whitney Cummings, Rick Rubin, Dr. Vivek Murthy, Darren Aronofsky, Balaji Srinivasan, Sarah Silverman, Dr. Andrew Huberman, Dr. Michio Kaku, and many more.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Tim Ferriss is a self-experimenter and bestselling author, best known for The 4-Hour Workweek, which has been translated into 40+ languages.  Newsweek calls him "the world's best human guinea pig," and The New York Times calls him "a cross between Jack Welch and a Buddhist monk."  In this show, he deconstructs world-class performers from eclectic areas (investing, chess, pro sports, etc.), digging deep to find the tools, tactics, and tricks that listeners can use.

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#571: Boyd Varty — The Lion Tracker's Guide to Life

Ethical fading is where people make unethical decisions thinking they're within their ethical framework. They will rationalise why they made their decisions. "I have to put food on the table", "everyone is doing it", "it's the industry standard." For example, a pharmaceutical company that has a patent on an essential drug keeps on raising the price exponentially to meet financial targets. While it is not illegal, it is unethical. It doesn't feel right.

Ethical fading

We use language to distance ourselves from the impact of our decisions. We use and overuse euphemisms such as "companies would never spy on their customers", but we love data mining. The danger increases with the slippery slope. When somebody use unethical behaviour and gets away with it or even rewarded for it, then does it again and bigger than before. Then other people join in and before you realise, you have full unethical fading.

We use language to create distance

Poor leadership reward unethical behaviour by creating conditions where people will do these things. For example, exerting pressure on people, even threatening them that if they miss their numbers they'll lose their job. Yet, good leadership can reverse ethical fading.

Poor leadership can cause ethical fading

How do employees manage to do incredibly unethical things without feeling guilty about it? Ethical fading is so insidious, we don't always realize it's happening. + + + Simon is an unshakable optimist. He believes in a bright future and our ability to build it together. Described as “a visionary thinker with a rare intellect,” Simon has devoted his professional life to help advance a vision of the world that does not yet exist; a world in which the vast majority of people wake up every single morning inspired, feel safe wherever they are and end the day fulfilled by the work that they do. Simon is the author of multiple best-selling books including Start With Why, Leaders Eat Last, Together is Better, and The Infinite Game. + + + Website: http://simonsinek.com/ Live Online Classes: http://simonsinek.com/inspireU Podcast: http://apple.co/simonsinek Instagram: https://instagram.com/simonsinek/ Linkedin: https://linkedin.com/in/simonsinek/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/simonsinek Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/simonsinek Simon’s books: The Infinite Game: https://simonsinek.com/product/the-in... Start With Why: https://simonsinek.com/product/start-... Find Your Why: https://simonsinek.com/product/find-your-why Leaders Eat Last: https://simonsinek.com/product/leader... Together is Better: https://simonsinek.com/product/togeth... + + + #SimonSinek

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How do employees manage to do incredibly unethical things without feeling guilty about it? Ethical fading is so insidious, we don't always realize it's happening.

+ + +

Simon is an unshakable optimist. He believes in a bright future and our ability to build it together. 

Described as “a visionary thinker with a rare intellect,” Simon has devoted his professional life to help advance a vision of the world that does not yet exist; a world in which the vast majority of people wake up every single morning inspired, feel safe wherever they are and end the day fulfilled by the work that they do.

Simon is the author of multiple best-selling books including Start With Why, Leaders Eat Last, Together is Better, and The Infinite Game.

+ + +

Website: http://simonsinek.com/
Live Online Classes: http://simonsinek.com/inspireU
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Find Your Why: https://simonsinek.com/product/find-your-why
Leaders Eat Last: https://simonsinek.com/product/leader...
Together is Better: https://simonsinek.com/product/togeth...

+ + +

#SimonSinek

Simon Sinek is an unshakable optimist. He believes in a bright future and our ability to build it together.

Simon has devoted his life to help advance a vision of the world that does not yet exist; a world in which the vast majority of people wake up every single morning inspired, feel safe wherever they are and return home fulfilled at the end of the day.  Every day is an opportunity to inspire someone. 

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Learn more at simonsinek.com.

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How Unethical Behavior Spreads | Simon Sinek

How Unethical Behavior Spreads

Believe it or not, colours actually play a large role in controlling your energy and inturn, control your everyday productivity.They have the power to have an effect on your physical, emotional and intellectual state of mind.In general, colours can either have a positive or a negative effect on you and your work flow. So it’s important to have the right type of colours in your workspace to release the right kind of energy from that space.

Intro

It’s interesting to note that the influence of colours in our energies is largely based on our own inner nature and the extent to which the colours can affect us is based on some of the most prominent emotions within us. Another interesting fact; it is not only the colours that have an effect on us but also the shade of the colour can have a positive or negative affect on us.

This strong colour wakes up the physical aspect of the workspace and even has physical effects on the people in the workspace.Often known as the ‘stimulating colour’ , red can get your heart beating and your pulse rising.If you’re someone who needs just a little extra push to get you working, this warm colour is the way to exert that pressure on yourself.

Often times, too much red or too much of a flashy tone of red can become overwhelming and might not affect your work environment in the most positive way. Also, having too much red and getting your pulse a little too high might even evoke your inner ‘fight-or-flight’ response and even make you agressive – definitely not good for a work environment.

Keep In Mind

While red plays a large role in physical affects, yellow dives move towards the emotional energy.Just like red, yellow is also very energizing to have in workspaces and is an excellent colour for when you need a little productivity push. A colour that radiates positivity and has a large role in lifting emotional confidence levels and lifting your spirit when you’re down.According to colour psychologist Angela Wright, it is the strongest colour to stimulate creativity and every time you’re stuck with a creative project/idea, yellow is just the colour that can get your creative wheels turning.

Yellow

Although yellow mostly affects your emotional health positively, sometimes too much yellow or the wrong tone can become, well, a little too much and even raise anxiety levels in some people, so try not to overdo it.

When red controls the physical aspect of productivity and yellow controls the emotional aspect, it’s obvious that a mixture of both these colours will affect both of these aspects.Orange stimulates both, the mind and the body and raises you to a more productive level.Considered a ‘fun colour ‘ by colour psychologists, orange symbolises happiness and determination.

Orange

Even though a fun colour, orange can be a little too overwhelming and might even be counterproductive to incorporate too much orange into your workspace. Instead of making it the main theme, pair it up with other colours which compliment each other well or as a slight “pop” in colour. This will create a comfortable energy flow with an element of fun and confidence.

The complete opposite of red, green gives out a sense of calmness and gives out a reassuring energy.As a harmonizing colour , it helps maintain a well kept balance between all the colours and different textures in a workspace. Green works best in a calm working environment or keeping a workspace calm and collected, maintaining balance between everything.If you’re someone who constantly finds yourself overwhelmed by the gazillion tasks at hand, try placing more green to your work area to put yourself in a more calm place.

Green

It’s important to choose the right tone of green to get the best results. A shade too bright might end up clashing with everything and make things more chaotic, while a shade too light might make everything seem bland.

Seen as a soothing colour, blue helps in concentration and keeping your mind calm. Popular for use in office spaces, colour psychologists believe blue can help in clear communication, as it helps stimulate thoughts, and is the choice for completing administrative tasks and projects that require deep focus.

Blue

Certain people might perceive blue as ‘cold ‘ and ‘unemotional ‘. It is adviced to pair it up with colours like orange having a little pop in order to keep things more lively and warm.

Colours do affect your own productivity and can also have an affect on your team's work. It is important to keep in mind the various colours and their effects before setting up a workspace. 

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Product & Design

Play Of Colours In Productivity

Transactional analysis (TA) is a theory informing a type of <a href="https://thehumancondition.com/psychotherapy-introduction-benefits/">psychotherapy</a> that psychologists use to facilitate growth and prosocial change in clients. TA can help people develop better <a href="https://thehumancondition.com/mindful-awareness-health-and-mental-wellness/">self-awareness</a>, communication skills, and improve how they relate to others. Practitioners use ideas from several modalities, including psychodynamic, behavioral, and <a href="https://thehumancondition.com/gestalt-therapy-and-the-path-to-wholeness/">Gestalt theories</a>.

Transactional Analysis (TA): Overview, Examples, and Effectiveness

Transactional analysis (TA) is a valuable resource for people who want to explore their ego states and unconscious life scripts to improve their personal development, self-awareness, and relationship skills.

Transactional Analysis (TA): Overview, Examples, and Effectiveness - The Human Condition

A January 2022 Slack survey of more than 10,000 knowledge workers and their leaders shows that the top concern for executives about hybrid and remote work is “proximity bias.” Namely, 41% feel worried about the negative impact on work culture from the prospect of inequality between office-centric, hybrid and fully remote employees.
The difference in time spent in the office leads to concerns ranging from decreased career mobility for those who spend less facetime with their supervisor to resentment building up against the staff who have the most flexibility in where to work.

Proximity Bias In Remote/Flexible Workers

Surveys show that two-thirds of large employers intend to have a mainly hybrid schedule after the pandemic ends for non-front line employees, with some fully remote and some office-centric.
Employee surveys show that two-thirds to three-quarters of all workers who can work at least some time remotely want a very flexible hybrid or fully remote schedule permanently.

Failure Of Leaders To Adapt To A Flexible Future Of Work: Survey Findings

There’s an important retention issue involved in providing employees with their desired level of flexibility, especially in the context of the Great Resignation. The survey indicates that of those knowledge workers not satisfied with the flexibility at their workplace, 72% are likely to look for a new job in the next year. That’s an especially important issue from the perspective of diversity. While 75% of white knowledge workers want a hybrid or fully remote schedule, 86% of Hispanic/Latinx and 81% of Asian/Asian-American and Black knowledge workers want such flexibility.

The Fickle Nature Of Remote Workers

Why haven’t leaders addressed the obvious problem of proximity bias?
Any reasonable external observer could predict the issues arising from differences in time spent in the office. Unfortunately, leaders often fail to see the clear threat in front of their noses.
You might have heard of <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Black-Swan-Improbable-Robustness-Fragility/dp/081297381X">black swans</a>, the hard-to-predict, low-probability, high-impact threats like the pandemic. Well, the opposite kind of threats are called <a href="https://us.macmillan.com/books/9781250053824">gray rhinos</a>: obvious dangers that we fail to see because of our mental blindspots.

Black Swans And Grey Rhinos

Cognitive biases or mental blindspots are dangerous judgment errors that result in poor strategic and financial decisions. They render leaders unable to resist following their gut instead of relying on best practices. 
One of these biases is called functional fixedness. When we have a certain perception of appropriate practices, we tend to disregard other more appropriate alternatives.

Mental Blindspots: Cognitive Bias

Trying to transpose existing ways of collaboration in “office culture” to remote work is a prime example of functional fixedness. 
That’s why leaders fail to address strategically the problems arising with the shift to a hybrid-centric culture of work. They thought their pre-existing ways of management would be more than enough for the new world. Unfortunately for them, the context changed, and they ended up like fish out of water.

Imposing The Old Way

Another cognitive bias, related to functional fixedness, is called the<a href="https://journals.aom.org/doi/abs/10.5465/amp.2013.0091"> not-invented-here syndrome</a>. It’s a leader’s antipathy towards adopting practices not invented within their organization, no matter how useful. No wonder that leaders fail to look externally for techniques to address proximity-bias related issues. Instead, they try to come up with their own strategies and often work very hard and spend way too many resources to reinvent the wheel. If they’re lucky, it’s round, but too often, it’s a square wheel.

Not Invented Here

Many organizations may need some employees to come in full-time. Others may need to come in on a hybrid schedule even if they worked full-time remotely during the pandemic. 
Addressing these potential cultural divides is vital to prevent a sense of “haves” and “have-nots” from developing, as well as pre-empting career-limiting facetime differences with supervisors. Leaders can address this by focusing on a shared culture of “Excellence From Anywhere”. 
This culture takes into account the nature of an employee's work and promotes task-based policies, allowing remote work whenever possible.

'Excellence From Anywhere' Strategy

The “Excellence From Anywhere” strategy addresses concerns about divides by <a href="https://disasteravoidanceexperts.com/effective-remote-team-management-through-weekly-performance-evaluations/">focusing on deliverables</a>, regardless of where you work. Doing so also involves adopting best practices for hybrid and remote <a href="https://disasteravoidanceexperts.com/effective-virtual-collaboration-for-a-thriving-culture-in-hybrid-and-remote-teams/">collaboration</a> and <a href="https://fortune.com/2021/10/19/hybrid-remote-work-innovation-virtual-brainstorming/">innovation</a>. By valuing deliverables, collaboration and innovation through a focus on the shared work culture of “Excellence From Anywhere,” you can instil in your employees a focus on deliverables. The core idea is to get all of your workforce to pull together to achieve business outcomes; the location doesn’t matter.

Benefits Of 'Excellence From Anywhere'

Addressing the problem of 'Facetime with the Boss' necessitates shifting from the traditional, high-stakes, large-scale quarterly or even annual performance evaluations to much more frequent weekly or biweekly, low-stakes, brief performance evaluation one-on-one check-ins.
Supervisees agree on three to five weekly or biweekly performance goals with their supervisor. Then, 72 hours before their check-in meeting, they send a brief report to their boss under a page of how they did on these goals, what challenges they faced and how they overcame them.

Facetime With Managers

The transition to a hybrid and remote work culture in the post-pandemic recovery leads to the threat of resentment over flexibility and worries over career standing due to facetime with the boss. 
This reframes the conversation to help everyone focus on pulling together to achieve shared business objectives and prioritizing deliverables rather than where and how you work through <a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B095J5NNJW/ref=as_li_qf_asin_il_tl?ie=UTF8&tag=intentinsigh-20&creative=9325&linkCode=as2&creativeASIN=B095J5NNJW&linkId=78ad7c97cef73259f8a7edf8f22ad158">research-based best practices</a>.

The Bottom Line

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Teamwork

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Leadership & Management

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Career

How to Manage a Hybrid Team

Flexibility is the key to success in a post-pandemic work culture. 

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Remote Work

Why Proximity Bias Keeps Leaders From Excelling in the Era of Hybrid and Remote Work

If you're feeling your body contracting or overheating, step away from whatever you're doing and take a deep breath. 
Or if you want to take it a step further, try meditation and mindfulness exercises for beginners.

Breathe

Do something that feels good for your body and helps you get out of your head, whether that's deep cleaning or comfort decorating to create a cozier space, tips on learning a new skill or jump starting your exercise routine.

Get Moving

The kitchen is a safe space for a lot of us. Maybe this is the weekend that you finally re-create Grandpa's famous lasagna, or learn how to make a prettier pie, or maybe just lose yourself in some kitchen organization.

Nourish Yourself

When the news is scary, it's easy to get lost in our own heads. Reach out to loved ones instead. 
That could look like sitting down to write an actual letter to a relative, spending time with neighbors, playing (or creating!) games with family, or even taking the time to write down those generational stories. If your little ones are struggling to go to bed at the end of the day, try talking to them about the heavy news head-on.

Stay Connected

Remember that it's OK not to be plugged into the news. 
By turning off your alerts or checking the headlines once or twice a day, you may be able to feel more grounded and prioritize yourself and loved ones.

Sign Off

News does not stop, increases anxiety and is programmed to be addictive.

The news is overwhelming right now. While we wait for more information, don't forget to care for yourself and loved ones in other ways.

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Mindfulness

5 ways to cope with the stressful news cycle

Can you imagine a pink elephant? Is it big or small? Hot pink or pastel pink Give your pink elephant as much detail as you can. Now that you have got your pink elephant clear in your head, it is time to stop thinking about it. Think about any other topic for 30 seconds, and observe where your thoughts take you.How long did you last without the pink elephant creeping back into your mind? For most of us, that pink elephant will appear back in our thoughts within seconds. The same is true of unwanted and intrusive thoughts: the more you try to suppress them, the more they will bother you. T

The Pink Elephant Paradox

<ul><li>Propagation of persistent negative emotions. Intrusive or unwanted thoughts are associated with depression, anxiety, post-traumatic stress, and obsessive-compulsive disorders. However, individuals who are otherwise healthy can also develop intrusive thoughts that are comparable to a clinical obsession. </li><li>Increased distractibility. The more an individual struggles with intrusive thoughts, the more distractible they tend to be. </li><li>Poor decision-making. Rather than being able to make rational judgments, you may instead be swayed by persistent thoughts that lead you to make the wrong decision.</li></ul>

The Impact of the Pink Elephant Paradox

<ul><li>Becoming more aware and accepting of negative thoughts or feelings can help to reduce the frequency of intrusive thoughts, as well as making them feel less distressing.</li><li>Engage in constructive distractions. When an intrusive thought arises, finding a constructive distraction is healthier than ruminating on it. Find something that requires almost all of your attention, such as reading, chatting to a friend, going for a run, painting or watching a film.</li><li>If you find yourself ruminating on negative thoughts, try to replace them with positive ones.</li></ul>

How to Manage The Pink Elephant Paradox

The more you try to suppress unwanted and intrusive thoughts, the more they will bother you. This is called the Pink Elephant Paradox.

The impact of the Pink Elephant Paradox on our emotions and decisions

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