I recently recovered from burnout. Reflecting on that time, I realise I’ve been stupid. A few of you might have had similar experiences. I was supervising two teams. I was also responsible for the design of software, including challenging stakeholder management. Then I took on an additional role, as Diversity & Inclusion Officer. On top of that, and with top priority, I was working hard on what I care most about: helping our political, and corporate environment become more design and human-centred.

Mental health is too costly to ignore.

I had all these responsibilities in parallel. Not even because of ambition. I’m not driven by status or promotions.I believe in Human Centred Design and was trying to put this on the map. This is really important to me. I did all the other things because I thought that it was the right thing to do for the organization.I was wrong. Obviously.It was just a matter of time before I’d burn out. I’m a sensitive person. That didn’t help. I suppose that the social effect of Covid didn’t help either.I eventually burned out.

Everyone/Me

After some time off, I'm back to work. I caused some debate by posting a personal message about my mental health on our Slack channel.Those who follow me on IG/LinkedIn might have noticed that I have recently become more active. In 2021, I became depressed & started to have occasional suicidal episodes. I’ve tried to deny my feelings and given people the impression that I was ok, but that’s unsustainable.After a long period of hesitation, I reached out to a psychiatrist. He prescribed antidepressants. I’m currently on the lowest dose possible, have 0 side effects, & don't rely on social media.

And then I recovered :)

Mental health is too costly to ignore, for ourselves and our companies

I recently recovered from burnout. Reflecting on that time, I realise I’ve been stupid. A few of you might have had similar experiences. I was supervising two teams. I was also responsible for the…

Understand yourself and those around you.

psychology

Psychology

personaldevelopment

Personal Development

health

Health

mentalhealth

Mental Health

Is Stress Still Taboo At Work? 6 Reasons Why We Should Be Open About It

Modern life seems to encourage acceleration for the sake of acceleration – to what end? Photo from JoeyCheung / Shutterstock.com . In the 1950s, <a href="https://books.google.com/books/about/Take_Back_Your_Time.html?id=_UmpZOlnvU0C&printsec=frontcover&source=kp_read_button#v=onepage&q&f=false">scholars worried that </a>, thanks to technological innovations, Americans wouldn’t know what to do with all of their leisure time.

Yet today, as sociologist Juliet Schor <a href="https://books.google.com/books?id=KjZ54lNDE2EC&dq=overworked+american&hl=en&sa=X&redir_esc=y">notes </a>, Americans are overworked, putting in more hours than at any time since the Depression and more than in any other in Western society. It’s probably not unrelated to the fact that instant and constant access has become de rigueur, and our devices constantly expose us to a barrage of colliding and clamoring messages: “Urgent,” “Breaking News,” “For immediate release,” “Answer needed ASAP.” It disturbs our leisure time, our family time – even our consciousness.

Over the past decade, I’ve tried to understand the social and psychological effects of our growing interactions with new information and communication technologies, a topic I examine in my book “<a href="https://www.routledge.com/The-Terminal-Self-Everyday-Life-in-Hypermodern-Times/Gottschalk/p/book/9781472437082">The Terminal Self: Everyday Life in Hypermodern Times </a>.” In this 24/7, “always on” age, the prospect of doing nothing might sound unrealistic and unreasonable. But it’s never been more important.

In an age of incredible advancements that can enhance our human potential and planetary health, why does daily life seem so overwhelming and anxiety-inducing? Why aren’t things easier? It’s a complex question, but one way to explain this irrational state of affairs is something called the force of acceleration. <a href="https://cup.columbia.edu/book/social-acceleration/9780231148351">According to German critical theorist Hartmut Rosa </a>, accelerated technological developments have driven the acceleration in the pace of change in social institutions.

Acceleration for the Sake of Acceleration

Noticeable acceleration began more than two centuries ago, during the Industrial Revolution. But this acceleration has itself … accelerated. Guided by neither logical objectives nor agreed-upon rationale, propelled by its own momentum, and encountering little resistance, acceleration seems to have begotten more acceleration, for the sake of acceleration. To Rosa, this acceleration <a href="http://www.spiegel.de/international/zeitgeist/hartmut-rosa-essay-acceleration-plagues-modern-society-a-909465.html">eerily mimics </a>the criteria of a totalitarian power: 1) it exerts pressure on the wills and actions of subjects; 2) it is inescapable; 3) it is all-pervasive; and 4) it is hard or almost impossible to criticize and fight.

Unchecked acceleration has consequences.At the environmental level, it extracts resources from nature faster than they can replenish themselves and produces waste faster than it can be processed.At the personal level, it distorts how we experience time and space. It deteriorates how we approach our everyday activities, deforms how we relate to each other and erodes a stable sense of self. It leads to burnout at one end of the continuum and to depression at the other.

The Oppression of Speed

For example, <a href="https://www.bookdepository.com/Gender-Divisions-Working-Time-New-Economy-Diane-Perrons/9781847204974">research finds </a>two to three times more self-reported health problems, from anxiety to sleeping issues, among workers who frequently work in high-speed environments compared with those who do not.When our environment accelerates, we must pedal faster in order to keep up with the pace.

Clearly, acceleration demands more work – and to what end? There are only so many hours in a day, and this additional expenditure of energy reduces individuals’ ability to engage in life’s essential activities: family, leisure, community, citizenship, spiritual yearnings and self-development. It’s a vicious loop: Acceleration imposes more stress on individuals and curtails their ability to manage its effects, thereby worsening it.

In a hypermodern society propelled by the twin engines of acceleration and excess, doing nothing is equated with waste, laziness, lack of ambition, boredom or “down” time. An ad for Microsoft Office stresses the importance of being able to always work. Photo from Microsoft . But this betrays a rather instrumental grasp of human existence.

Doing Nothing and ‘Being’

An ad for Microsoft Office stresses the importance of being able to always work. Photo from Microsoft . But this betrays a rather instrumental grasp of human existence. <a href="https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamainternalmedicine/fullarticle/1809754">Much research </a>– and many spiritual and philosophical systems – suggest that detaching from daily concerns and spending time in simple reflection and contemplation are essential to health, sanity and personal growth.

Similarly, to equate “doing nothing” with nonproductivity betrays a short-sighted understanding of productivity. In fact, psychological <a href="https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=2432964">research suggests </a>that doing nothing is essential for creativity and innovation, and a person’s seeming inactivity might actually cultivate new insights, inventions or melodies.<a href="https://www.harpercollins.com/9780060750510/in-praise-of-slowness">As legends go </a>, Isaac Newton grasped the law of gravity sitting under an apple tree. Archimedes discovered the law of buoyancy relaxing in his bathtub, while Albert Einstein was well-known for staring for hours into space in his office.

Doing nothing – or just being – is as important to human well-being as doing something. The key is to balance the two.

Since it will probably be difficult to go cold turkey from an accelerated pace of existence to doing nothing, one first step consists in decelerating. One relatively easy way to do so is to simply turn off all the technological devices that connect us to the internet – at least for a while – and assess what happens to us when we do.<a href="https://www.liebertpub.com/doi/10.1089/cyber.2016.0259">Danish researchers found </a>that students who disconnected from Facebook for just one week reported notable increases in life satisfaction and positive emotions. <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2010/08/16/technology/16brain.html">In another experiment </a>, neuroscientists who went on a nature trip reported enhanced cognitive performance.

Taking Your Foot Off the Pedal

Different social movements are addressing the problem of acceleration. The Slow Food movement, for example, is a grassroots campaign that advocates a form of deceleration by rejecting fast food and factory farming. As we race along, it seems as though we’re not taking the time to seriously examine the rationale behind our frenetic lives – and mistakenly assume that those who are very busy must be involved in important projects.

The academic sabbatical is centered on the understanding that the mind needs to rest and be allowed to explore in order to germinate new ideas.

American workers’ productivity has increased dramatically since 1973 . What has also increased sharply during that same period is the pay gap between productivity and pay. While productivity between 1973 and 2016 has increased by 73.7 percent, hourly pay has increased by only 12.5 percent. In other words, productivity has increased at about six times the rate of hourly pay.

Workers receive more emails than ever before – a number that’s only expected to grow . The more emails you receive, the more time you need to process them. It requires that you either accomplish this or another task in less time, that you perform several tasks at once, or that you take less time in between reading and responding to emails.

Cognitively, it inhibits sustained focus and critical evaluation. Physiologically, it can stress our bodies and disrupt vital functions.

Touted by the mass media and corporate culture , this credo of busyness contradicts both how most people in our society define “the good life ” and the tenets of many Eastern philosophies that extol the virtue and power of stillness. French philosopher Albert Camus perhaps put it best when he wrote, “Idleness is fatal only to the mediocre.” Simon Gottschalk is Professor of Sociology at the University of Nevada, Las Vegas.

We're always on but not necessarily connected.

Technology has made many aspects of daily life much easier. So why do we still feel so overwhelmed?

habits

Habits

timemanagement

Time Management

In Praise of Doing Nothing

Charisma is a skill that can be learned by anyone! It has nothing to do with how introverted or extraverted you are.Charisma = warmth + competenceIt is essential to have both of these qualities because without warmth people won't like you and without competence people won't take you seriously. They should feel like they can trust and rely on you.

What Is Charisma?

<ul><li>Show your hands, especially the inside of your hands. It will make you more trustworthy and shows that you have nothing to hide.</li><li>On zoom calls, don't sit too close to the camera as you might appear as too upfront. Instead sit at a distance of 1 to 1.5ft away. In person you shouldn't be standing too close to them.</li><li>Lean in and raise your eyebrows when something is interesting.</li><li>Don't end your sentence as a question on a high note. Don't uptalk. You can prevent this by speaking on the out-breath as it will make your voice deeper and hence sound more confident.</li><li>Don't fake smile. People will notice it.</li></ul>

Easy Tips To Enhance Charisma #1

<ul><li>Nod three times. The other person will talk 70% more because nodding is a sign of warmth.</li><li>Tilt your head.</li><li>Add vocalisations such as "uhm, mhm, aha, oh". They also show warmth.</li><li>Use warm words that you want the other person to feel. "I can't wait to collaborate with you" will make the other person more collaborative. "I'd love to hug you right now" will make them feel the warmth of a hug on their skin.</li><li>Completely front the other person. Angle everything towards the person. The toes show in the direction someone wants to go, so they should be pointing to your partner.</li><li>Mirror their behaviour.</li></ul>

Easy Tips To Enhance Charisma #2

On Mel Robbins' podcast, body language expert Vanessa Van Edwards shares a few easy tricks that instantly make you more charismatic.

Ready to level up? 🚀 https://bit.ly/takecontrol2023 👈 Sign up for my FREE 3-part science-backed training, Take Control with Mel Robbins! It’s designed specifically to help you step back into excellence, take ACTION, and create the life you deserve 🌟
—

In this episode, you’re getting a crash course in 13 essential hacks that will help you be more successful, and they’re backed by surprising research out of Princeton.
 
Vanessa Van Edwards is the founder of the behavior lab The Science of People, a behavioral investigator, #bodylanguage expert, and bestselling author who specializes in the kind of science-based people skills most of us never hear about.

Vanessa’s research proves that anyone can learn these practical skills, earn the trust of others around them, and become more #confident, competent, and reliable. 
  
Listen, and you'll learn: 
- 3 things you must do in the first ten seconds of a Zoom call to appear trustworthy and reliable
- How to nail any interview by building unstoppable confidence
- Why do you keep getting passed over for a promotion?
- The words you need to get the bonus or raise you deserve
- Why a second impression is just as important as the first
- How a fake smile will ruin your reputation
- The simple mistake we all make when asking for what we want
- How do you spot a liar?

This is an encore episode that is packed with tools, tips, and scripts to boost your chances of #success. With new and exciting insights from me at the top of the episode, you will leave feeling more confident for your next interview, first date, or wherever you are upleveling in your life. 

You owe it to yourself to learn how to cultivate unstoppable confidence and influence, and you can do that in just a few minutes. 

Xo, Mel 

In this episode:
05:51: The shocking research from Princeton about how people size you up.
07:40: What exactly IS charisma and what does it look like?
08:32: Why high achievers can’t just rely on their intelligence.
09:45: Two types of awkward people and how to tell.
16:22: Are you highly competent? Look for these three signs.
19:12:  What highly competent people are missing.
21:11: What highly warm people are missing.
28:34: A simple test that will help you figure out how charismatic you are
33:08: The ONE thing you need to do during the first 10 seconds of your zoom call
37:43: The reason why you keep getting passed over for that promotion
51:58: Why you should never fake a smile 
54:38: Three ways you can start building your charisma today.
1:09:46: Why a second impression is as important as the first
1:31:35:  Five silent cues to command respect in any situation.

Listen to the podcast episode "Research From Princeton: 13 Proven Hacks That Boost Your Influence & Make You More Confident" - https://link.chtbl.com/DAinFkFf?sid=ep91_description

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Want to keep watching? Catch exclusive EXTENDED cuts for each episode of The Mel Robbins Podcast here on YouTube https://bit.ly/tmrp_playlist 📺

Listen to The Mel Robbins Podcast while you're on-the-go! https://link.chtbl.com/DAinFkFf?sid=listennow 🎧 Available wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts. New episodes drop every Monday (to start your week) and Thursday (to get you through it).
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communication

Communication

loveandrelationships

Love & Relationships

podcasts

Podcasts

NY Times Best Selling Author + Award Winning Podcast Host with 5x #1 best selling audiobooks on Audible.

Mel Robbins

Be Confident: Use Body Language to Boost Your Influence & Income | Mel Robbins Podcast [ENCORE]

Be Confident: Use Body Language to Boost Your Influence & Income | Mel Robbins Podcast

People can be motivated by monetary rewards, mentorship/mentors, potential consequences, ambition, motivational quotes and speeches, or feelings.Albeit, one of the most significant sources of motivation an adult can have, is arguably Peer Influence.

Introduction

Peer pressure and peer influence carry a default negative connotation because of their linkages with drug and substance abuse and other vices among teenagers and adolescents.Peer pressure could be Negative but it can also be positive. The form of its effect lies in the kind of friends you keep and the foundations of the friendship.

The Controversial Nature of Peer Pressure

<ul><li>Emotional Intelligence.</li><li>teamwork.</li><li>Ministry.</li><li>Peer Influence within the Church.</li><li>Personal productivity.</li></ul>

The Positive Side of Peer Influence.

According to Daniel Goleman’s Mixed Model of EI, ‘Motivation’ is one of the key aspects of Emotional Intelligence. If a core aspect of leadership is the ability to motivate and inspire others toward set goals, then complete leaders ought to be strong in this area.Peer pressure, an agent of motivation, can be useful in motivating oneself in the practice of Self-leadership and motivating others during leadership.

Peer Pressure and Emotional Intelligence.

Positive peer influence paves the way for teamwork.Galvanizing a team toward the prompt accomplishment of a target will require a significant amount of undertaken teamwork.A peer system properly adopted could reinforce a clockwork synchronized work behavior for consistent results and faster turnouts.

Peer influence in teamwork.

If two different persons are both believers and disciples, then, by definition, they are peers because they share similar interests and belong to the family of God.The Great Commission instructs us to bring more people into this family. In other words, he says to the disciples, “Replicate after your kind” and leaves us information on how to do it.

Positive Peer influence and ministry.

Self-motivation is that side of self-management that involves you taking the initiative to start tasks, make forward progress, and eventually finish work.Belonging to a community with shared interests and goals could influence us to achieve goals set across our physical, mental, spiritual, and social life.

Positive Peer Influence and Personal Productivity.

Resistance to Peer Pressure Rises Between 14 and 18 – But Flatlines from 18 to 30.Source: <a href="https://firewalltimes.com/peer-pressure-statistics/#:~:text=However%2C%20once%20a%20person%20hits,remains%20constant%20throughout%20young%20adulthood.">FireWallTimes</a>This means that Peer pressure has a great influence that could be leveraged by young adults for good.

An interesting fact about Peer Pressure

Peer pressure can motivate self-leadership and leadership in motivating others.

religionandspirituality

Religion & Spirituality

career

Career

humanresources

Human Resources

leadershipandmanagement

Leadership & Management

What motivates you? Add positive peer influence to your motivation engine

Resding books written in other eras can help tu know thoughts, ideas, culture and costums of people who lived at that time.They are often hidden in romances, like Austen's novels, or other genres, which make the reading more pleasant even for young people.

Why Reading Classic Books?

-improve your vocabulary and fluency of speech-open your mind-more concentration-give new ideas or solutions for problems-make you think about yourself and life I decide to explain an example of meaning taking one of the most popular classic American book: Moby Dick by Herman Melville.

Benefits Of Reading💪🏻

Humans spend their entire life running towards obsessions, perfection, something is not available to them because ther are simply...human. And finally they get destroyed by this "unreachable" that has a different meaning for every man. Like captain Achab, who died because of the big white whale, Moby Dick, his only purpose since the ship left Nuntacket's harbour. He obsessively follow the whale to have his revenge (Moby Dick ate his leg during a previous hant), and he spent his entire life thinking about his revenge without living a real and full life.

The Meaning Behind Moby Dick

-The white whale swam in front of his eyes like the obsessive incarnation of all those forces of evil by which certain profound men feel themselves being bitten into their very depths. -But when we pursue those distant mysteries that we dream of, or torment ourselves in pursuit of that demonic ghost which sooner or later swims past all human hearts, when we thus hunt round this globe, those things bring us inside sterile labyrinths, or they leave us halfway, at the bottom.

Here Are Some Phrases That Excited Me😊

-the pirates immediately turn away, because they are evil scoundrels on both sides, and they don't like to see their own mutual scoundrel too much. (This remind me the projection by Carl G. Just I wrote about a few days ago, it was my first publication)

Reading is the only addiction that doesn't hurt, and it's the best cure for the soul.

Moby Dick, H. MelvilleThe old man and the sea, E. Hemingway To the lighthouse, V. WoolfOrlando,V. Woolf1984, G. OrwellPride & Prejudice, J. AustenUno,Nessuno e Centomila, L. PirandelloIl fu Mattia Pascal, L. PirandelloWuthering Heights, E. BrontëJane Eyre, C. Brontë

Here Are Some Of My Favourite Books🫂

"All that can be done is for each one of us to invent our own ideal library of our classics." --from Why Read the Classics? Classics, according to Italo Calvino, are not only works of enduring cultural value, but also something much more personal: talismans, touchstones, books through which we understand our world and ourselves. In Why Read the Classics?, Calvino shares over thirty of his classics in essays of warmth, humor, and striking insight. He ranges from Homer to Jorge Luis Borges, from the Persian folklorist Nezami to Charles Dickens. Whether tracing the links between Ovid's Metamorphoses and Alain Robbe-Grillet's objectivity, discovering the origins of science fiction in the writings of Cyrano de Bergerac, or convincing us that the Italian novelist Carlo Emilio Gadda's works are like artichokes, Calvino offers a new perspective on beloved favorites and introduces us to hidden gems. "This book serves as a welcome reminder that the great works are great because they can mean so much to readers, and Calvino is a most knowledgeable guide to all the best destinations." --San Francisco Chronicle

writing

Reading & Writing

books

Books

Italo Calvino

Why Read the Classics?

Small Smart Choices + Consistency + Time = RADICAL DIFFERENCE

If you were given a choice between taking $3 million in cash this very instant and a single penny that doubles in value every day for 31 days,which would you choose?Now, calculate independently and see the “magic” of compounding pennies.

Magic Penny

<ol><li>Larry didn’t change his routine, he did like he was doing always.</li><li>Scott started making some small, seemingly inconsequential, positive changes like reading 10 pages of a good book per day, 20 minutes of podcasts, cutting 125 calories from his diet every day, and walking a couple of extra steps daily. No big deal of bravery or grand effort was done. Doable? Yeah.</li><li>Brad, makes some poor choices, he bought a big screen TV, so he can watch more of his favorite programs, tried out new recipes on the food channel, and installed a bar in his room which added a few drinks per week. Nothing crazy, Right?</li></ol>

3 Friends, 3 Habits

At the end of 5-10 months, we can’t see any noticeable changes in any of their lives. They continued whatever they were doing.But at about month 25, we start seeing really measurable, visible differences.After 31 months or 940 days, When a detailed examination was done<ol><li>Brad got fatty because he ate 125 calories more than Scott, so he gained 33.5 pounds weight. Now he weighs 67 pounds more than Scott.</li><li>Scott besides being slim, light & active, gained great pieces of knowledge from books and podcasts. He got good raise and got promoted. His marriage is thriving.</li><li>Larry is pretty much same as he wa<warningtag>s.</warningtag></li></ol>

Short Term & Long Term Results

To understand this, we can put only 1 bad habit of Brad under the microscope—eating rich food more frequently—to know how the compound effect can work in a negative way and can create a ripple effect that impacts the whole life.<ul><li>As we already know, he makes recipes that he learned from TV, he makes some great desserts, and the family loves that, so he makes more of that and takes some extra share from that sweet.</li><li>This extra food makes him sluggish at night and wakes up a little groggy, which makes him cranky. This crankiness and sleep deprivation impacts his work performance, so gets insulted.</li></ul>

Ripple Effect

<ul><li>As he gets discouraging feedback from his boss, his energy level is way down, his commute seems longer and more stressful than ever. All this makes him reach for more comfort food (stress has a way of doing that).</li><li>So, he is now less likely to walk with his wife, like he used to. She misses their time together.</li><li>Now with fewer shared activities with his wife and an absence of fresh air and exercise, Brad is not getting the endorphin release, that can make him feel upbeat and enthusiastic.</li><li>Because he is not happy, he starts finding fault with himself & others, stop complimenting his wife like bef<warningtag>ore</warningtag></li></ul>

Ripple Effect Continued

<ul><li>Brad’s own self-esteem goes down, he started escaping from reality and starts losing himself in late-night TV shows.</li><li>His wife starts to complain, then becomes needy. When that doesn’t work, she emotionally withdraws to protect herself. She’s lonely. She spends more time with her girlfriends to fulfill her need for companionship. Men start flirting with her, which makes her feel desirable again. She would never cheat, but Brad feels that something’s wrong.</li><li>Instead of seeing that his poor choices and behaviors are the base of all these problems, he finds fault with his wife. Relationship is now ❌.</li></ul>

Ripple Effect Results

The most challenging aspect of the Compound Effect is that we have to keep working away for a while, consistently and efficiently, before we can begin to see the payoff. Our parents & grandparents knew this, they didn’t spend their money & time binge-watching, buying unusable stuff to get thinner, etc.Wealth tends to skip a generation.Why, because overwhelming abundance often leads to a lackadaisical mentality, which brings a sedentary lifestyle. Children of the wealthy are more susceptible. They weren’t the ones who developed the discipline and character to create wealth in the first place.

Psychology Of Wealth

Understanding the compound effect will rid you of “instant-results” expectations.Promise yourself that you’re going to let go once and for all of your lottery-winner expectations because, let’s face it, you only hear stories about the one winner, not the millions of losers. That person you see jumping up and down in front of the Vegas slot machine or at the Santa Anita horse track doesn’t reveal the hundreds of times that same person lost. If we go back to our mathematical chance of a positive result, again, we have a rounding error of zero—as in, you have about zero chance of winning.

Microwave Mentality 

Harvard psychologist Daniel Gilbert, author of Stumbling on Happiness, says that if we gave lottery losers every thirty seconds on TV to announce not, “I won!” but “I lost,” it would take almost nine years to get through the losers of a single drawing!Don’t try to fool yourself into believing that a mega-successful athlete didn’t live through regular bone-crushing drills and thousands of hours of practice. He got up early to practice—and kept practicing long after all others had stopped. He faced the frustration of the failure, loneliness, hard work, and disappointment it took to become No. 1.

Winner’s Work

We all come into this world the same: naked, scared, and ignorant. After that grand entrance, the life we end up with is simply an accumulation of all the choices we make. Our choices can be our best friend or our worst enemy. They can deliver us to our goals or send us orbiting into a galaxy far, far away.Think about it. Everything in your life exists because you first made a choice about something. Choices are at the root of every one of your results. Each choice starts a behavior that over time becomes a habit.Either you choose any habit or if you don’t, you get another option automatically

Choices

Ask yourself regularly- “How many of my behaviors have I not ‘voted on’? What am I doing that I didn’t consciously choose to do, yet continue to do every day?”

-Mosquito does. It means our very small, negligible choices every day affects us more than the big ones.e.g. you inhale a soda and bag of potato chips and suddenly realize only after you polished off the last chip that you blew an entire day of healthy eating—and you weren’t even hungry. You get caught up and lose two hours watching mindless TV—scratch that, let’s give you some credit and make it an educational documentary—before realizing you spaced on preparing for an important presentation to land a valuable client.You have allowed yourself to make a choice without thinking.CHOOSE WISELY.

Elephants Don’t Bite-

We are all self-made humans, but only the successful take credit for it.In a seminar author attended, speaker asked, “What percentage of shared responsibility do you have in making a relationship work?”People blurted and yelled different answers like 50-50, 80-20, 49-51 etc etc.The speaker turned to the easel and wrote 100-0 on the paper and said “You have to be willing to give 100 percent with zero expectation of receiving anything in return.”When you don’t take 100% responsibility, you opt for finger-pointing, victimhood, blaming, and expecting someone else/government to solve your problems.

Owning 100% 

You alone are responsible for what you do, don’t do, or how you respond to what’s done to you.

Preparation (personal growth, skills, knowledge, expertise, relationships, resources) + Attitude (belief/mindset) + Opportunity (a good thing coming your way) + Action (doing something about it) = Luck.

Complete Formula For Being Lucky

For being aware of your choices, you have to Track every action that relates to the area of your life you want to improve.<ul><li>If you want to get out of your debt, you need to start tracking every penny you spend out of your pocket.</li><li>If you want to lose some extra weight, you need to start tracking every single thing you put in your mouth.</li><li>If you want to train for an athletic event, you need to track every step you take, every workout you do.</li></ul>Simply carry a notepad and a writing instrument or just phone, and that's all. But do this without fail, no excuses, no exceptions. Think Big Bro is watching you.

Secret Weapon

This process forces you to be conscious of each of your decisions.Jim Rohn says, “What’s simple to do is also simple not to do”.Magic is not the complexity of the task, but it’s in doing the simple things repeatedly and long enough to ignite the miracle of the Compound Effect.

Advantages Of Tracking

Keeping an expense log just for 2 months makes you aware of your habits. You create a completely new set of choices and disciplines around spending.Since awareness and positive behaviors compound, you find yourself more proactive with money in general, you try to find areas like where to invest, save for retirement, and also find where it's a clear waste to spend money.A horse wins by a nose but gets 10 times the prize money. Was he 10 times faster? Not at all. Those extra laps, extra efforts and a little better-disciplined nutrition his jockey provided him have made the results a bit better.

Money Trap

Or savings tree.<ul><li>Prepare your own food instead of spending money outside.</li><li>Cancel some extra subscriptions.</li><li>Spend every penny consciously (needs vs wants).</li><li>Don’t buy anything on EMIs. Go for full payment.</li><li>Follow the 50-30-20 Rule- Spend 50% of your monthly income on your needs, 30% on Hobbies and entertainment, and save or invest the last 20% for the future.</li></ul>In his book Focal Point, Brian Tracy gave a simple success formula.<ul><li>Improve yourself or your earnings by 1/10 of 1% each work day. After a week, improvement goes to 1/2%, equalling 2% each month and 26% each year, and gets double in 2.9 years.</li></ul>

Grow Your Money Tree

Why are we so irrationally enslaved by so many bad habits? Because our need for Immediate gratification can turn us into the most reactive, nonthinking animals around.<ul><li>If you took a bite of a Big Mac and immediately fell due to heart attack, you might not go back for second bite.</li><li>If your next puff of cigarette turn your face into a 90 year old person’s face, chances are you’ll pass on the cigarette.</li><li>If the first piece of cake instantly put 50 pounds, saying “no thanks” to dessert would be the true piece of cake.</li></ul>The slightest adjustments to your daily routines can dramatically alter the results.

Instant Gratification Trap

It's not so much, that you want to take out of your life, instead, add some beneficial options in advance. For example, Don't think (“I can’t eat a hamburger, chocolate, or dairy”). But Add your Healthy option so there is no place for the worse. (e.g., “Today I’m going to have a salad, steamed vegetables and fresh figs”).Fill your focus and belly with what you can have, so you no longer have attention or hunger for what you can’t.<ul><li>Choose a hobby instead of binge-watching.</li><li>Choose to play with your kids than be a couch potato.</li><li>Choose your own ADD IN rather than the choices your inactivity gives you</li></ul>

ADD IN Principle

Find a Peak Performance Partner (PPP), he/she can be your success buddy in your paths of different aspects of life. Give personal appreciation for their performance and get praise for your achievements too.

Personalise

I found that Compounding is vital across various aspects of life i.e. finance, education, health, skills, productivity, personal development, emotional well-being and relationships. In essence, compounding serves as a foundational principle that magnifies progress, allowing gradual, sustained efforts to yield remarkable results across diverse life domains.

The New York Times and Wall Street Journal bestseller, based on the principle that little, everyday decisions will either take you to the life you desire or to disaster by default. No gimmicks. No Hyperbole. No Magic Bullet. The Compound Effect is a distillation of the fundamental principles that have guided the most phenomenal achievements in business, relationships, and beyond. This easy-to-use, step-by-step operating system allows you to multiply your success, chart your progress, and achieve any desire. If you're serious about living an extraordinary life, use the power of The Compound Effect to create the success you want. You will find strategies including: <ul><li>How to win--every time! The No. 1 strategy to achieve any goal and triumph over any competitor, even if they're smarter, more talented or more experienced.</li><li>Eradicating your bad habits (some you might be unaware of!) that are derailing your progress.</li><li>The real, lasting keys to motivation--how to get yourself to do things you don't feel like doing.</li><li>Capturing the elusive, awesome force of momentum. Catch this, and you'll be unstoppable.</li><li>The acceleration secrets of superachievers. Do they have an unfair advantage? Yes they do, and now you can too! </li></ul>

moneyandinvestments

Money & Investments

problemsolving

Problem Solving

Darren Hardy is an American author, keynote speaker, advisor, and former publisher of SUCCESS magazine. Hardy is a New York Times best-selling author, who wrote The Entrepreneur Roller Coaster, Living Your Best Year Ever and The Compound Effect. 

Darren Hardy

The Compound Effect

"No matter how much effort people put in, they can't do the things they don't enjoy."

This is the first phase when you are new to learning a new skill. It's important to remember that you are like a kid who is learning something new. If it's too hard or boring, then you might lose interest and stop doing it.

Kid Phase

After doing the task for some time, you enter the teen phase where you start to feel more confident and want to show off your skills. You might also want to make it a permanent part of your life if it helps you climb the social ladder. But even if it doesn't, you will still do it until you get what the kid wants. In this phase, due to a sense of logic and calmness, you will be able to handle a few things which oppose dopamine. Now, it's okay if the task would be a little bit harder, boring, frustrating or little long.

Teen Phase

After doing it for a long time, you enter the adult phase where you have gained enough experience and knowledge to balance the dopamine and the things that oppose it.

Adult Phase

This is the final phase where the skill has become a permanent part of your life and you don't care if it's fun or boring. You just do it.

Old Phase

Skills which can't balance the dopamine VS resistance ratio can never be learnt with perfection. Brain will resist or love the task depending upon how much it enjoys doing it. But slowly & steadily, the ratio will fade away by removing and adding cues & cravings throughout the four phases.

Conclusion

A brainstorming session after watching a few documentaries, podcasts, movies & reading self help books led to these ideas

productivity

Productivity

parenting

Parenting

The Four Phases Of Learning: From Kid To Old

Building mental toughness is a state of mind that enables you to face and overcome challenges and adversities that come into your life.

Mental Toughness

If you want to build a tough mind, you need to practice self-discipline. Discipline is the most important trait in self-development. When you have a disciplined mind, all great things will fall into place.
Start by building a habit and be consistent in doing that habit.

Discipline Is The Key

Change your mindset about struggles in life. Embrace adversities as opportunities for growth and developing a strong mind, much like accepting a gift.

Embracing Adversities

Setting realistic goals in your life will improve your mind's ability to take action and work towards achieving those goals. Don't give up until you achieve your goals. Along the way, you will encounter challenges and setbacks that will shape your mind to be mentally tough.

Set Realistic Goals

You have the power over your mind, not outside events. realize this, and you'll find strength.

Being a mentally tough person can help you achieve great things in life

strategy

Strategy

How to Build Mental Toughness

Self-abandonment begins in childhood. Its likely that your parents or other influential adults didn't meet your emotional and/or physical needs in childhood they abandoned you emotionally or physically — causing you to feel unworthy and unlovable.
As adults, we tend to repeat these types of patterns from childhood because they're familiar; we repeatedly choose partners and friends who mistreat, take advantage of, or don't support us. And we do the same to ourselves. We don't know how to be there for ourselves because no one was truly there for us as children.

Unmasking Self-Abandonment: Tracing Its Origins

Notice how many of these examples of self-abandonment ring true for you.
<ul>
<li>Not trusting your instincts</li>
<li>People-pleasing</li>
<li>Hiding parts of yourself</li>
<li>Perfectionism</li>
<li>Self-criticism and judgment</li>
<li>Not honoring your needs</li>
<li>Suppressing your feelings</li>
<li>Not acting according to your values</li>
<li>Codependent relationships</li>
<li>Not speaking up for yourself</li>
</ul>

Breaking the Cycle: Escaping the Chains of Self-Abandonment

Self-abandonment is a self-destructive pattern that can contribute to anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, and unfulfilling relationships. Abandoning yourself may have been a necessity during childhood, but it isn't helpful anymore. So, let's look at how you can begin to trust and value yourself.

Embracing Your True Self: Overcoming Self-Abandonment

Everyone has feelings and needs. You may not have been allowed to express them as a child (or even in some of your adult relationships), but you can now be a safe haven for your own feelings and needs. If you listen, your feelings will tell you what you need and when you meet your needs, you'll be happier and healthier.The objective is to stay present with your difficult feelings, rather than to abandon yourself when you feel overwhelmed. Meditation is another tool that can help you cultivate acceptance of and tolerance for your feelings.

Allow yourself to have feelings and needs.

Do you have a hard time trusting yourself? Do you hide parts of yourself your feelings, beliefs, and ideas in 

Why We Abandon Ourselves and How to Stop

Find 100+ Psychology Facts about Human Behaviour, Mind or Nature - Curated from Videos, Podcasts, Books & Articles - Genuine Insights from Other People

Is Stress Still Taboo At Work? 6 Reasons Why We Should Be Open About It

In Praise of Doing Nothing

Be Confident: Use Body Language to Boost Your Influence & Income | Mel Robbins Podcast

What motivates you? Add positive peer influence to your motivation engine

Why Read the Classics?

The Compound Effect

The Four Phases Of Learning: From Kid To Old

How to Build Mental Toughness

Why We Abandon Ourselves and How to Stop

Marcus Aurelius

It's time to
Read like a Pro.

Is Stress Still Taboo At Work? 6 Reasons Why We Should Be Open About It

In Praise of Doing Nothing

Be Confident: Use Body Language to Boost Your Influence & Income | Mel Robbins Podcast

What motivates you? Add positive peer influence to your motivation engine

Why Read the Classics?

The Compound Effect

The Four Phases Of Learning: From Kid To Old

How to Build Mental Toughness

Why We Abandon Ourselves and How to Stop

Marcus Aurelius

It's time to Read like a Pro.

It's time to
Read like a Pro.